Kiss Me Through The Screen
by Ischemia
Summary: Kaminari runs a PG-13 webcam and Shinsou is in love. "Lonely? Tired of coming home to an empty apartment? Can't find anyone to listen to your problems? Say no more! For the low cost of 10 per stream, you can have all the company and love you ever wanted. Get a best friend for the best price!"
1. Chapter 1

Brats were cute, and fulfilling students, but by Friday night Shinsou never wanted to see another child again. He loved his job as a teacher and he never regretted his decision to follow in his father's footsteps, he just wished that he could get through even one week without having to physically separate two children from fighting over a box of legos.

The purple-haired man walked into his home and unceremoniously dropped his bag by the front door, before looking at his incredibly empty apartment. He'd started living here after graduating from school and getting his teacher's license. His dad, Aizawa, and his papa, Hizashi, had chipped in on the deposit so he could move in before his job started in the fall.

Now it was two months into the school year and he was finding himself more exhausted than he had ever been in teachers college. When he was merely a student or assistant it was so much easier. There was a weight of responsibility that he hadn't felt until it was just Hitoshi and twenty children who depended on him for care and education.

He walked into what he called the living room but was honestly just the most open space in the studio apartment that had a couch shoved into it, and fell onto the cushions with a huff. Shinsou looked at his watch, a very practical gift from his sleepy dad, and saw he had exactly 11 minutes until his date.

Shinsou guessed that ' date' was a strong word for a streaming service he paid for. This site was run by a bubbly blonde guy with a weird black bolt in his hair who posed as the best friend, and sometimes boyfriend, of dozens of people each night. Ever since he'd found "Ch4rgeb0lt" and his stream he'd felt a lot less lonely.

Shinsou remembers when he first saw the ad for Ch4rgeb0lt's services. He was just messing around online when a pop-up appeared with his smiling face, one eye winking and the other brightly flashing with happiness.

"Lonely? Tired of coming home to an empty apartment? Can't find anyone to listen to your problems? Say no more! For the low cost of $10 per stream, you can have all the company and love you ever wanted. Get a best friend for the best price!"

His first reaction was, "what kind of depressing loser needs to buy a boyfriend?" before he looked around at his empty home and realized he might be that depressing loser.

He grabbed his wallet from his pocket and stared at the $20 folded up, and fuck he never thought he'd have to look at money in increments of how many nights he could have of fake companionship.

It was every evening, around late dinner time, and an hour long. Whoever this kid was he was getting paid below minimum wage. Shinsou hoped that at least he ran his own business and wasn't giving 'relationship' money to some shady friend-pimp.

Hitoshi had spent that very first night inputting his credit card information into a dubious website and then microwaved a frozen dinner to eat while he watched. Shinsou had tried to convince himself he could use the experience for educational purposes on the human desire for companionship if nothing else. He hadn't been a psychology major for nothing. No money wasted. Hitoshi wasn't lonely, because he was doing this for science.

That first stream had him sold in ten minutes. Ch4rgeb0lt was as sweet as can be and waved to his webcam like the viewers were old friends. He must have really known who was who because he'd picked up on Shinsou being new right away.

"Hey there, MindWash! Welcome to the stream. Let me know if there's anything you want me to explain, ok? There is no such thing as a stupid question- except for all the ones I asked back in high school. Man, my teachers must have hated me."

Shinsou felt obligated to reply via the chat.

 _I'm a teacher, are you sure you_ should _be telling me that? Doesn't bode very well for our future relationship to hear that up front._

The blonde laughed, his eyes lit with mischief. "Well, we've got ourselves a fancy professor with us! You sound real bright. You must teach something serious. Like how western theology changed keystone aspects of medieval building techniques?"

 _No, something far more difficult. 4th graders._

Ch4rgeb0lt laughed uproariously, "4th grade?! That sucks, man! Doesn't that make them like, 10?"

 _9 or 10, yes, but they act like they're 5._

"Rough! So tell me, hot stuff. Have you decided whether you're on Team Besties or Team Bae?"

Shinsou was glad there was no video on any of the viewer's side or the blonde would see his eyes go wide.

 _...What?_

Another member in the chat, MeatMeOutBack29, quickly typed into the chat the difference between the two: " _Team Bestie is for those who are here for a platonic relationship. They are here because they want to talk with Ch4rgeb0lt and have him as a best friend. A person who wishes to 'date' Ch4rgeb0lt, to the extent that this medium allows, would consider themselves his partner or Team Bae_."

For a long while Shinsou had confused user 'MeatMeOutBack29' as a moderator of some sort because they had this self-righteous idea that he/she/ze/they(?) were the one running everything and setting the rules. Hitoshi is glad people like them exist since it saves him the trouble of asking anything himself.

The chat box to the right blew up with people's own stances, " _team besties 4_ lyyyyfee _!_ " "Ch4rgeb0lt is BAE," and Shinsou's personal favorite, " _insert the commercial with the taco girl saying 'why not both?' here_."

The blonde responded to them all with an affectionate coo and then he wrapped his arms around himself in a big hug. "You guys are the sweetest!"

The chat responded positively and soon Ch4rgeb0lt built an easy rhythm of talking to his _friends_ (?) _dates_ (?) and generally making everyone feel special and paid attention to. The dorky boy sat there wearing an ugly zebra-print shirt and had his blonde hair clipped behind his right ear with two sparkly blue barrettes. He ate a Cup Noodles with the grace of someone dining on lobster, all the while cracking jokes and complimenting his virtual dates.

Sometimes Ch4rgeb0lt would playfully use his quirk to get a laugh. He had a surprisingly powerful electricity quirk, which lent itself to a lot of gags. On occasion, he would charge his phone by adorably biting on the cable. He sometimes decided to show off by licking the end of a flashlight to make it flicker, adding a "ta-dah!" afterward, but once he ended up getting accused of being lewd by a dirty-minded viewer and hasn't done it since. He got incredibly flustered and his eyes went wide. "Oh my gosh, you know I didn't mean it that way! Ughhh, you guys!" but even as he turned bright red he laughed right along with the rest of the chat.

Ch4rgeb0lt was a pure soul that sat across from him eating dinner and lavishing him with attention, and Shinsou couldn't get enough of it.

The purple haired boy smiled softly just thinking about tonight's 'date' and what Ch4rgeb0lt would do or say. Hitoshi even bought himself a Cup Noodles so they would match, though he'd had to defend this decision when Aizawa caught him with some in his cupboard. ("I only eat it once a week, dad. I'm not going to die of malnutrition just because I don't come to you and papa for dinner every night! " )

Hitoshi wasn't eager to tell his dad that it was so he could play pretend boyfriends with a cute blonde stranger he was paying for attention. His dad already had a cute blonde husband to eat with, and Shinsou was just trying to do his level best to have the same.

Hot water was poured into the styrofoam noodle cup, right up to the marked line on the inside, and the smell of dried processed chicken hit his senses. This was Hitoshi's favorite comfort food.

He checked his watch again and found he only had a few minutes left until Ch4rgeb0lt got started. He walked back to the couch and carefully set his steaming noodles on the table beside his ancient laptop. Shinsou pulled up the page he had bookmarked and entered his login information. Soon he was on the chat page with dozens of other early viewers waiting for the black screen to be filled with a pretty face and a welcoming smile.

His laptop's speakers crackled as the "live" signal flickered on beside a pixelated mess. Then, all at once, sound and light slid into place while Ch4rgeb0lt was adjusting his headphones with one hand and checking his mic with the other.

"Hey, gents, gals, and everyone outside and in-between! Gimmie, like, two shakes of a rabbit's tail or whatever." Ch4rgeb0lt was outrageously pansexual so the chat was made up of all sorts of genders.

He hummed to himself, the sweet voice warbling in and out, while he played with a cord on his set up until the image went sharp. The blonde let out a relieved sigh and sat back.

Tonight he wore a just-a-bit-too-big sweatshirt with Pikachu on it and a pair of too-short jean shorts. Shinsou had a feeling he wasn't going to be the only person enjoying that decision. His hair was pulled back into small but poofy pigtails, and he had his signature two silver lightning bolts hanging from his right earlobe. At first, Shinsou thought Ch4rgeb0lt was a bad dresser, had even mentioned it on the chat, and was met with a lot of protective fans. Ch4rgeb0lt himself had laughed it off and explained that everyone always said that in the beginning but these clothes made him happy so everyone will just have to deal with it. A fan had told Shinsou that "one day it'll become one of your favorite things about him, trust me!" and he might actually owe that person thanks. He's glad he stuck around, either way.

After the screen had fully buffered, it now showed a freshly showered Ch4rgeb0lt, the ends of his pigtails still damp, blowing softly on the steaming Cup Noodles he held with both hands. The blonde smiled and waved at his camera with his pinkies.

"Hey, sweetheart, what have you been up to today?"

He often spoke as if it was to only one person, and it really helped sell the idea that it was just you and him.

Shinsou typed a response, _Just pulling jelly beans out of a child's nose. You know. The usual._

Ch4rgeb0lt's eyes skimmed over the chat before the blonde let out an adorable giggle-snort.

"Oh man, MindWash! You seriously need to start your own stream and just talk about your job. But don't stop watching mine when you get all famous, ok?"

 _No promises. I hear fame changes people._

Ch4rgeb0lt giggled again before turning to read the rest of the chat.

The usual answers to this question were a variety of " _nothing that interesting_ ," " _just my dead-end job_ ," and the vaguely creepy, " _just waited for you all day : )_ " thrown in. Shinsou was fairly confident that his replies were always the most interesting, and not just because his life was frequently ridiculous. Shinsou knew his dry sense of humor was the trick to making Ch4rgeb0lt laugh. Something that had become increasingly important to him over the past couple weeks, but he didn't like to think too deeply about that.

MeatMeOutBack29 had a habit of sending money through the website with a request attached. This feature was usually used to get extra personal attention. Tonight, MeatMeOutBack29 had sent $30 and instructions for Ch4rgeb0lt to look at the camera and say:

"Hey there, Shi-chan! Looking hot tonight, babe!" and then blow a kiss.

The blonde did this, gave his exaggerated wink, and then followed it up by slurping some noodles from his still hot cup. The chat exploded with things like " _say my name too!_ " and " _no fair!_ " MeatMeOutBack29 was smug enough to send a couple more dollars with the public note, " Just a smile this time ."

Ch4rgeb0lt crossed his gold eyes and gave a goofy grin, most likely not the type of smile the viewer had intended, but it had the right effect of entertaining the stream. It devolved into random chatter and Ch4rgeb0lt worked his magic of paying everyone just enough attention to feel wanted, but it never felt like enough to Hitoshi.

Shinsou sent the boy $10 through the website, with a public note that read:

 _Please buy something more nutritious than Cup Noodles. I'm getting scurvy just watching you._

Ch4rgeb0lt's eyes lit up at the note, "Thanks MindWash! I can get, like, ten more Cup Noodles with these!"

Shinsou snorted into his dinner. He should have known that's how the blonde would react. The boy continued by adding, "And oh man, you must really like me. I mean, you're paying 10 bucks every night just to get scurvy? Love you too, sweetstuff!"

Hitoshi felt his pulse flutter. The moments where Ch4rgeb0lt threw out words like 'love' so easily were the ones that he kept closest to his heart. The stream immediately became a parade of " _tell me you love me too!_ " and " _forget him! I love you MORE!_ " to which Ch4rgeb0lt would just giggle and assure his fans, "Now, now you know I love each and every one of you!" before putting his food down to make a heart shape with his hands.

It wasn't long before the stream came to an end. It always felt too quick for Shinsou, but an hour goes by fast when you're with your virtual boyfriend.

Ch4rgeb0lt always finishes the stream with a particular ritual. Starting with the good night kiss. Sometimes the kiss will be him leaning over and smooching the webcam and other times he kisses his fingers and then presses them to the lens. Upon pain of death, Shinsou will never reveal that on those nights he does the same thing back.

Tonight Ch4rgeb0lt lifted the webcam up and gave it a loud 'mwah,' giggling to himself. After he put it down he closed the show with his usual sign-off.

He lifted up one finger on each hand, and let a strike of electricity jump from one to the other before chirping, "Zap you later, babe!" and used his quirk to shut down the video feed.

After the stream went dark, only the chat was left. Many quickly logged off but some would stay afterward and talk with each other. Occasionally, Shinsou would wait and read their conversations, which was usually a variation of " _he looked so cute tonight!_ " " _I told my mom I have a boyfriend now and she wants to meet him! Do you think I can just show her the stream_?" and the recently popular " _I'm saving up money for one of his special one-on-one shows!_ "

Ch4rgeb0lt had advertised that, courtesy of not making enough at his barista job, he was taking some days off during the week and having special private sessions with people for a pretty penny. Shinsou thought about his teacher's salary and grimaced. It was fine. He didn't know what he'd do if he actually got all his "boyfriend's" attention anyway. Probably type awkward responses and end up telling student stories to distract the blonde from how bad he is at real one-on-one conversation.

The purple haired man closed his laptop and put away his trash. He had half an hour to grade papers before a quick shower and then finally the sweet pull of sleep would (hopefully) claim him. He did his best to not let the image of kind yellow eyes distract him, but he knew he'd end up dreaming about them.

Shinsou sighed. He really needed to get a hobby.


	2. Chapter 2

Developmentally, 4th graders are a very challenging bunch. Some ten-year-olds show the first signs of puberty during this time, and children are difficult enough without adding extra hormones into the mix.

Class was starting in five minutes and Shinsou wanted to be prepared. He had managed to grade all of the papers, and now triumphantly pulled the stack of handouts from his bag and looked through them for a second time. Not to mention he had to deal with teaching all of the students how to manage their quirks.

Out of all the members of his class, there were some who especially stood out. Four kids that drove him insane every day and made him question his career choices.

The most challenging, Tomura Shigaraki, wasn't just tough to deal with because of his quirk. He had also managed to become the ringleader that everyone listened to, and he could destroy the educational atmosphere just as easily as his quirk could destroy his desk. Again.

His parents had bought him special gloves to cover most of his fingers, but the little brat had no qualms taking them off. The boy would shrug and answer him with a devastatingly unapologetic, "Sorry teach, I accidentally ruined my homework."

 _'Accidentally' my ass._

Toga Himiko, remarkably, did do her homework but would not stop biting the other children if she was in a mischievous mood- which was always. The number of times Shinsou had to pry her off of Chizome "Stain" Akaguro (nicknamed because that kid was constantly getting food all over his clothes) was becoming ridiculous. God forbid either of them draw blood while she's at it, considering their quirks.

Todoroki Dabi was a little punk, and his father was somehow the number two hero and the number one asshole, but he followed class directions if you leveled with him. For someone raised in a household like his, Shinsou was astounded that he turned out as okay as he did. "Okay" being a flexible term, but he'd take what he could get. He got shivers just remembering they had parent-teacher conferences coming up soon.

Kai Chisaki continues to be more self-righteous than any ten year old has reason to be, but there was always one student like that every year. He also spent more time washing his hands than he did studying. Maybe he would balance out Chizome's constantly sticky fingers. Shinsou has yet to find out why they are always sticky, but he tries his best not to think about it. He's hoping it's juice.

In general, the grade was actually filled with a lot of good kids. They were still a wild handful, because what kind of class isn't, but they were his wild handful and he loved his job. He tried to remind himself of that every time the kids came in.

Only some of the students were still brought to school by their parents- ten guesses to whether or not Dabi gets a loving family escort. Much to the delight of teasing kids, Kai gets walked to school with his mother holding his hand (his confoundingly sticky hand). Toga is brought by her nanny, who is always happy to pass her off onto Shinsou's care, and Tomura strolls in alone at the last possible second.

Hitoshi quietly groaned into his stack of papers and told himself that if his dad could do it then so could he. If only he had the same student wrangling skills his adopted father had. Life goals, he supposes.

Shinsou clapped his hands to get the attention of the class, "All right, you delightful brats. How many of you accidentally forgot to do your homework?"

Four hands went up.

Outside of a thorough education, teaching college had led him to meet some close friends. Tsuyu, Ochako, and Midoriya (who also worked full-time as a pro-hero because he had clearly never learned how to rest for two minutes) were in the same class that he was. Those three now taught exclusively at UA but were apparently required to take some courses before becoming proper professors regardless of the school's quirk-training focus.

He spent the most time with Tsuyu, as their schedules matched frequently, and she did less pro-hero work than the other two. He also considered her the most tolerable, by far, of the three.

So when he got a text inviting him to a late lunch with the frog girl (elementary schools went from 8:35 AM to 12:00 PM) he was quick to accept. He could use some social interaction that he wasn't paying for. Not that any of his friends knew what he did most nights. Hitoshi has canceled a lot of dinner invitations, and he wouldn't be surprised if his friends suspected he was dying with how often he was "feeling really sick, sorry."

The purple haired man collected his books and folders before slipping them into his bag. All of the students had been picked up or walked home on their own (looking at you, Dabi), and he was finally free to leave.

His phone buzzed.

 **Tsuyu:** Want to meet at the usual place, ribbit?

 **You:** Sure. You know that you don't have to write 'ribbit,' or is this just something you do to be obnoxious?

 **Tsuyu:** Yes, ribbit.

Shinsou rolled his eyes. This was exactly why he liked her and also why he wanted to hit her. He always felt that's what having a good friend should be like, but then again he was taking his dad's actions as an example. In which case, true love was wanting to never see that person again while simultaneously never wanting them out of sight.

Hizashi was an awfully good sport about it.

The "usual place" was a hole-in-the-wall restaurant, named Sato's, that sold coffee more expensive than it should be and had desserts that were hit or miss. What it did have was a seriously delicious lunch and dinner selection. Whoever cooked this food must have had a tastes-ridiculously-good quirk because their okonomiyaki was grilled to perfection and the gyudon melted in your mouth.

Shinsou had joked, numerous times, that they should add an insect-based menu specifically due to Tsuyu's frequent visits. This jest was never well received, but word must have gotten to the cook because the next week's udon was topped with shaved cricket. However the fuck that works Hitoshi may never know.

Tsuyu was waiting just outside the door when Shinsou walked up. The tables outside the cafe were full to burst and it looked like the inside wasn't any better.

"I think we single-handedly made this place popular, ribbit."

Hitoshi squinted in search of a possible table, "how long is the wait?"

The frog girl sighed, "thirty minutes. Are you up to waiting that long or should we look for something else?"

Shinsou shrugged, "Want to just pull up a map and see what else is around?"

Asui nodded but looked reluctant. Both of them were creatures of habit, and craving their regular dishes, but the two were starving and too tired to stand around. Tsuyu lifted up her phone to share the screen with him and opened a map of nearby eateries.

The standard fast food places showed up in droves, a couple of high class sounding restaurants peppered the area, and not far from them was a small cafe called 'Amped Up'.

"What about this place, ribbit?"

Shinsou leaned over her to click on the cafe and bring up more information. It had an impressive 4.7/5 stars and a long list of good reviews. The two looked at each other and seemed to silently agree.

Hitoshi swiveled Tsuyu in the right direction before starting to walk, "It's only a couple of blocks down, at least. Do you have to rush back to UA later?"

"Not really, it's about to be the weekend anyway. I'll swing by the kids' dorms around curfew to make sure they're in bed, but that's not till 9."

Both teachers walked in silence towards the much-lauded cafe and lamented missing out on their usual meals.

The outside of Amped Up showed it had a pretty serious musical theme. The neon sign was shaped like a guitar and had "Amped Up" written inside it, flashing obnoxiously. Shinsou was feeling pretty dubious about the choice they had made, but it was too late now. Worst case scenario they go back to Sato's and wait for a table.

The window showed the inside of the cafe was dark-toned but cozy looking, and someone had used glass paint to draw a cartoon Beethoven rocking hard on an electric bass plugged into an oversized amp. Next to the drawing, a careful script read "Our neighbors are listening to great music...whether they like it or not."

Tsuyu snickered at the sight, and then held open the door for Hitoshi like the true gentleperson she was.

As he entered the cafe, he noticed quiet rock playing, an abundance of Christmas lights, and a familiar voice. A friendly, beautiful, familiar voice.

There, his back turned but his body movements and blonde hair recognizable, Hitoshi's internet angel was finishing a story with the words, "-and then I said 'Rectum? More like wrecked 'em!"

Shinsou's heart stuttered.

 _I'm in love._


	3. Chapter 3

There, in all his dorky glory, was Ch4geb0lt. Turning around in what might as well have been slow motion considering how Shinsou felt watching the blonde. His feet brought him closer and before he'd realized it he was standing at the counter and staring hard at the dream in front of him.

The shorter boy gave Hitoshi a 100-watt grin, "Hey there, what can I getcha?"

 _A date._

"Um, a medium latte please." Shinsou wasn't even sure if it was on the menu, he couldn't peel his eyes from the man before him, but he was confident that any coffee shop could make a latte.

The blonde got excited, "You want some foam art in that? I'm super good."

Basic coffee conversation. Shinsou could totally do this.

"Yes. Cat."

 _Monosyllabic answers. Great job._

The angelic barista looked delighted at his dumb response. "One 'Yes Cat' it is!" The blonde winked before turning to write on a medium sized cup with a sharpie, "What's your name?"

He did his best not to stutter when he replied, "Shinsou."

Ch4rgeb0lt scribbled it down, the tip of his tongue adorably sticking out from his lips in concentration, something he'd seen him do dozens of times during the stream, before he moved over to a large coffee machine. "Alright, a medium 'Yes Cat' latte coming up!"

Hitoshi, still mortified at his dreadful conversation skills, realized he'd missed a chance to ask the boy what his name was, and he couldn't fully see the nametag he was wearing on his dark blue apron. D-something? Either way, the purple haired man couldn't afford to hold up the line so he quickly nodded towards the very pink girl at the register, who told him he can pay later. Not knowing what the protocol after this was, he went and leaned against the wall to wait for his drink.

It wasn't long before Shinsou saw Ch4rgeb0lt leaning over his freshly made latte with an incredibly serious expression, using a toothpick to draw carefully in the foam.

Shinsou knew he was staring like a stalker and decided to use this time to observe his surroundings. The menu was written in chalk and took up an entire wall.

Some of the drinks had the worst music-based names Shinsou had ever seen. Things like, "Chai-kovsky," "Staccatoccino," and "A Minor shot of espresso." The puns didn't stop there. All around the cafe were similar phrases. The garbage bins in the corner had been painted to read: "Throw away your trash, don't be a Litterachi!" (and while Hitoshi got the joke he was disappointed in the misspelling, It should be _litterace_ , damn it). The Menu was called The Liszt. A sign behind the register, probably for breaks, read "Bach in a second!" and the tip jar had a small plaque that said "Tip us! We're Baroque!"

It was pretty brutal.

What was even worse is that Hitoshi was internally laughing at every single one of them. Asui must have felt the same way because she nearly choked on her own tongue- and she only did that when she was _really_ taken with something. She'd learned how to control all of her froggy appendages by the time she was "still a tadpole, thank you very much, ribbit."

The shop was clearly dedicated to the theme in every aspect. It took a lot of skill to make the food and drinks match the musicality. Looking into the display case Hitoshi could see cupcakes that had flat black icing styled to look like little records, croissants that were topped with chocolate glaze in the shape of bass and treble clefs, and brownies that had white piano keys carefully iced, in equal stripes with the dark of the brownie, across the top of them. They all looked delicious and Shinsou planned on trying every one of them. These future visits being completely unrelated to the staff, of course.

Next time he'll find out Ch4rgeb0lt's real name for sure. Maybe when they leave he could say goodbye to him and catch a glimpse. Shinsou was sure it'd be a cute name, whatever it was.

As if the world could sense his frustration, a lanky black-haired barista was hovering behind his blonde not-boyfriend, critiquing his art skills, and he overheard the man say, "Real great job, Denks. It looks like a bloated seal." Ch4rgeb0lt weakly shoved the other staff member and stuck out his tongue.

 _Denks? That's a stupid name, but somehow he still makes it work._

The two men were obviously close, and it made Shinsou feel jealous in a way he knew he wasn't entitled to be. He gave the blonde money for attention; he didn't get to be selfish with the boy's actual life. He just hoped they weren't anything more. Ideally they were just really good co-workers, and the place looked pretty casual.

Hitoshi heard someone call out his name- his _actual_ _name_ not just MindWash, oh my god- and looked up to the counter. Ch4rgeb0lt was finished and they locked eyes.

The blonde held out the drink with both hands, "Here you go, handsome! Come back soon, okay?"

 _Heart attack. I'm going to have a heart attack. He said my name. He called me handsome. He probably says that to a lot of customers but holy shit it's different to hear it actually spoken to instead of through a webcam._

Shinsou shuffled over to his drink. He looked at the cup and saw in the foam was a cartoonish cat with "YES" written above it.

 _Fuck, that's cute._

Hitoshi wore his usual lack of expression on his face when he replied, "Thank you, Denks."

The blonde must have set the cup on the counter so he wouldn't drop it. He immediately went red and made a sound like he couldn't decide if he was embarrassed or found it hysterical. His co-worker let out a horrible strangled laugh before doubling over and hitting Denks on the back in amusement. So much so that the man was near to hyperventilating. Shinsou had no idea what the hell he had done wrong but he wasn't going to stick around for it. He carefully picked the cup up and power walked over to a chuckling Tsuyu. She appeared positively sinister in her amusement as she dragged him to sit down at a table.

"You have _no_ idea how much that hurt to watch, ribbit."

It wasn't like he could tell her he was shocked to see his fake boyfriend. Luckily he worked with kids and that meant he was quick on his feet when it came to excuses.

"I heard his friend say his name so I thought I was being polite. It's not that weird. He's actually a pretty well-known YouTuber. I was just surprised to see him in real life."

 _Not exactly a whole lie, but not exactly a whole truth._

Tsuyu looked skeptical as she sipped her Chai-kovsky, "I'd ask if you think the pink girl behind the counter was into me but that's a lost cause. You clearly had your eyes focused on someone else." She peered over at her friend's drink, "Oh my gosh, that's adorable. You actually got a Yes Cat. Which was also _so_ embarrassing, ribbit. I wanted to pretend I didn't know you but then I'd have to eat all our food by myself."

Shinsou grimaced, but he knew he'd say the same thing if their roles were reversed. "I didn't even think to pick a meal."

"I already ordered for us. I figured you'd forget. Since what you wanted to eat wasn't technically on the menu, ribbit."

Hitoshi groaned, "Will we ever get past this or is this what the rest of the day is going to look like?"

Tsuyu croaked out a laugh, "the rest of the day? More like the rest of the _year_. We are definitely coming back."

The purple-haired man looked down at his drink. He didn't want to ruin the little Yes Cat but it smelled really good. Tsuyu must have deciphered his struggle because she grabbed her coffee stir and attacked the foam picture until it was nothing but swirls.

"What the fuck, Tsu!"

"You're welcome. Now you can drink it, ribbit."

Shinsou grumbled into his drink as he lifted it to his mouth, "You're such a bitch." He then proceeded to make a positively obscene sound after taking a sip. "Holy crap, you have to try this. Wait, nevermind I don't want to share any."

Asui held her own drink further away from him, "Say goodbye to taste-testing my delicious Chai-kovsky, then."

Shinsou took a big gulp of his latte, "You can shove your Chai-kovsky."

Tsuyu snorted, "Ignoring your inability to be a human in front of cute boys, I got us two muffins, a plate of Takoyaki, and a pair of 'Tubas'."

Hitoshi furrowed his brow. "What kind of food are Tubas supposed to be?"

"The hot lady wouldn't tell me, but they were a dollar each."

Before they could continue they were interrupted by the waitress. The pink girl- Shinsou could see her name tag read Mina- set down the plates gently, all the while keeping eye contact with Tsuyu.

She winked, "Nice tongue."

Asui didn't miss a beat, "Yeah, the ladies tell me that a lot."

Mina grinned wide and gave a wolf-whistle before returning to the register with an exaggerated swing in her hips.

 _Girls._

Shinsou huffed at her, "You are absolutely not allowed to tease me If you're going to try and pick up our waitress."

Tsuyu calmly took a bite from her muffin before speaking with her mouth full, "except _I_ was smooth as hell and _you_ acted like you'd been punched in the brain. So I can do whatever I want."

Shinsou had to give her that. Tsu had always been good with the ladies. Hell, she was good with everyone. Frogs were notoriously promiscuous creatures. If his pride ever allowed him he might ask her for tips.

It turned out that the 'Tubas' were a plate of two mochi shaped like the aforementioned instrument. He had to admit they were a very dedicated theme cafe.

Hitoshi tried to look at the counter out of the corner of his eye. If he was going to oogle the man, who didn't know he was one of his many 'boyfriends,' he was at least going to do it subtly. He was still mortified at how they responded to hearing his name, but what was he supposed to do? Say 'Ch4rgeb0lt' and freak him out? It felt weird to call an actual person by their online moniker.

 _Better a laugh than a horrified scream, at least._

He grabbed a stick of Takoyaki and bit into one. "Mm, this is really good."

Asui nodded, "we can actually come back for the food and not just the eye candy."

The meal was finished quickly, with a lot less talking once they found out how tasty it was, and both "Tubas" were soon eaten. Tsuyu was _still_ mouthing off about his "embarrassing overtures" - and he was sure her musical pun was intended- by the time they were done.

Shinsou gave her a pleading look, "If I pay the bill will you shut up?"

Asui stuck her tongue out (further), "Not a chance, but you can get it anyway."

Shinsou caved and pulled out his wallet. Tsuyu grabbed his card, with an unfortunate familiarity, and waved it at the waitress. Which Hitoshi would have thought was rude but apparently Mina was just happy to be summoned.

The woman sashayed over and piled their plates in that impressive manner only waitresses seem able to do. "Can I get you two cuties anything else?"

Tsuyu batted her long lashes, "A few more compliments would be nice."

Mina laughed, "Well that's easy to do, but I think what you really want is something else." Then the pink woman leaned forward and whispered to the both of them, "His _actual_ name is Denki and you made a great first impression, Mr. Yes Cat."


	4. Chapter 4

Shinsou sped to the entrance the second he got his credit card back and kept his eyes on the floor the whole time. He was pretty sure he could never return to this tainted place after that. Hitoshi might have ruined his relationship with Denki for the rest of his life. Or at least that's what his anxiety was telling him.

Tsuyu followed him out, at a normal pace, and waved to all the staff as she left. They chorused various version of "goodbye!" as she walked out the door.

She saw Hitoshi had already turned the corner and was waiting for her out of view of the cafe window. She looked infinitely unimpressed but he didn't care. At this rate he wasn't sure if he could even face (so to speak) Denki on the stream later. Shinsou buried his face in his hands and didn't look up until he felt Tsuyu poke him.

"Come on, _King Yes Cat_ . Let's leave this social crime scene."

Hitoshi groaned into his hands, "You don't understand. I am actually going to die. Literally. Aren't you supposed to be a hero? Don't you have a 'First, Do No Harm' rule or something?"

When he finally uncovered his face he saw the frog girl smirking, "The 'Primum Non Nocere' rule is only for doctors, and I did save you. We got his correct name, didn't we?"

"You had nothing to do with that," the purple-haired man deadpanned.

Tsuyu scoffed, "If I wasn't so hot that waitress wouldn't have said anything to you."

Shinsou would concede that might be true, but he certainly wasn't going to vocalize it.

The pro-hero hooked his arm with hers and lead him down the street. "Do I need to drop you off at your dads' place?"

He hated that everyone who met him knew, sometimes instinctively, that he was a total daddy's boy. Doubly so, if they were aware that he had two of them.

"You don't have to drop me off anywhere. I'm not a child. How do you know I'm even seeing them this week?"

The frog hero raised an eyebrow, "Well, are you?"

"...Yes."

Tsuyu smirked, "That's what I thought. Let's get you to my dear old sensei's house!"

Shinsou always felt a bit weird that his new friends had been taught by his father, but he tried not to let it show.

He answered with a bitter, "He thought you were a horrible student, by the way."

The frog girl laughed, "You're a horrible liar," and then pushed him in the direction of his father's house, "Tell Aizawa-sensei I said hi."

Shinsou would, but that didn't mean he had to like it.

The tall man fished his parent's house key from his bag. He was excited to see them but his day had taken enough of a toll that he didn't feel emotionally prepared for Hizashi's over-enthusiastic mother hen attitude. He'd miss Ch4rgeb0lt's stream tonight too, but maybe that's exactly what he needed.

It had been three days since he'd last seen his father and papa, which Yamada considered way too long and Aizawa considered way too short (though he knew the old man was bluffing when he said it). Shinsou could already guess how the evening would go: Hizashi will have either made dinner or Shouta will have preemptively ordered take-out because he knows Shinsou loves the Chinese restaurant nearby. Then, both parents will take turns grilling him about his job, his lack of a love life, his friends/their old students, and whether or not he's been taking care of himself. One of them will then give a pep talk and remind him he was loved (which always made Hitoshi feel better, even though he already knew they did). They might even tell him some amusing hero or teacher stories if he asks, and that never failed to make him appreciate his fourth graders. After that, Yamada would insist he stay over, Aizawa would tell his husband that "the boy can make his own decisions," and then Shinsou would either cave to his papa's puppy eyes and stay the night or escape while his dad kept the other man distracted.

He slotted the key into the lock and heard his papa's heavy footsteps coming to the door. When he opened it Hizashi was already waiting for him in the hall.

He guessed they had food ordered in since his papa wasn't wearing his apron with "Don't kiss the cook. This is a kitchen and that's unsanitary" written on it.

Aizawa always gets his family the best birthday gifts.

Hizashi outstretched his arms, "Our baby is home!"

Shinsou muttered, "I am 25 years old," but he knew it would be ignored. As always.

"Come inside! We've got dinner all fixed up." The blonde hugged him and added, in a louder voice than before, "your _father_ got greasy take-out because apparently he doesn't want our growing boy to eat healthy food."

Shinsou chuckled into the man's shoulder. He'd always wondered how Japan would respond if they saw what these two famous heroes were like at home. Bickering over dinner and passive-aggressively loving each other in front of their spoiled child.

Hizashi pulled his son into the apartment and locked the door behind them. Shinsou took off his shoes as he was dragged down the small hallway. Their house wasn't messy, per se, but it was cluttered. His father was a packrat and his papa seemed to own every CD released in the last forty years.

They refused, despite Shinsou begging them, to paint over the part of the living room wall where he'd drawn a family portrait of them when he was a child. He was always surprised his finger painting was so resilient, but Hitoshi suspected his papa had sprayed some sort of protective coating to keep it in embarrassingly mint condition. The stick figure with the cockatoo hair was inaccurately shorter than the one who had scribbles around his neck (emulating the man's binding cloth, he supposed) which Aizawa appreciated. Shinsou's drawing of himself had arms of unproportionate length holding onto the stick arms of his fathers. When he was a teenager Shouta used to threaten him that he'd show his, admittedly few, friends his 'art' if he didn't keep his room clean.

Needless to say, Shinsou's room stayed spotless.

Aizawa was waiting for them both by the dinner table. His black pants and t-shirt were as creative as his style usually was, and clashed terribly with his papa's striped button-up and jeans. Looking at the two of them you might think they were an unsuccessful comedy duo. Which, in retrospect, wasn't entirely inaccurate.

Multiple containers of chop suey, sweet and sour chicken, general tso's, and dumplings littered the table. Delicate china plates were laid out- they had to appease Hizashi's desire for cultured eating somehow- and small cups full of rice had been placed next to them.

Shinsou sat down cross-legged beside his father and leaned over to embrace him. As a kid he always squeezed Aizawa a little harder than necessary just to annoy him, but the man had become fond of that and now it was a ritual. He buried his head into his father's shoulder. He smelled like smoke and Shinsou hoped it was from a fire quirk at school or his papa would have a fit.

The black haired man let go of the hug and grunted, "Alright. Enough affection. Eat your food before it gets cold."

Hizashi was already dividing portions of each type across the three plates, and the smell must have attracted the cats because Shinsou felt one headbutt his arm.

"No cats at the table!" Yamada shouted, far too loudly but the other two men were well used to it by now. Just to make a point, Aizawa lifted the cat up and plopped it onto Shinsou's lap- his eyes staring down his husband's as he did. Which prompted Hizashi to use his chopsticks to grab at the dark haired man's nose, while the annoyed cat stuck his head in Hitoshi's rice. Their second cat was already under the table stalking a fallen dumpling.

When they rescued the two pets his dad had joked that he would name them after his "most difficult" students due to their strong personalities; the particularly angry cat would be called Bakugou, and the one it constantly attacked would be called Midoriya. Unfortunately for Aizawa these more humorous names stuck and now that meant the number one and two heroes were fighting over Chinese food at his dinner table. It also made it incredibly strange to be friends with one of them and not think his cat had grown thumbs everytime he got a text from Izuku.

He decided he would help with creating a ceasefire. "Bakugou has his head in the rice, and Midoriya just ran away with a dumpling."

Hizashi turned around quickly and grabbed Midoriya by the tail. He snatched the shredded dumpling from it's little jaws. Their Bakugou cat had clearly understood what was said because he hauled his furry ass out of the dining room with his face covered in grains of rice.

His father watched the cat run into the bedroom. "Just leave it. Bakugou is a lost cause."

Shinsou arched an eyebrow, "Are you talking about your old student or the cat?"

Aizawa shrugged, "Both."

They tucked back into their food and it wasn't long before Hizashi started the expected line of questioning.

"How are your little terrors?"

Shinsou and Aizawa answered at the same time, "Cute but obnoxious."

Yamada tugged affectionately on his husband's hair, "You know full well I was asking Hitoshi."

Aizawa stuck to his guns, "You mentioned terrors. It was reflex."

Their son snorted, "the kids are fine. I had to separate Toga and Stain again. She bit his arm, transformed into his appearance, and slapped Dabi in the face. Once Dabi fully turned around she'd already changed back and the kid went charging after Stain thinking he'd been the one to do it. I had to pull out the fire extinguisher...again."

Both of his parents nodded in sympathy. High schoolers weren't that different from 4th graders from the stories he'd heard them tell.

"Was that Tomura kid still happy just to watch the world burn?" Hizashi asked.

Shinsou groaned before emotionally shoving some sweet and sour chicken into his mouth. "When isn't he?"

Cat Bakugou crawled into Aizawa's lap to wait for food to fall, and this time nobody tried to stop him.

"Parent-Teacher Conferences are coming up this week. I'm not looking forward to it but the real problem..." Hitoshi looked to his parents pleadingly, "What the hell am I supposed to do with the Todoroki family?"

Aizawa looked at him with pity, "The same thing I did. Quietly hate his father and make numerous calls to child services. After that you can loudly hate his father because it would look bad on him if he attacked you for it."

 _My dad is a genius._

"Besides," Hizashi added, "he might not even show up."

Shinsou hadn't considered that very real possibility and it made him feel better- as much as it made him feel bad for Dabi. He'd never met the kid's mother but she'd have to be a goddamn saint to put up with Endeavor.

Aizawa gestured to Hitoshi with his chopsticks, "You'll be fine. Just remember you only have to have a serious conversation with them twice a year. All you need to say is a general report of their kid's behavior, scholastic ability, and some throw-away lines about them being a good classmate...which means you'll have to think of a nice way to say how annoying the troublemakers have been." He paused to think, "But it also depends on the parents. If they know better you don't have to pretend. The Bakugou family, for example, would have kicked me out if I tried to tell them their son played well with others."

Shinsou was convinced the cat version of Bakugou knew what they were talking about because he started to scratch at Aizawa's face. His dad carefully detached the cat's claws from his hair and fed him some rice to pacify the little monster. It immediately settled down in his lap to rest. His dad really was the cat whisperer.

"Speaking of playing well with others…" Hizashi started.

And here we go.

"...do I need to know about a special person in your life?" He then gave an uncomfortable wink. One that was a bit too telling.

Hitoshi was terrified his papa might have found out. The way he spoke implied something had given him away.

"You don't need to know anything about it."

Aizawa turned to him, "then that means there is a someone?"

Fuck.

Nobody would guess his dad was just as nosy as his papa, but he was impressively intrusive when it came to his kid.

"There's no one. When has there ever been? Even if hypothetically there was somebody, I've totally blown my chances."

His dad replied with his usual deadpan, "I guess there really isn't anyone since your argument is so incredibly convincing."

"So who am I hypothetically meeting?" Hizashi looked over the moon. Shinsou really should have kept his mouth shut.

"Nobody. It wouldn't work out. Besides, I'm trying to focus on being a teacher."

Yamada laughed, "So were we but then I finally asked your dad out."

Shinsou loved to hear the story of how his parents got together and later adopted him. He used to make them tell it to him every night. The short version was that they met in school, and Hizashi did his best to attach himself to his future husband despite the man's wishes. They became friends over time, and on the day they graduated Hizashi proposed.

Aizawa said no.

The blonde took that as, "Yes, and you should constantly ask me to marry you for the next year until I cave and realize how hopelessly I am in love with you." Which, thankfully, turned out to be exactly what happened. After they were married they both worked as pro-heroes. Aizawa did teaching on the side- he'd started with grade schoolers like his son now did- while Hizashi split his time between heroics and his radio show. Being with children every day made Shouta aware of how poorly some kids were being treated. Behind his husband's back, he'd started to look through foster websites. It wasn't long before Aizawa landed on a four year old Hitoshi, and it took him minutes to email his husband with an attachment (a picture of the application already filled out) and the words "deal with it" written in the subject line.

In the purple-haired man's opinion, it was the perfect love story.

Shinsou's experience with Ch4rgeb0lt... Denki ... wasn't exactly as romantic. The blonde still barely knew who he was. With his luck he'd just forever be viewed as the socially incompetent latte drinker who called him by an overly familiar nickname.

Hitoshi fiddled with his hands as he asked his parents, "Before you were dating, did you ever do something stupid?"

Hizashi practically cackled, "Is that a serious question?"

"No, I mean...Did one of you ever make a fool of yourself in front of the other?"

The two answered in unison, both pointing to their opposite partner. "Yes."

"Frequently," Aizawa added.

Shinsou kept his eyes on the plate of chop suey in front of him, "so if I did something really embarrassing it doesn't mean that this hypothetical person will hate me forever?"

His papa looked aghast, "Of course not, everyone loves you! Who could possibly hate you?"

"All the other kids from my school years?" Shinsou mumbled. "Besides, you two don't count. You're my parents. You have to love me."

Aizawa put a warm hand on his son's shoulder, "Do I have to remind you that Endeavor is a parent too? I love you dearly, but that isn't just because I'm your dad. I love you because you are a smart and wonderful kid who bragged about me so much in grade school that your teacher had to call me and ask that I make you stop."

His papa came over- with cats unhappily grabbed and tucked under each arm that he then dropped into Shinsou's lap- and wrapped himself around his loved ones. "You are so precious to us. Never forget that."

"Thanks, dads. I love you too." Aizawa ruffled his hair in response when Shinsou added, "and for the record, I still talk about you too much but the ones listening are your old students so they love it."

Aizawa looked like he wanted to tell him not to, but he kindly avoided the scolding. Now wasn't the right time to tease him. "How often do you see all of them?"

Shinsou put his chopsticks down, before shrugging, "I see them every now and then. I ate lunch with Tsuyu earlier. She says hi, by the way."

Aizawa spoke firmly, "Don't tell her I said hi back. Let her feel unloved. It'll build character."

"Tell her I said hi!" Hizashi shouted- way too close to their ears. Even the cats scattered at the sound.

The three settled back down into their respective seats and began to clear the table. Once the dishes were washed and dried, his papa turned to him for the final expected move of the night. Shinsou braced himself.

Hizashi was utilizing his impressive puppy eyes, "Are you sure you don't want to stay over? I made your bed just in case. We can make you breakfast before you go to school!"

"He's a grown man now, Hizashi. The boy can make his own decisions."

"I have to grade papers, papa. I'll stay over next time, okay?"

Hizashi pouted but accepted it anyway. "At least let me walk you to the door?"

"It is 30 feet away at most."

The blonde man smiled, "so that's a yes?"

Shinsou laughed and grabbed his bag from where he'd dropped it. He was down the hall and putting his shoes on when Yamada handed him some money.

"Do something that makes you happy, okay? Get yourself a treat. Maybe go out for dinner with that hypothetical someone? You deserve to have somebody who cares for you as much as you will them. You've got a big heart, Hitoshi. Share it." He gave his son one last hug, kissing his head despite the floof of hair in his way, and finally let him walk out the door.

His papa always had a way with words and he knew it. What Yamada didn't know was that his loving speech had translated into: "You should shell out some cash for a 1-on-1 stream with your cute not-boyfriend."

Shinsou smiled and carefully folded the money into his pocket. He certainly wasn't feeling that bad about parent-teacher conferences anymore.


	5. Chapter 5

Shinsou let out a low sigh as the last of his students left for the day. Tomorrow was Parent-Teacher Conferences and he had no idea how he was supposed to spin the four particularly difficult students' behavior in a positive light.

The day had been incredibly hectic. His train had been late so he stumbled into class just fast enough to catch Tomura trying to decompose the class pet. The hamster that had been named after one of Japan's best former heroes. Shinsou never thought the day would come where he'd have to yell "No! We do not decay All Might!"

Then a student with a weak static quirk shorted his laptop, but he forgave her instantly because she was both sweet and reminded him too much of someone special.

Hitoshi really did have it bad if it was starting to make him like specific children more.

He'd had to rely on discussion instead of visual presentation, which was hard for the students who were mostly visual learners. Many of them had cell phones that they offered to look things up on, but Shinsou knew that would only distract them from the lesson. A lot of kids prefer something more interactive and attention-grabbing than a tired guy describing what historical characters looked like. ("No, Chizome, I will not draw a picture of Nobunaga Oda.")

The only thing holding him together was the knowledge that, shortly after leaving his parents' house, he had been officially approved for a 1-on-1 stream with Ch4rgeb0lt for the evening. Not everyone's application was accepted, it took time away from the man's usual streaming schedule so he did it sparingly, and that made him feel a lot more confident about spending time with the blonde.

If he thought about it too much he worried that he'd psych himself out of it, so he focused on the things he had to do right now.

One of which was to stop himself from returning to Amped Up.

The temptation to see Denki in real life had been eating at him all day. It wasn't enough that he'd spend an evening alone with him because that wasn't the same as mortifying himself in front of the living and breathing form of his biggest crush.

He would even accept being greeted with 'Yes Cat' as long as it brought a smile to the blonde's face. Which, judging by yesterday's interaction, it definitely would. It would also make his co-workers lose their shit laughing, but he'd put up with that just to drink another latte made by Ch4rgeb0lt.

Sometimes Shinsou couldn't help but feel a bit creepy for thinking about him so much. Though his obsession hadn't been as bad before actually meeting the man. Now it was all he could think about and that made it difficult to teach history while simultaneously stopping a kid from gluing his classmate to a chair. The odds that only his class would be the one with a human glue stick seemed reasonable after the other brats he had. At least he had a reason to be sticky, unlike some other students.

At this time tomorrow he would be sitting down with parent after parent and answering the same question- all of them being thinly veiled versions of 'but my kid is the best/your favorite/the strongest right?' Shinsou was tempted to just start saying yes to every one of them if that'd stop it.

He didn't play favorites, though there were always some students he enjoyed teaching more than others, and he was frustrated how often he had to remind a parent of that. As far as Endeavor goes he plans to be as passive-aggressive as possible while not doing anything that might endanger Dabi. Which was a very fine line.

While shoving stacks of paper into their proper places, Hitoshi felt his phone buzz in his back pocket. Knowing his friends it could only be one of three people unless it was his dad sending him photos of the cats.

He looked at the screen and smiled. He loved being right.

 **Uraraka:** Tsuyu is wearing an adorable green dress today please send help.

 **Uraraka:** I tried to compliment her but ended up saying the weather is nice.

 **Uraraka:** Be the hero your dad I know you are and teach me how to flirt with her.

Shinsou snorted at the image of Ochako standing in front of the frog girl and discussing the cloudy weather while utilizing finger guns ineffectively. She was as much of a disaster gay as he was.

 **You:** Are you seriously asking me for flirting advice?

 **You:** The last date I went on was with someone who didn't realize we were on a date.

 **Uraraka:** Well, I can't exactly ask Tsuyu's advice and Midoriya only ended up in a relationship because his boyfriend declared war on him and he misunderstood the situation.

 **You:** There he is. Our nation's number one hero. Getting threats and dates all in the same sentence.

There was a long pause afterward and Shinsou worried he'd insulted their friend too much, but then Ochako texted back.

 **Uraraka:** She asked me out for coffee! Is this a date? What do I wear? Oh gosh, I can't change because we're going out now.

 **You:** Never change, Ochako.

 **Uraraka:** You're such a dick.

The purple-haired man wondered if the cafe she mentioned was Amped Up, and had to restrain himself from blowing Uraraka's cover and asking Tsuyu directly. Not that he would infringe on their maybe-date. The cafe was close enough to UA that it wouldn't take them long to arrive. Perhaps he could convince Ochako to buy him a 'Tuba'. If he did, he would say it with no context and let her flounder at his request for a brass instrument.

Friendship was great.

Almost as good as trying not to hyperventilate about his own date tonight. 'Date' might be a strong word but he paid more than enough money to call it whatever the hell he wanted. Shinsou knew it would be worth it either way.

By the time he had gotten home, Hitoshi had managed to calm down. He had plenty of time before Ch4rgeb0lt and him would talk, and he planned on distracting himself until it was too late to go back on his word. He looked like a mess and was incredibly glad the visual part of the stream only went one-way.

Ochako's frequent updates kept him feeling better about his own (lack of) flirting skills. So far she had managed to spill coffee on the table and went to hand Tsuyu the salt but ended up banging the shaker against the other girl's tongue.

The highlight of his day, thus far, had been when Asui texted him.

 **Tsuyu:** Your boyfriend is here.

 **Tsuyu:** You know…" Denks" .

 **Tsuyu:** He asked about you.

 **Tsuyu:** Well, technically he asked about 'Captain Yes Cat' but I figured nobody else held your title.

 **Tsuyu:** I'd say he seemed disappointed you weren't here but he was pretty busy helping Ochako pick up the loose change she'd dropped when she pulled her wallet out upside down.

She knows I'm buying drinks so I'm not sure why she brought it out in the first place. She's a serious wreck today.

Considering Tsuyu wouldn't believe him he felt it was safe to be more honest than Ochako would probably appreciate.

 **You:** Maybe she's blinded by her love for you.

 **Tsuyu:** If she was into me I'd know.

 **Tsuyu:** I think you forgot that I'm the love master.

 **You:** Never call yourself that ever again.

 **Tsuyu:** Fair.

 **You:** Would it be weird if I asked you to say hi to Denki for me?

 **Tsuyu:** Yes.

Shinsou supposed he'd be put off if a stranger texted another person and told them to say hello to him. Damn.

 **You:** Whatever. Enjoy your date .

 **Tsuyu:** If you keep that up I will exclusively refer to myself as the love master for the rest of our friendship.

 **You:** Sounds like a great way to end our friendship.

Their texts were quickly interrupted by one entirely in caps lock.

 **Uraraka:** STOP KEEPING TSU'S ATTENTION AWAY FROM ME. THANKS.

It was pretty bad form to talk to either of them during a possible date. He knew exactly how to fix it. He pulled up Tsuyu's number.

 **You:** Stop ignoring your girlfriend. She texted me to ask that you pay her more attention.

 **You:** Great job, "love master".

He never got a response from Tsuyu, but either way she better bring him back a strawberry Tuba.

Shinsou had grabbed his ritualistic Cup Noodles, was comfortably sat on his squishy couch, and definitely not shaking. He'd been staring at the login screen for Ch4rgeb0lt's stream for the last ten minutes. He didn't want to be too early and look desperate but he also didn't want to be late. Could one be fashionably late to a stream? Considering the amount of money that went into this he should get every second he could.

His clock read two minutes to 9 PM. Two minutes was close enough for him to not look like he'd been thinking about it nonstop the whole day, right? Shinsou typed his username and password before watching the streaming site load.

It was the same layout as usual, but the chat box was empty- which he'd never seen before. It would even stay empty unless he wrote something.

No pressure.

Suddenly, the feed went live and Denki sat there- wearing an unfairly tight purple shirt- already nibbling on a fancy brand of noodles.

The blonde lit up upon seeing he was already logged on. "Hey, dude! I bought healthy ramen tonight in your honor. Earlier I even had orange juice- but way earlier because ugh I'm not putting those two flavors together- so I can fight off that impending scurvy you mentioned. See? Your money goes to good use!"

Shinsou blinked in shock.

 _I'm surprised you remember that._

"Well, duh. You're definitely one of my favorites!"

 _You say that to everyone._

Ch4geb0lt threw his head back and laughed, "Alright, you caught me! Only sometimes, though. When it comes to you I actually mean it. You're special. I love when you talk about your job, and you always make the funniest jokes." The blonde's brow furrowed, "I sort of worry that others in the chat are starting to realize that I always answer your comments but not necessarily everyone else's."

Hearing that made Shinsou unreasonably happy. He hadn't considered Ch4rgeb0lt's response rate but now that the blonde mentioned it he really did pay extra attention to him.

 _I wouldn't worry. It's probably not an issue since I never even noticed it._

Ch4rgeb0lt smirked at the camera, "I don't know. You totally strike me as an oblivious guy when it comes to things like that. Er...if you are a guy? I just got the sense that you were, but I know I shouldn't assume gender identity and stuff."

 _No, you got it right. What gave it away?_

The blonde gave an innocent but toothy grin, "Just how emotionally stunted your replies are."

 _...What?_

Ch4geb0lt backpedaled nervously, "Just kidding! I mean, they kind of are but you actually convey a ton of feeling for someone who writes in a sarcastic deadpan style. Props to you, bro!"

 _Um, thanks?_

"Shoot," the blonde looked contrite, "I totally fucked up with that joke. Do you want a refund?"

Ch4rgeb0lt was way too thoughtful. The teasing hadn't even been that bad but at the slightest show of unhappiness the man was willing to give him back the ample amount he'd paid. It was a horrible way to run a business, but Shinsou guessed that's probably why he works another job. He was just too nice to take advantage of lonely people.

 _No, it's fine. I like talking with you._

The blonde immediately stopped looking so distraught and sighed into his ramen in relief.

"Cool, I was worried I upset you and I totally don't ever want to do that. Promise me that you'll call me out on it if I do?"

 _I promise. Don't worry. But I do have to say that you are a seriously terrible businessman._

Ch4rgeb0lt nodded in a resigned fashion, "Yeah. My friends keep telling me I should raise prices and shorten stream times, but I'd feel bad about it. They also think I should incorporate a variety of sex acts so I usually don't take their advice, haha."

Shinsou carefully keeps it to himself that he would absolutely be okay with that idea. Though, on second thought, he wouldn't want to share that part of his 'boyfriend' with other people.

 _A lot of people in the chat say that stuff too._

"Yeah, but unless they get particularly pushy about it I just let it go," Ch4rgeb0lt slurped his healthier noodles loudly, "though if money gets extra tight maybe I should offer special shows to long term viewers!" The blonde gave the camera an exaggerated wink.

Shinsou was torn. If he said yes it'd be creepy, and if he said no it'd be offensive...

 _I feel like any answer I could give to that is a trap._

Ch4rgeb0lt snickered, "Nah. Money would have to get really bad. Like, if I lost my barista job levels of bad. But I've got some super sick foam art skills that would blow your mind so I think I'll be okay."

Shinsou couldn't help himself from asking:

 _Can you draw cats?_

The blonde's eyes lit up, "Yeah! This super cute guy came in the other day and wanted me to do one. He didn't say anything about it, but I think I did a pretty good job!"

Shinsou's mind was a loop of "he said I'm cute he said I'm cute he said I'm cute" but he pulled himself together enough to type an answer.

 _I'm sure it was a very good cat. He was probably just shy._

"I dunno. The guy had that too-cool-for-you look to him, but he called me by the wrong name and it was the most adorable thing ever…" the blonde shook his head, "Wait, this is about you not him! It's in bad taste to talk about another man when I'm having a date with my boyfriend."

Though he loved to hear him say 'boyfriend,' Shinsou felt a bit guilty about lying. If only Ch4rgeb0lt knew he was talking to the same guy.

"So let's talk about you! Wait, I should clarify, am I your boyfriend or your best friend? I better be one of those!"

Shinsou desperately wanted to say boyfriend, but then thought about the truth and grimaced.

 _You're a stranger on the internet who I pay to like me._

"Hey! Don't discredit yourself like that," Denki wagged his finger at the camera, "I don't say yes to everybody who wants a private session, you know. I meant it when I said you were special." The blonde looked sincere and spoke with more seriousness than Shinsou had ever seen him do. It felt nice to be worth someone's time.

"I was sorta hoping that you'd say boyfriend but I should have known you'd have a clever comeback instead."

It made Shinsou's heart speed up to hear Ch4rgeb0lt would even entertain the idea of dating him. Though he doubted the man would feel the same way if they really got to know each other. Not to mention if he knew about his quirk. That's how it always went.

Though that did bring up a new question.

 _What would happen if you actually got a boyfriend in real life?_

Ch4rgeb0lt paused to consider it, "I guess I never really thought about it. I've only ever been on a couple of 'real life' dates. I tend to leave a really bad impression!"

 _That doesn't make any sense. If you left a bad impression you wouldn't be making bank on the internet every night._

"Bro, you are way too sweet!" The smaller man laughed and pressed a hand to his heart. "It's different when it's online, though. It's way easier to be myself with people who I don't have to look in the eye. I feel really nervous and awkward in front of most people, much less someone cute, but somehow this stream is a safe space."

 _I get what you mean. I don't think I'd be able to say any of the things I have if it was 'real life'._

"Oh? Are you shy like that cute cat-latte boy?" The blonde winked again.

Shinsou couldn't stop himself from laughing.

 _Yeah. Something like that._

Ch4rgeb0lt's eye's lit up, "Ooh, you should tell me what you look like!"

 _Nothing special._

"Booo! You've gotta be able to do better than that. How about we play twenty questions except I ask whatever number I want?"

 _It's your stream._

"Nuh-uh. Tonight is _your_ stream, remember?"

 _If you really want to then I'll do my best to answer._

Denki grinned, "Awesome! Let's see...why did you become a teacher?"

 _My dad is a teacher. It's lame but he's my hero and I wanted to be like him. As I got older I found I actually really liked it._

"Huh, and here I thought all my viewers had daddy issues."

Shinsou almost inhaled a noodle.

 _I'm going to tell everyone on the chat you said that._

Yellow eyes went wide, "No way! This stream is like Vegas. Whatever happens stays here!"

 _I'll let it slide If I can ask you questions back._

Ch4rgeb0lt looked thoughtful, "Well that's only fair. It's your turn then. Shoot!"

 _Why did you decide to be a cam boy?_

"When you say it like that it sounds so bad! I prefer professional friend, thank you very much." Denki went for another slurp of ramen before continuing, "one of my best buds- who is a big shot hero by the way, but I can't tell you who- said that I'm good at being around people and making them feel at ease. I didn't really believe him but one day I met this kid crying on the street and started talking to him. I wanted to make him feel better so I started joking around and it totes worked! The little guy told me I should talk to more people, and I thought 'all the people in the world are online' so I brought it here. Originally it was just a chat but people kept saying they liked seeing me cause it felt like I was with them. So now...I am here!" The blonde then posed like All Might to really hammer the impression home.

Shinsou always knew that Ch4geb0lt was a kind soul. He only took vacations from streaming if he was doing a 1-on-1 or if he had a personal emergency. Hell, he was considerate enough to realize the holidays are some of the hardest times to be alone so he always has special free streams, where people would end up frequently donating much more than usual in response. Somebody once asked, "but what about your family?" and Denki smiled at the camera before answering, "I'm with 'em right now!"

It was little things like that which made Hitoshi like him even more.

 _I was expecting something more mercenary. You're a good kid._

"You think I'm a kid, eh? So are you some forty-something divorcee with two children and a mortgage?"

 _We're probably not that far in age. I'm 25._

Ch4rgeb0lts eyes went wide, "25? You're only a year older than me? Go out and live! I thought you were at least mid-thirties from the way you talk. If you're that young you could totally still be spending time with friends at school or whatever."

 _I do sometimes. I like talking to you more. We only spend an hour together anyway. Plenty of time for me to do other things._

The blonde looked as concerned as he did touched. "I still think you should spend more time in the real world. Hugs and kisses are way better in 3-D. What's stopping you? YOLO, right?"

 _Maybe, but I like having you to come home to._

Shinsou realized how awkward that sounded a second after he hit the enter key.

 _I mean, not in a weird way. The school day is long and I like your company._

Denki beamed. He must have said the right thing. It was a nice look on the blonde.

"You know what, MindWash? I like coming home to you too."


	6. Chapter 6

That night Shinsou slept better than he had in years, and he couldn't help but assume it was because he'd been talking with Ch4rgeb0lt. They had continued to ask each other questions and chatted about nothing: favorite colors, hobbies, embarrassing stories, tales of their individual crazy family members, and what their best friends are like (Shinsou learned that apparently Kaminari is friends with a lot of UA graduates, but he was vague about which ones. Maybe Midoriya knew him? First seeing him at the cafe, and now him knowing his schoolmates? What a small world).

Ch4rgeb0lt continued to be as sweet as he was funny and their time together had flown by. So much so that when the blonde realized they had gone over the intended hour he became flustered and assured Hitoshi he'd done it on purpose, "Since you've been such a good repeat customer!" Shinsou was happy that the man had obviously lost track of time. The blonde even made him promise that he'd buy another 1-on-1 stream in the future so they could chat again. Shinsou had mentioned teaching didn't make him enough money for that, and the cam boy had hinted that Hitoshi would get a heavily discounted price.

Finally, Ch4rgeb0lt gave his signature finger kiss to the webcam, and Shinsou reveled in the fact that _this_ kiss was for him alone. He kissed his own cold fingers and pressed them against the screen where Ch4rgeb0lt's lips were. It made his cheeks feel warm in the best way.

Once he shut down his laptop he hugged it tightly against his chest and kept an embarrassing squeal from leaving his throat.

 _Blessed be the internet and all its many gifts._

Shinsou wondered if he could get away with telling his papa he had spent the money on dinner with a cute friend. Either way, it was worth every penny.

Normally, on the nights before parent-teacher conferences, the purple-haired man would spend the next couple of hours anxiously psyching himself up for the grueling meetings, but he was in such a good mood that his brain said "fuck it" and let him fall into a deep and restful sleep.

Not even the promise of a day spent placating 20 parents could ruin his night.

The wasn't enough coffee on the planet for Shinsou to feel prepared to deal with these meetings come morning. Some parts of the experience were actually pretty fun- seeing what sort of people spawned the adorable brats he taught was always interesting- and usually the children's guardians are well-mannered and obliging.

All it took was one really dreadful family member to make the entire day horrible, and Shinsou was sitting right in front of one.

"You see, Todoroki-san, Dabi is a very talented child-"

The fire bearded man interrupted him with a huff, "Of course he is."

Shinsou continued, "Even with the many difficulties he has to face every day-"

Enji looked scornfully at his son, "Difficulties?"

"Yes," Hitoshi drawled, "Like having trouble at home and a severe chronic lack of parental support. You know, just the crucial things that people should instinctively understand are important."

Endeavor stood from his chair angrily before his daughter (standing in for the boy's mother, Shinsou supposed) pulled the fiery man back down hissing, "Father! At least not in front of the others."

Hitoshi knew he was safe. This was school territory and a much too public place for a famous man to throw a tantrum. Endeavor couldn't afford the bad publicity, especially after losing his number one spot to heroes at least half his age. Plus, if Shinsou was obnoxious enough he hoped that would take attention away from Dabi, so the kid didn't have to suffer his father's wrath after they got home.

Shinsou saw the little boy's eyes widen with glee. He didn't know if Dabi had ever seen someone give sass to his dad's face before, but the little bastard was certainly enjoying it.

Enji sat tall in his chair, fuming in a literal and figurative sense. "I see this school believes in hiring rabble, despite its reputation for producing well-rounded children."

Hitoshi couldn't stop himself, "As I said, your son is doing very well here, and if you ever figure out what a hug looks like he might do even better." Before the man could respond Shinsou pulled his student's file from his desk and handed it to the shocked looking young woman. "Here are any further details on your brother's progress and academic abilities. I'm handing them to you because I imagine you're the only one who will read them."

Enji sneered viciously but kept himself in the chair. "I think I've had enough of this conference, Shinsou- _Sensei_."

"I couldn't agree more, Todoroki-san."

Endeavor leaned over the desk to whisper, "Don't think I'll forget this slight, boy."

"Gosh, it sure is scary to hear that from the number one hero...oh, sorry. Number three now, isn't it?" Hitoshi proceeded to give his best impression of an Aizawa-grin.

The taller man slammed a flaming hand on the desk, scorching a fist shape into the wood. Then he got up and strode out of the room without any regard for his family. His clearly stressed daughter clapped her hands together loudly. "Well, It's been lovely talking with you, Shinsou-sensei. Thank you for looking after my brother." She quickly bowed low and rushed to follow her father.

Right after the rest of his family had walked through the door, Dabi slowed to a stop. He walked up to Shinsou and stood silently in front of him, before extending his fist and waiting. Hitoshi bumped his own fist against the boy's, and watched bloom the first happy smile he'd ever seen on the Todoroki kid's face, "Thanks, teach."

Shinsou smiled back, "You really are doing well, Dabi. Keep up the good work." The boy nodded and ran off to catch up with his unpleasant family.

It was moments like those that reasserted Shinsou's love of being a teacher. He also had a feeling Dabi would act out a lot less in future classes, but that wasn't why he stood up to his piece of shit father. He'd definitely have to text Aizawa about this later. His dad will be proud for sure.

Hitoshi would also need a new desk, but that was to be expected.

The purple-haired man had made it through most of his roster. Only a few more families and he could call it a day. Getting out so late meant he didn't have to wait long to see Ch4rgeb0lt's nightly stream, and after the day he'd had he couldn't wait to log on and tell the blonde how he'd gotten to yell at a dreadful parent.

That was still the future, however, and meanwhile he had students to see. Shinsou looked down at his attendance sheet to see what family was next when he heard a gasp.

"Oh snap! It's Mr. Yes Cat!"

The purple-haired man looked up and was greeted with an adorably dressed Ch4rgeb0lt looking shocked and happy all at once. It was pretty fucking cute, but that didn't mean he couldn't keep his cool. He had to look good in front of the man, after all.

He cleared his throat before rising and extending his hand out for a shake, "It's Shinsou- _sensei_ actually."

Denki shook his hand and smiled, but still gave him a look that implied he was going to do whatever he wanted anyway. "Oh right, you did tell me your name, didn't you? But there's no way I'm going to remember it after the great cat debacle. Dude, I put that story on my Instagram and it got a bazillion likes."

"Great. I'm positively overjoyed to hear you've spread my embarrassment to more than just your hipster cafe."

The blonde whined, "Hey! Come on, it was cute!"

Shinsou's student, Pika, started to beat her fists against Kaminari's leg. "Den, stop talking to sensei like that!" Denki answered her by sticking his tongue out, which the girl quickly imitated back at him. The resemblance was astounding- right down to the little black bolt in the girl's hair.

It took a moment for it to hit Shinsou, "I didn't realize I've been teaching your child."

"What, her?" The older blonde hooked an arm around the wiggling little girl's waist and dropped himself into the chair across Hitoshi, pulling the child up onto his lap right afterwards. "No way! She is 100% my big sister's kid. Well, I guess she's 50%? Cause she has a dad. Somewhere. We think. My big sis always has work so I'm basically her not-dad."

Shinsou tried not to feel too relieved. It wasn't like he'd stop liking the man if he _did_ have a daughter, but he wasn't ready for fatherhood. Being a teacher was one thing, but being a dad?

At the very least he hoped he'd be like Aizawa if it ever happens.

"Do you share your sister's last name or are you not Kaminari Denki?"

The question was entirely ignored in lieu of the blonde man looking unreasonably happy. "Holy shit, you remembered my name!"

Pika swatted at her brother a second time, "Language!"

Denki ruffled her hair, "I am an adult and an uncle and I can do what I want," before turning to Shinsou, "please excuse her if she's being obnoxious, she gets that from her mother."

Hitoshi politely didn't suggest that it might run in the whole family.

Kaminari looked down at the burnt desk between them. "Woah, what happened here?"

Shinsou deadpanned, "Justice."

The blonde's laughter shook the girl on his lap.

Hitoshi returned their attention to the task at hand, "Would you like to hear about Pika's progress? Just in case you forgot why you came today."

Kaminari shot him two finger guns from around his niece's head, "Not my fault you're so distracting."

Shinsou did his best not to choke on his tongue before answering, "She's shown an impressive comprehension of language and science, but she struggles with mathematics. Pika also has some trouble with her quirk, but she has improved since the beginning of the school year."

Denki looked incredibly proud, and the little girl in his lap looked even prouder. She pinched the man holding her, "I told you so!"

The older blonde responded by putting his hand over her head and creating enough static that her two neat pigtails became big yellow poofs. The girl fussed over it wildly and her uncle narrowly missed a thrown slap.

Hitoshi felt it was a relevant time to add, "She's also had some moments of...excitability that have led to a couple of injured children but compared to the rest of the class she's a saint."

Denki's smile was softer than it had been so far, "You teachers put up with a lot of crap, don't you? I have a friend who's always telling me about his students. Brutal, man."

Shinsou was hesitant to hope he was talking about his 'friend' MindWash, but it brought some warmth to his chest either way.

"It's certainly never boring," he pulled a folder off his desk and handed it to the man across from him "You can pass this along to her mother. It includes a more detailed account of Pika's accomplishments and challenges."

When Kaminari took it from him their hands brushed and he felt a jolt of electricity. Judging by the man's expression it was entirely on purpose.

"Oops, sorry! I should make it up to you. Next time you come to Amped Up you can get a 'Yes Cat' for free!"

Shinsou grimaced.

"Or a whatever," the blonde corrected himself. "You will come back, right?"

 _Every single day if you want me to._

Hitoshi tried his best to shrug casually, "If I'm in the neighborhood."

Denki's thin eyebrows furrowed, "But it's so close to here! Your froggy girlfriend was there yesterday."

A startled laugh left Shinsou's throat, "God, no. She is definitely not my girlfriend. If anything she was trying to take out her hopefully _future_ girlfriend but they just keep dancing around it."

Kaminari nodded. "Yeah, it's the worst when two people are totally into each other but nobody says anything. Like, so bad it's a crime kind of worst."

The silence that followed was deafening.

Shinsou cleared his throat, "Right, well then. Do you have any questions?"

Pika looked up to her uncle, clearly ready to leave school as fast as possible.

Denki tore off a piece of paper, from within the folder Shinsou had handed him, and offered it to the purple-haired man. "Yeah, can I get your number?"

"I _meant_ questions about Pika's education."

Kaminari still held the piece of paper aloft, "In that case, I am _definitely_ questioning her education or whatever so you should probably give me your contact info. That'd be the professional thing to do, right?"

 _You sly motherfucker…_

Shinsou suppressed a smile as he took the paper and jotted down his phone number, "I suppose if it's in the name of education."

"It is!"

The purple-haired man went to hand it back, but the scrap was quickly snatched from the air by his whining student.

"Den, I wanna go home!"

Hitoshi saw Denki roll his eyes and silently mouth "cockblock" before pulling the paper away from her and putting it in his pants pocket. "I'll text you!"

Shinsou was pretty sure he turned three different shades of red but Kaminari took this in stride and grabbed his niece's hand to lead her out of the room. He waved his hand wildly, "Pika, be a good kid and say goodbye to Yes Cat-sensei!"

The young girl looked confused but was polite enough to offer a hesitant, "Goodbye Yes Cat-sensei?"

Hitoshi let out a resigned sigh before replying, "Goodbye, Pika."

It wasn't until after the last parent had walked out of his classroom that Shinsou realized there was an alert for three missed texts on his phone. He mentally had his fingers crossed as he pulled one open.

 **Midoriya:** Hello, Shinsou! Uraraka, Tsuyu, and I are going out for drinks tonight. I haven't seen you in ages. Want to join us?

Going out for drinks meant that he'd miss Ch4rgeb0lt's stream, but he did get to see him in person already- which he was still reeling from.

Then again, the last time he'd seen someone named Izuku it was his father's cat.

He pulled up the next message alert, which was a follow up from the first.

 **Midoriya:** Also, Todoroki is in a super good mood and I was told you have something to do with it? Thanks!

Shinsou didn't think news of his poorly veiled shade would have gotten around so quickly, but he wouldn't be surprised considering how close their family was (father excluded, of course).

 **You:** Endeavor and I had a conversation about his stellar parenting skills. I took advantage of being in a public place. You should have seen the shit-eating grin his kid was wearing.

 **Midoriya:** OMG you have to come tonight and tell us all about it! I'll bring Todoroki. He's going to want to buy you drinks.

 **You:** Where and when would we meet?

While waiting for an answer, Hitoshi opened the last message alert.

 **Unknown:** yes cat sensei! pika said she wants to marry u when she grws up and I told her u were gay. hoping thats true!

Of all the first messages he could have gotten from the blonde he didn't realize this was exactly what he wanted. Shinsou deftly programmed the new number into his phone before replying.

 **You:** Did you put my contact name in as any form of "Yes Cat"?

 **Denki:** r u psychic?!

 **You:** No, but I _am_ considering changing your contact name to No Cat.

 **Denki:** matching nicknames already? i guess it really is 2 late for Pika lol

If Ch4rgeb0lt thinks his brand of flirting is awkward then Shinsou is glad it isn't smoother because even this much was _seriously_ working on him. He brought his hands up to his face to stop himself from smiling like an idiot. Shinsou wasn't sure when it would hit him that this wasn't all some delicious fever dream, because it certainly felt unreal right now.

He'd been too distracted by the possible fantasy to notice Izuku had texted him back.

 **Midoriya:** That little dive bar off of Main that we went to last time. In an hour or so?

 **You:** Okay. I should have everything done by then. If you get there before I do just order my usual.

 **Midoriya:** A Shirley Temple for a delicate flower?

 **You:** I can hear you laughing at me from here.

Hitoshi knew the hero was making fun of him, but maraschino cherries, grenadine, and ginger ale are the staple of a good diet. It's right up there with Cup Noodles.

 _Alright, maybe dad has a point about my eating habits…_

He put his phone back into his pocket and started to straighten up the classroom. It would take him about ten minutes to get to the bar if he took the train, and not terribly longer to walk. The wind was just biting enough that he was leaning towards public transit.

Shinsou opened his phone and pulled up his calendar app. Ch4rgeb0lt's stream would be at 8 tonight so if he only stayed for one drink he might be able to catch the very end of it when he gets back. A part of him is hoping that today was exciting enough for Denki that he might mention their meeting in one of his many stories. Seeing him do that would be a great way to figure out if Kaminari actually was interested in him or if he was just using him for a laugh. Not intentionally at least, Ch4rgeb0lt has proven time and time again that he's a total softie and sweetheart. If he broke Shinsou's spirit it would be by accident.

When Hitoshi thought about the circumstances of it all he noticed one glaring thing. Wasn't it just a bit _too_ easy to have found Ch4rgeb0lt so close to him? Not just at a cafe but also as the guardian of one of his students? He couldn't help but be suspicious. Fate had never been that good to him before, and now that the thing he wants most in the world is dangling in front of his face with a smile? What if the second he thinks he'll finally get a real chance at someone he's long since fallen for, and it's all taken away at the end? Shinsou never got lucky breaks in life, not since his dads adopted him. Why should now be any different?

Hitoshi shook his head. He was probably just being paranoid, and nothing good would come of dreading a possible bad outcome. Either it would happen or it wouldn't, and he'd survive. It would hurt like hell, but he'd survive. Shinsou just really wishes this time luck will finally stand by his side. Surely, he's stepped on enough legos to have earned some happiness to even it all out?

Fate or no fate, Shinsou promised himself he was going to be the best damned actual-and-not-just-paying-for-it boyfriend that Kaminari could ever have.

Shinsou clutched his cell to his chest and pondered what super witty thing he could text Kaminari about. He would impress him in real life and the guy would never have to know about who MindWash was. It was important to be _physically_ in Ch4rgeb0lt's life as much as possible. He'd only have a chance if he really went for it.

...at worst he can always just beg his papa to give him more 'sad lonely internet man' money, but he was pretty confident he could sweep the blonde off his feet before then.


	7. Chapter 7

The bar was a small affair with velvet booths and warm lighting. It was known for being a favorite spot for heroes off the clock. It was even run by a retired sidekick who wanted to make a space for those who were "well-known and worn down". You didn't _have_ to be a hero to get in, but there was an unspoken rule that you don't bother anyone while they are trying to unwind. If someone tried to encroach on the space of a weary do-gooder, management quickly took things into hand. Friends of heroes were given the same special treatment, and Shinsou was a familiar enough figure that they greeted him warmly. He peered around the room and soon found Midoriya, Todoroki, and Uraraka waving to him from a booth. His Shirley Temple was already waiting on the table.

Izuku stumbled as he got up, "Shinsouuu!" The man was already tipsy and Todoroki was holding on to the back of his shirt in case he fell over. As Hitoshi neared, Midoriya reached out for a hug.

"It looks like you've started without me," Shinsou embraced the drunken man fondly before helping him sit down again.

"Just a bit," Midoriya chuckled, swaying a little too strongly for someone who has probably barely had anything to drink. For the number one hero he was a dreadful lightweight.

Izuku stood up again and put his hands on both sides of Hitoshi's face and yelled, "You have to tell us about your Endeavor _roast_! Ha! It's extra funny because he's always on fire, get it?"

The response, a pat on the poof of green hair, was probably patronizing but Shinsou didn't care.

He sat down next to Uraraka, and across from the two dating heroes, and took a sip of his drink.

"There's nothing to report," Hitoshi shrugged, "I didn't say anything that we weren't all thinking, anyway."

"Shinsou," Izuku started, "as far as I'm concerned? Tonight, _you_ are the number one hero."

Todoroki chimed in with an, "Amen," before clinking his glass against his boyfriend's.

Hitoshi knocked his own drink against Uraraka's and Izuku's, "He burnt one of my desks, but I think I'm keeping it because looking at the scorch mark just reminds me of how good it felt to put him down in front of his kid."

The red and white haired man pouted, "I really wish I could have seen it. Your school doesn't have security cameras in the classrooms do they? I'll have to ask Fuyumi for a full report."

"Dabi gave me a _fistbump_ , Todoroki. An actual fistbump. And then he smiled. I don't think I've even seen you smile."

In response, Todoroki stretched his mouth into what was probably intended to be a grin but instead gave the impression he'd just been kicked in the leg. He was _almost_ on par with Aizawa, and that was saying something.

Soon they fell into comfortable chit-chat, with a slowly sobering Izuku who had been cut off from drinking any further by his boyfriend. Uraraka was recounting a recent villain attack where the bank robber had left his wallet behind so he was apprehended within the hour. "I'm glad we got him, but it's unsatisfying when it's so easy."

Todoroki raised an eyebrow, "would you prefer to have gotten injured and narrowly missed the criminal escaping?"

While Uraraka didn't _say_ yes she certainly looked a bit guilty. Ochako could be a bit of an adrenaline junkie when it came to hero work, but don't let her catch you saying that.

A heavy sigh interrupted their talking and a tired Asui ambled over to the table.

"Sorry I'm late. I was putting out fires. Literally," Tsuyu must have grabbed a beer before she'd sat down because she was clutching it to her chest when she joined them, "Why am I a teacher? I keep forgetting."

Uraraka switched seats with Shinsou so she could sit next to the frog girl. "Because kids can be the worst but helping them learn and grow is both a rewarding and heroic thing to do?"

Hitoshi sympathized. He also felt obligated to share his excitement with the only other person who would understand. "Tsuyu, the cute guy from Amped Up came to my school today."

The frog girl was emotionally nursing a beer. "Hallucinating already? It's the lack of sleep, isn't it? Don't worry. One day someone blonde will probably like you."

Uraraka flinched, "Wow, that was cold."

"Sorry," Tsuyu sighed, "It's been a rough day. Two of my students got into a fight in the dorms. We lost half a wall. It was like Bakugou and Midoriya all over again. I didn't mean to take it out on you. That wasn't very Plus Ultra of me."

Izuku nodded sagely at her apology. Pleased that she understood their alma mater's sacred motto.

"Is he a father to one of your students?" Todoroki asked, sipping his sake gracefully.

Shinsou shook his head, "He's her uncle. He helps his older sister because she's a busy single parent."

Uraraka cooed, "Awww, that's sweet! Did you ask for his number?"

Hitoshi smiled softly, "Technically, he asked for mine. Though it was less of an 'ask' and more of a 'just do this, thanks' kind of exchange. He told me it was the professional thing to do. I don't know how professional it is to flirt with one of your student's guardians but I wasn't going to argue."

Tsuyu nodded, "You're welcome, Shinsou."

"Oh, come on. You weren't even there this time!"

Asui laughed, but Izuku had on a serious expression, absorbing every word of the story with the odd but fierce determination that only a drunk friend can have. "What's his name? Is his quirk interesting? Did he ever text you back?"

"Yeah, he texted me first. He never gave me his number and I was worried he'd just been messing around. His first text was basically 'hope you're gay, lol' and that sold me. We texted like, twice after but now I don't know what to text back," Shinsou turned to Tsuyu, "aren't you supposed to be the 'love master'? Teach me how to not look like the most desperate of gays."

Asui sighed into her beer, "It's not my fault you're so vigorously homosexual."

Hitoshi snorted at the thought, "No, but it'd be hilarious if it was. 'News Bulletin: Frog hero so excruciatingly lesbian that she made local gay gayer. More at eight.'"

Tsuyu whacked Shinsou across the head with her tongue but laughed all the same.

"As for his quirk," Hitoshi was careful not to say anything that would allude to him knowing more about the man then he was supposed to, "I don't know what it is. All I know is that he works at a cafe and he didn't seem to be using it in any capacity at the time."

Midoriya started hypothesizing quietly to himself in response and Todoroki covered Izuku's hand with his own. The two-toned man was always good at soothing his lover when the mumbling started.

Uraraka butted in, "You never gave us his name. Do you know it?"

"Kaminari Denki. He said he's friends with a number of heroes so maybe you've met him."

 _Fuck, Denki never told me about his hero friends. Ch4rgeb0lt did…_

Shinsou had to better monitor his responses or the game would be up. "He's blonde, a bit below average height, very big on smiling."

Izuku stopped mumbling and put a hand thoughtfully to his chin. "Hmmm, Kaminari might sound familiar? Though from the name alone I can't imagine his quirk is anything but electricity related. That or his parents are unimaginative lighting designers."

Tsuyu nodded, "He does have a lightning bolt shape in his hair."

Before any more thinking could be done Todoroki let out a small groan, warning them, "Heads up. Angry boy incoming."

Shinsou turned to look in the direction Shouto had gestured to and saw _the_ Ground Zero and Red Riot walking to their table. The pair's expressions vastly different, and you could practically feel the temperature of the room shift when they got closer. Judging by both of them still being in costume they were most likely coming directly from patrol, and by the looks of it, they had seen some serious villain action. The pissed off blonde had his eyes trained on Midoriya in a way that greatly worried Shinsou. Was he going to have to use his quirk to stop a barroom brawl between the number one and two heroes?

Ground Zero walked over and slammed a hand on their table before turning to glare at his redheaded partner. "This is why I wanted to stay home. I can't go anywhere without fucking _Deku_ stinking up the same air."

Midoriya gave him a drunken smile, "It's nice to see you too, Kacchan!"

"Fucking _shut it_ , ass licker."

No wonder his dad named their cats after them. These two fought worse than his pets did. They must be like this all the time because no one else looked even vaguely put off by the violent exchange.

Red Riot just grinned and waved, "Hey Midoriya, Uraraka, Todoroki, Tsuyu, purple-guy! Wait, do I know you?"

Shinsou shook his head, "No, but I'm pretty sure everyone in Japan has heard about _The_ Red Riot-"

Ground Zero looked in his direction and grunted.

"- and Ground Zero, of course."

Red Riot extended his hand, "I'm Kirishima Eijirou! Nice to meet you. This adorable furious guy is Bakugou, don't mind anything he says. He probably means every insult, but he won't actually hurt you."

Ground Zero elbowed Red Riot but the man's quirk kept him safe from any harm. If anything that guy's elbow must be hurting like a bitch, but if it did the blonde didn't show it.

Uraraka patted one of the empty seats in the booth, "Hey Kirishima! It's been ages. Come on and sit down!"

Bakugou grabbed Eijirou around the arm to stop him from joining them, "Absolutely not. We're going home."

Shinsou could easily speculate as to the relationship between these two but it seemed like a bad time to call someone out on being pretty gay.

Kirishima went ahead and sat down regardless, his arm still being held by his partner, "I never got your name!"

"It's Shinsou. I went to school with Midoriya, Uraraka, and Tsuyu."

Eijirou looked distressed, "What? You went to UA too? I'm sorry I don't remember you. Were you in General Education or something?"

Hitoshi shook his head, "The school I met them at was our teachers college, but I am very familiar with UA."

Bakugou begrudgingly shoved Kirishima over with his hip and sat next to him, "what kind of loser is 'familiar' with a school he didn't even go to?"

Shinsou gave his father's very distinctive grin, "My dads teach there."

The smile must have given it away because Kirishima immediately looked ecstatic, "No way! Aizawa-sensei is your dad?! That's so cool!"

Bakugou grabbed one of Midoriya's unopened beers and popped the cap, "So sleeping like shit runs in the family?"

Hitoshi was debating telling Ground Zero how he was so volatile as a student that his father named their asshole cat after him.

Todoroki chimed in, "I never knew you were sensei's son. I thought you only knew everyone because of school?"

Shinsou shrugged, "That _is_ how I met them. The rest is all coincidence."

Eijirou stole Bakugou's beer and took his own sip, "What a tiny world, bro! Did he ever talk about us?"

He might as well just say it.

Shinsou turned to meet the red eyes of the angriest man at the table, "He named our cats after you and Midoriya."

"The fuck?!" Bakugou barked.

"If it's any consolation they're very cute. Constantly trying to murder each other, but cute."

Kirishima was laughing so hard he had to put his beer bottle back on the table, "Oh man. That's priceless! No chance you got a big dog or something named after me, huh?"

"We're strictly cat people, sorry. Hizashi won't let us get another one just yet, but _when_ we convince him I'll toss your name into the suggestion pile."

The redhead's eyes went wide, "Aizawa-sensei and Present Mic are living together?"

 _Oh, shit._

How did his class not know? Hizashi made the man lunch every day and drew hearts on the bag he wrapped it in.

"Yeah. Ages ago, ever since they got married."

Kirishima's smile grew even bigger, "THEY'RE MARRIED?! Sero owes me ten bucks!"

 _Why did the name Sero sound familiar?_

Izuku pressed a wobbling hand against his heart, "And they're soooo cute together! I dropped Shinsou off at their house once, just to surprise them, and they are so domestic and fluffy!"

Todoroki put his arm around Midoriya's shoulders and pulled him closer, "Alright, It's time for this lush to get home."

Bakugou snorted, "Fucking amen. We should have walked out the second we saw the shitty nerd."

"Aw come on, we just got here!" Kirishima tried to intertwine his fingers with the blonde's but was batted away.

"No. Fuck this, we're going to Jirou's."

"You can't bring your beer there. It's a cafe, and they don't have a liquor license!"

"I'm Ground fucking Zero. I _am_ a liquor license."

Eijirou laughed, "Babe, I'm pretty sure that's not how it works."

Bakugou stood up and started walking away, his middle finger flashing at them over his shoulder.

Kirishima stood to follow him, but reached out a fist to Shinsou, "It was nice meeting you, dude!"

"Likewise," he said before bumping his knuckles against the other's. This would make two fistbumps in one day and Hitoshi felt like the coolest person at the table.

Todoroki and Midoriya excused themselves as well, one basically acting as a crutch for the other, "Let's meet up again soon, yes? No drinks next time."

Shinsou nodded and waved goodbye, "Get home safe."

After they'd left Uraraka, Tsuyu, and him spread out more comfortably in their booth. Finally able to stretch out their shoulders and legs.

"Poor Izuku," Uraraka sighed, "that boy can bench press a car but he can't even finish a margarita." She was mournfully holding her cup with her pinkies extended outwards, and Shinsou was reminded to be glad his quirk didn't get in the way of basic functions.

"He's always the one inviting us out for drinks, too." Tsuyu added.

Hitoshi surreptitiously checked his watch and realized he had ten minutes left to see Ch4rgeb0lt's stream.

"Hey, uh. I'll be right back. Anyone want another drink?"

Uraraka shook her nearly empty bottle, "One more of these, please!" Tsuyu murmured that she was fine, and continued to stare softly at an unknowing Ochako.

Shinsou stood up a little too fast and walked towards the bar, before ducking to the back and leaving through the side door. It wasn't that cold outside and he had a warm enough sweater.

He'd never used his phone to access the stream before, but surely it'd work the same way? Maybe he could slip in and Ch4rgeb0lt wouldn't notice he'd been absent. Shinsou pulled up the website and plugged in his password. It took a bit longer to load than it did on his laptop, but soon enough there was the smiling blonde he had long fallen in love with.

The feed was a bit grainy but it didn't stop Hitoshi from seeing the man's face light up. "Hey there, MindWash! I was wondering where you were!"

The chat greeted him too, and it was semi-mortifying to know he was there so often that he might as well be part of the stream. Then again MeatMeOutBack29 was just as bad.

 _Sorry I'm late. I was engaging in real life social interaction._

He got a couple of "lol"s and "whats that?" from the chat but those paled in comparison to the giggle-snort that Ch4rgeb0lt made.

"Good to hear you still made time for us! I missed you."

 _You need my $10 that badly?_

Ch4rgeb0lt laughed again before answering, "How else do you think I can afford all these fancy Cup Noodles?" He wiggled his eyebrows and gestured to his food with a pair of disposable wooden chopsticks. No matter how much practice the boy had with them, he never snapped them correctly. They were always broken unevenly at the top. Another viewer pointed it out and the stream's unofficial admin took it into his own hands:

MeatMeOutBack29 donated twenty dollars with an added note " _Please buy yourself an actual pair of chopsticks. Something of fine quality. You can thank me by thinking of me when you use them._ "

Shinsou thought it was a little creepy but it brought a grin to Ch4rgeb0lt's face, which in turn made the purple-haired man a little annoyed that he hadn't thought of it first.

"Awww, thank you Sweet Meat! I'll buy the nicest chopsticks ever, and think of you each time."

Hitoshi wanted a nickname too but he couldn't think of anything cutesy that rhymes with Mind or Wash.

A viewer he had seen pretty regularly pasted a link in the chat. It was for a pair of bright yellow chopsticks with glitter covering the bottom half of them.

It was hideous.

It was gaudy.

It was exactly the sort of thing Ch4rgeb0lt would love.

"Oh my gosh, I am totally getting these ones! I'm gonna bring them to work and make my coworkers jealous during our lunch break."

This prompted the usual, " _where do you work?_ " questions, but the blonde deflected it.

"Okay, I guess the time has come that l have to tell you...think of the coolest place you know. Like, the coolest one ever. Got it in mind? _That's_ where I work. I even own it. I'm kind of a big deal."

The sound of his own chuckle reminded Shinsou that he was standing in an alley and had completely abandoned his friends. He looked back down at the chat and was thinking of how to say goodbye when Ch4rgeb0lt solved the problem for him.

"It's that time again, folks! Thank you all for taking me on such a nice date tonight! Hope I'll see you next time!" The blonde leaned forward to kiss his webcam with a loud "mwah" before lifting his two fingers and causing a spark between them. "Zap you later!"

Hitoshi screen capped the image while the electricity was jumping from one finger to the next. He needed a contact photo to go with the boy's phone number, after all. It wouldn't be the first time he'd taken pictures from the stream, but it was the first time he had a purpose other than longingly looking at it during hard school days.

The feed cut and Shinsou rushed to reopen the side door. Only to find it was locked. Going around the building and coming back in through the front was a walk of shame he was not prepared for. Maybe his friends wouldn't notice.

After looping back to the entrance he peeked his head in the door and tried to spy if Uraraka and Tsuyu were even still there. The two girls were chatting and seemed invested in the conversation enough that there was a chance they hadn't noticed his absence.

By the time he reached their booth both of his friends were looking at him skeptically. "Hey, um I got your beer."

Uraraka looked at him with amusement, "Shinsou, you aren't holding any beer."

 _Fuck._

"Right. I'll go grab that. The line was long, and I guess I got distracted."

Tsuyu arched a green eyebrow, "Oh, please. You either had the world's quickest and saddest hookup or you're hiding something."

He gestured with his cell, "Dad needed my help with something. He's got me assisting him on a case. Brainwashing is a handy tool during interrogation." Technically true, but he certainly hadn't been on call tonight.

Uraraka wore a shit-eating grin, "We both know you can't use your quirk over the phone, dear."

 _Double fuck._

"I'll go get you that beer."

Both girls grabbed one of his hands and pulled him towards the table. The frog hero threw an arm over his shoulders to lock him in place. "This is way more interesting than a new beer. Spill it."

Shinsou sighed, "Can you to promise you won't think of me as a creepy old man afterward?"

Tsuyu and Uraraka answered in perfect unison, "Nope."

Hitoshi let his body slump forward so he could rest his forehead on the table, "So, there's this stream…"


	8. Chapter 8

"So, let me recap what you're telling me." Tsuyu paused for emphasis, "You fell in love with a cam boy- who you've been ditching spending time with your friends for- and ended up meeting him in a cafe _and_ having him be a guardian to one of your students?"

Shinsou airily sipped the last of his Shirley Temple, "That about sums it up."

Uraraka clapped her hands together, "No way! It's like a rom-com movie come to life! The perfect fairy tale!"

"It's pretty sleazy for a fairy tale," Tsuyu interjected.

Hitoshi glared. "There is nothing _sleazy_ about Ch4rgeb0lt, thank you very much."

"I don't know," Ochako hummed, "If you meet the love of your life after watching him jack off for the internet it _is_ a little dirtier than Disney."

"Fuck!" Shinsou started coughing heavily, and waved his arms, "No. Not that kind of cam boy! I didn't even think about how that sounded until now. No, it's a PG-13 thing. He just goes on dates with us. Like, dinner dates."

Tsuyu pouted, "Booo. That's much less interesting. I'm going to pretend you've seen him interact with a varied and illicit stash of sex toys. Much more fun."

Shinsou returned his forehead to the table, "Why would you say something like that?"

Uraraka wiggled her eyebrows,"You're thinking about it now, right? Maybe once you start dating he'd be up for giving you a special show."

Tsuyu faked a gasp, "Uraraka! You're supposed to be the pure one."

Hitoshi softly mumbled, "If you ever ask her out for real you'd find out how just wrong you are."

The frog hero didn't hear him but both of Ochako's hands flew out to cover Shinsou's mouth. "Shut up!"

Asui cocked her head, but Uraraka only smiled and gave a shaky laugh, "It's so weird that his blonde porn guy is a human, right?"

 _Real smooth there, Ochako._

Shinsou pulled one of her hands off his face, "I told you already, he's not like that. It's just eating ramen and chatting."

"You have to admit, he does look the taking-off-your-clothes-for-the-planet type of guy." Tsuyu pulled out her cell phone, "What's his name again?"

"You won't find it under his name. Search for Ch4rgeb0lt. It's a numerical 4 instead of an 'a' and a zero instead of an 'o'."

The brunette blanched, "He uses L33t? I don't know about this, Hitoshi. He might not be cool enough for you."

"Wow," the cell phone lit up Asui's face as she loaded his site, "It might be the other way around. This kid is making some serious money. Are you sure he isn't fucking the ramen once you log off?"

Uraraka leaned over to see the phone, "Oh yeah, he was the guy who asked about you at the cafe!" She pinched Shinsou's cheek adding, "That's our sleepy boy, capturing hearts just by walking into a room."

Tsuyu snorted, "I wouldn't call what he did 'capturing hearts' but he certainly made an impression."

Shinsou let himself hope that Tsuyu hadn't given Uraraka a dramatic retelling of his first time meeting Kaminari. It was bad enough to have lived through it himself.

"Either way, you've got to tell him."

Hitoshi groaned, "What am I supposed to say? Hey Denki, you look nice today. PS. I'm one of the losers paying you to fake-date me. Want to go on a real one? Will it still cost me?"

Uraraka nodded, "Yeah, that sounds good. Maybe not that last bit, but the rest of it is very...you."

"I feel like that was an insult."

Tsuyu put a supportive hand on his arm, "It'll be easier to get it out of the way now. Besides, from how you described it he likes your online persona. At least you aren't one of the creepy ones." She paused, "You aren't, are you?"

"A couple of days ago someone donated $50 and posted their address, asking that Kaminari send him his used boxers. Another guy did something similar but asked for the chopsticks he was using. Pretty sure telling him about my day doesn't put me on the creepy list."

Ochako wrinkled her nose, "Ewww."

Asui shook her head, "Hazards of the job, I guess." She checked the time on her phone and turned to the others, "We should be heading back. Are you stopping by your dads' place tonight?"

"Oh yeah," Uraraka chirped, "I wanna say hi to Aizawa-sensei!"

"That's later this week. Plus I'd get scolded for being tipsy. I'm not really in the mood to be treated like a high schooler."

The two girls laughed, easily imagining Present Mic playing the nagging mother while Aizawa looks on blankly.

The frog hero stood up from the booth and stretched her arms. "Let's head back then. Uraraka, would you like me to walk you home?"

"Thank you! I'd love that."

If only Tsuyu knew just how much she loved it. One of these days Shinsou might spill the beans just to stop himself from watching any more of their awkward pining. Though it did inspire him to take matters into his own hands with Kaminari.

He bid farewell to his friends and started the walk home, already planning on visiting Amped Up in the morning.

It was nine AM and Shinsou was shuffling down the street, psyching himself up for a trip to the cafe. One that would hopefully lead to a date. He was going to ask Denki out, and he was going to be smooth, damnit.

The trip was short and soon he was staring down the building and trying not to hyperventilate.

He pushed open the heavy glass door and heard the ring of a bell announce his entry. Denki and Mina were behind the counter fiddling with their phones, but Kaminari looked when he heard the noise.

The blonde lit up once Shinsou stepped into the light, "Cat sensei! I didn't expect to see you."

Hitoshi didn't tell him that the only reason he had come in was that he was hoping Kaminari would be there.

"I happened to be in the neighborhood. School starts late today and I need the caffeine."

Kaminari gave him an odd look, "Late? Dude, it's a holiday. Aren't schools closed?"

Shinsou did the mental count of the month's days before feeling like a supreme idiot.

"Well, fuck. I'm glad I mentioned it. I think I'm still a bit hungover from meeting with my friends last night."

Kaminari laughed a little too loudly, "Getting drunk the night before working with kids, huh? Very professional."

"As professional as giving my number to the guardian of one of my students?"

The blonde smiled innocently, "Nah, that one's okay." He turned towards the coffee machine and looked over his shoulder, "Another latte today, or something else?"

Hitoshi shrugged, "Surprise me."

"Any monosyllabic things you want drawn in the foam?"

Shinsou was coming to accept the fact that he was never going to live that down.

Mina shook her head, "I don't think anything could live up to Yes Cat. You should just draw a new version of that. We can make it a series! Ooh, I'll put it up on the cafe's Instagram!"

Shinsou made a noncommittal noise. He had a feeling they'd do what they wanted no matter what he said.

Before starting on the drink Denki pulled something out of his pocket and shouted, "Say cheese!"

"What?"

A bright light flashed from Kaminari's phone, and by the time Shinsou realized he'd had his picture taken Denki was already turning it around to show him. "See how cute you look?"

It was a patently horrible photo. Shinsou's eyebrows appeared vaguely startled, his expression was as flat as usual, and his hair was dropping a bit too much to one side.

"Please delete that."

Kaminari held his phone out of reach, "Not a chance! It's perfect. I'll make a dumb face for you if you want. You need a pic of me for your contact info, right?"

 _I already have one._

"Don't bother. I know who you are. I don't need a photo to figure out who is texting me when you write like a high schooler who just discovered the internet."

Mina interrupted them by shouting, "Burn!"

Kaminari huffed, "I'll have you know the way I text is incredibly charming."

Shinsou didn't want to tell him the truth so he dodged it, "How much do I owe you for whatever you're making me?"

Kaminari waved his hand dismissively, "I electrocuted you at the school, remember? This one is on me."

Which Shinsou still believed was done on purpose.

The blonde went to work on making his drink, whistling a random melody as he steamed the milk and poured the espresso. Mina was assisting a new customer and that meant she couldn't butt in on their conversation. It certainly felt like a now-or-never moment.

Kaminari was leaning over the drink putting the finishing touches on whatever latte art he was creating when Shinsou surprised himself by asking, "Do you maybe want to go out sometime?"

Denki looked up, startled, before putting a finger to his chin in thought, "I think I'll let your drink answer for me."

He pushed the cup forward and Shinsou saw a foam drawing of a calico cat with the word 'yes' in bubble letters above it.

 _Cute._

Shinsou fumbled over his reply, "So, dinner? Or would you rather grab...well, not coffee I guess, but a drink?"

"I work evenings so I couldn't do dinner, but we could have lunch?"

 _Of course he works evenings. I spend basically every night literally watching him do that._

"Sure, yeah. You, um, know how to contact me."

Denki laughed, "I'm glad I'm not the only one really bad at this."

There was an annoyed grunt from the kitchen, and out walked Ground Zero of all people. "Too fucking true. It hurts listening to you nerds. Also, your shower is broken again Dunce Face." He was dressed in a tank top and sweatpants and walking around barefoot.

The man's spiky hair was still damp, but Shinsou was confident that even if the shower had been working properly his mood would still be sour. Upon taking a good look at Hitoshi, the ash blonde stopped short. "Didn't I see you with the shitty nerd last night?"

Kaminari perked up, "You know each other?"

Shinsou took a fortifying sip of coffee, "Yes. Ground Zero and I bumped into each other at the bar yesterday. I think we ruined his night."

Mina butted in, "Just call him Bakugou. Or if you want to drastically shorten your lifespan you could go with a nickname."

Bakugou sneered at the girl before reaching into the back of the cafe's display case and pulling out a blueberry muffin.

"Dude! Jirou is so going to charge me for that." Denki balked.

Ground Zero shrugged, "Sounds like something that isn't my problem."

Shinsou was still having trouble understanding why the number two hero was stealing muffins from a tiny cafe. "Do you work here too?"

Bakugou looked incredibly offended, "Are you fucking with me?"

"I'm just surprised to see you here."

That prompted Kaminari to chime in, "I keep telling Bakubro he should work some hours. He's here often enough anyway. Besides, it'd be good publicity for us to have the number two hero making cappuccinos, right? We could even change the name to _Grounds_ Zero to fit the coffee theme!"

"I'm not sure if I should be ashamed of you or ridiculously proud," Mina sighed.

Denki grinned, "My vote is for ridiculously proud, FYI."

Bakugou had clearly heard this pitch before and continued munching on his breakfast with a bored expression. Shinsou couldn't help but want to badger the volatile man. "Is Red Riot here as well?"

The other man sighed, "Shitty Hair is currently fighting with the broken ass shower upstairs. When he felt the cold temperature he took it as a personal challenge."

Kaminari certainly had an interesting group of friends.

Mina winked, "Temperature play, huh? You two are so open-minded!"

Bakugou threw a chunk of muffin in her direction, "Fucking gross."

"Kinkshaming?" Denki gasped, "Not in my cafe!"

"But this isn't your cafe," Mina deadpanned.

"Not the point!"

At that moment the aforementioned Red Riot padded out from the kitchen, dressed as casually as Bakugou was, and goodness he looked different with his hair down. If Shinsou cared about these sorts of things he'd take a photo.

"Purple guy!" The redhead was all smiles, "Whatcha doing here?"

Bakugou answered for him, "He's here to a do a shitty job of asking Drooly on a date."

Kirishima smiled even wider, "Awesome!"

Kaminari blushed and Shinsou undoubtedly looked flustered but that did very little to stop the others.

Mina chimed in next, "You should have seen him the first time he was here! Cat Man was soooo awkward."

"Cat man?" Kirishima cocked his head to the side.

Shinsou cut off the inevitable story, "Kaminari drew me a cat. They all forgot my name."

"We didn't forget it," Denki argued, "It just wasn't as impressionable as Yes Cat was!"

Hitoshi turned to Mina, "In that case, what's my name?"

She paused, "Uh, shhh...tosh...something?"

The purple haired man looked at Kaminari for any sort of comeback and found none. At least he knew the blonde remembered his actual name, even if he doesn't think the man had ever called him by it.

Denki pinched Mina on the shoulder before jumping out of range of any retaliation. "I'm gonna go grab the brownies out of the oven!"

Once he had scurried off into the kitchen, Shinsou found himself in a lightning fast headlock. Kirishima had his neck sandwiched between his arm muscles and his smile was a lot less friendly. The shark teeth didn't help.

Mina and Bakugou crept forward, the latter bending a bit over to be eye-level with Hitoshi. "I might only be the number two hero but I'm gonna be your fucking number one nightmare if you hurt our shitty Pikachu." He held up his palm and small but very hot sparks started popping much too close to Shinsou's face. "Understand me, dipshit?"

Hitoshi tried to pull Red Riot's arm back enough to answer but found he couldn't. He settled for nodding instead once it became clear that Kirishima wasn't planning on moving. The redhead spoke next, "Denki seems to really like you, so don't go messing this up ok? I really don't want to have to get my hands dirty, if you get what we're saying."

Mina didn't speak but she did demonstrate just how quickly her acid could eat through a large coffee cup.

Kirishima let Shinsou go, and in a show of good faith gave him what was probably supposed to be a reassuring pat on the back. Considering the man's strength it was more like a punch, and Hitoshi didn't want to entertain how much it would hurt if Red Riot ever really tried to hit him. Aizawa might have kept his son battle ready, but he'd go down in a second if Kirishima wanted a fight.

"I think I get the idea, thanks." Shinsou rubbed his sore neck, "It's not like I want to hurt him. I like him a lot."

"Great!" Mina cried, "Then you really have no excuse if you fuck it up. Go get 'em, tiger!"

The three backed away at the sound of footsteps, and soon Denki emerged from the kitchen carrying a tray of pastries, none the wiser of the battle that had just gone down.

"Did I miss anything interesting?"

The three attackers chorused, "No," which made Kaminari give them a bit of a distrustful look.

Shinsou knew better than to say anything about it in front of them, "We were just chatting."

"Cool! Hey, Bakugou. Wanna help me ice these? Yours always look better than mine and Jirou's!"

The taller blonde huffed, "Of course mine are the best. Move over."

Hitoshi could tell that he'd just witnessed Kaminari convince the angry man by appealing to his prideful side, and he was impressed at how well it worked. If he had a death wish he'd point it out.

Kirishima scooched closer to Bakugou and reached out to snag a brownie. Before he could grab it he had his hand brutally batted away. "Keep your fucking paws off of them till it's finished. Don't only eat the icing this time either."

Shinsou surmised that the four people in front of him were very close, and could guess that the pro heroes must be here frequently enough to feel at home. He felt a bit like he was intruding on a family scene.

"I should be heading out. Might as well prepare for when it isn't a holiday. Thanks again for the reminder, by the way."

Denki looked up from icing the brownies and grinned, "Anytime! You should come by more often. Just in case there are more holidays or whatever."

Shinsou felt himself smile softly, "I'll do that. Should I text you about meeting up later?"

Mina looked unamused, "Duh."

In retrospect, it was a stupid question but thankfully Kaminari didn't seem to think any less of him for asking it.

"Yeah! Just send me a time and place."

Shinsou nodded and stood there awkwardly before realizing he had agreed to leave. He was halfway to the door when Denki called for him. "Wait! You didn't say whether or not you liked your foam cat!"

Hitoshi laughed. He knew there was no other way to answer than "Yes."


	9. Chapter 9

It took exactly twelve seconds for Shinsou to get far enough away from the cafe window that none of the baristas would be able to see him texting his friends about how excited he was. To save himself the trouble he added Uraraka, Tsuyu, and Midoriya into a group chat. Considering it was a holiday he knew they were unlikely to be teaching, and If they were on patrol they could just text back later.

 **You:** I did it. I asked out my gay.

 **Uraraka:** OMG I'm so proud of you! Did he say yes?

 **You:** To my absolute surprise, yeah.

 **Tsuyu:** Hold onto him, ribbit. That's my ticket to free coffee you're fucking.

Shinsou had to stifle the odd lovechild of a laugh and a gasp of outrage. He probably looked bizarre standing on a street corner and forcing himself not to chuckle, but he'd excuse himself considering the occasion.

 **You:** We haven't even gone on a date yet, jesus christ Tsuyu.

 **Midoriya:** Congratulations Shinsou!

 **Uraraka:** Oh, I didn't even think about the free coffee. If I tell him I urged you to ask him out do you think I'd at least get the employee discount?

 **You:** Maybe you, but Tsuyu ruined her chances when she said he looked like he'd be an adult film kind of camboy.

 **Midoriya:** What's a camboy?

There were many things Hitoshi wasn't ready to explain to Izuku, but this was one he really wanted out of. He thinks it would feel like telling a kid that Santa Claus wasn't real.

 **Uraraka:** We'll tell you when you're older.

 **Midoriya:** I'm older than you!

 **Uraraka:** By a few months. When it comes to the ways of the world you're still 12.

 **Tsuyu:** Not gonna lie. It's weirdly hot when you shame Izuku.

 **You:** Am I interrupting something?

 **Uraraka:** I hope so.

If these two were finally going to ask each other out then Shinsou is at least comforted by the fact that he asked Kaminari to go on a date before they did.

First place, suckers.

 **Midoriya:** Not sure how I feel about you finding Izuku-abuse hot, but okay.

 **Tsuyu:** Want to grab dinner together later, ribbit?

 **Midoriya:** Yeah, that sounds great!

Oh, Izuku. You sweet summer child.

 **You:** She wasn't asking us, Midoriya.

 **You:** Tsuyu was asking Ochako out. On a date. You can't join them.

 **Uraraka:** Yes! I'd love to have dinner :)

 **Midoriya:** Oh, right. I knew that. I was just making a joke!

 **You:** There is not a person in this chat who believes you.

 **You:** Also, way to steal my dating thunder.

 **Uraraka:** Ha! Thunder! Cause he has an electricity quirk, right?

 **Midoriya:** But thunder is just rapidly heated air expanding. Technically it does happen after lightning but no part of the thunder is actually electric itself...

 **Tsuyu:** Not the time, Izuku.

 **Tsuyu:** But seriously, I'm proud of you Shinsou.

 **Uraraka:** Yeah, I'll be honest I never thought you'd actually do it.

 **You:** Your lack of faith in me is crushing.

 **Uraraka:** That just means you've grown as a person! I bet your dads will freak. When is the date?

 **You:** I don't know yet. He told me to text him the details. What's a good place for lunch? What should I wear? How do I tell him I know he's a camboy?

 **Midoriya:** That's it. I'm Googling. If you won't tell me what a camboy is, the internet will.

 **Uraraka:** IZUKU NO.

This is not how Shinsou wanted this to happen. Largely because he never wanted anyone else to find out. It was mortifying enough to deal with Tsuyu and Uraraka. Now Midoriya was pulling up what will undoubtedly just be a lot of porn. Hopefully he isn't at his office.

 **Izuku:** Well.

 **Izuku:** Um.

 **Izuku:** If it makes him happy? That's good?

 **Izuku:** Can we all promise not to tell Todoroki this happened?

 **Tsuyu:** Absolutely not. I've already screenshotted this, ribbit.

Now Todoroki will know too...Fuck, fuck, fuck.

 **You:** If you love me at all you won't send that. It's bad enough Midoriya thinks I'm dating a pornstar.

 **Uraraka:** I'll clear that up now. It's different, Izuku. Kaminari isn't that kind of camboy. He's more like an emotional pornstar.

 **You:** I think you actually managed to make it sound worse.

 **Midoriya:** So he touches himself...with feelings?

 **You:** I'm deleting this chat.

 **You:** And never speaking to any of you again.

 **Tsuyu:** Put a $5 bill in your boyfriend's thong for me, would you? I like to support the arts.

Shinsou promptly deleted the chat and put his phone away. That conversation had definitely not gone the way he would have wanted. He should have known putting three of his friends in one space always created mayhem, but he had no idea it would look like this.

There was still a lot of day left ahead of him, but Hitoshi was already worrying that it was either too quick or too late to text Denki about meeting up. He went back to teaching tomorrow, and his whole week would be full of students and not enough sleep. The ideal timing for a date would be later this afternoon. Maybe he got an hour or something off for lunch? Would he be okay meeting Shinsou so soon after being asked out? He didn't want to look too excited. He has to have some cool if he's going to impress the blonde.

It seemed weird to text Denki when he was sixty feet away from him at most.

Steeling himself, Shinsou turned around and headed back to the cafe. He somehow got the courage to open the door and step inside without fleeing the way he wanted to.

He guessed the staff didn't realize he'd come back in because he caught the end of a conversation between Kaminari and Bakugou. It seemed like a pep talk since Ground Zero said, "You'll be fucking fine. Knock him off his feet"

Denki paused, "Don't you mean...sweep him off his feet?"

The other blonde raised one eyebrow and answered, "Did I fucking stutter?"

Shinsou had been scared of Bakugou before, but this really solidified that feeling. He better speak before he gets yelled at for eavesdropping.

"Hey, uh...it's me again."

Kaminari looked over to find him and smirked, "I can tell."

Shinsou's heart was pounding in his chest, and he wouldn't be surprised if the other boys could hear it. He was sure Bakugou was literally able to smell fear anyway.

"It seemed weird to text you when I was so close. I realized the rest of the week I'll be teaching, and that maybe if you had time today we could get lunch? Or not. I'm just now realizing that I could have suggested the weekend. We can do that instead. Sorry. No rush or whatever."

Kaminari shook his head, "Nah, man. Today works! I can get Sero to come in early. He owes me for when I charged his phone, laptop, and DS all at the same time. That messed me up. I'm pretty sure I tasted colors for like a week."

Hitoshi managed to smother the undoubtedly stupid grin he was going to make. He had an image to maintain, after all. "So when should I pick you up?"

Denki winked, "I thought you already picked me up? Really though, I can get off around 1 and we could go somewhere? Technically I can get off at 12 but I wanna shower. I refuse to go on a date smelling like the tears of a minimum wage worker."

"So I'm picking you up from your home or…?"

"Dude, you're already at my home. I live upstairs. That's where this angry Pomeranian and his boyfriend stayed last night." Kaminari deftly dodged an expected punch with the grace of someone who has needed to learn this to survive.

Shinsou took a moment to thank his father for helping him hone his quick reflexes. If this relationship worked out he had a feeling he was going to need this skill whenever Bakugou was around.

"Cool, then I'll come back at 1. See you later."

Denki smiled and Hitoshi felt his heart clench at the sight of it.

Shinsou awkwardly lifted his hand to wave goodbye, and held it up a little too long, before spinning around quickly and walking out.

He could hear Bakugou laughing at him all the while.

To be fair, that went considerably better than he thought it would.


	10. Chapter 10

If Shinsou was bold enough to look at just how long he'd been agonizing over an outfit for his date he'd find it to be twenty minutes of staring at various shades of black clothes- that, quite frankly, all looked the same. He was a man of understated style, and the fanciest he got was button down shirts when he was at work. Was a lunch date a button down occasion? Ten minutes of Googling, and carefully avoiding Yahoo Answers, led to him finding out that they were perfectly acceptable, especially on a first date. "You want to leave a good first impression," the fashion bloggers all said.

Shinsou was pretty sure that ship sailed the moment he said "Yes Cat," but it's the thought that counts. According to Mina it was a good impression, despite all common sense. He was lucky that Denki had pretty egregious taste.

After double checking he had his wallet and keys, Hitoshi looked at his watch to find he still had some time before he needed to leave. Which meant he had time to quietly panic. He considered texting someone for support, but he had already managed to firmly look like a dweeb in front of everyone he knows.

He should plan the date itself, first. Would taking Kaminari to a ramen place be too on the nose? Shinsou didn't want to give anything away until he'd figured out how to come clean about knowing the man is Ch4rgeb0lt. He knew the man liked American food, he had frequently referred to it as "trendy" on the stream, so that was a safe bet. There were some places in the area that would work, and he could just ask the guy what he'd prefer.

It was weird to think that this was sort of his second serious date with Denki, and a significantly cheaper one, but Kaminari wouldn't know that. He'd also have to play dumb on a number of things or the blonde would sense in a heartbeat that Shinsou knew a little too much about him.

He had been fretting so deeply he almost missed that he that should already be leaving if he wanted to be on time. Hitoshi practically flew out of the house, throwing his headphones on to block out any more mental panicking he'd inevitably start doing.

By the time he'd reached Amped Up, and looked inside, Kaminari was nowhere to be seen. The bell rang as Shinsou stepped through the cafe's front door. Mina and Sero were behind the counter, arm wrestling of all things, and the tape user's elbows were proving to be a significant advantage. Mina's knuckles hit the counter and she whined.

"No fair! I call cheating!"

Sero shrugged, "You shouldn't play the game if you aren't willing to lose."

Kirishima had been cheering them on, now dressed like an adult and not a kid at his first slumber party, like the supportive friend he clearly is. It's hard to marry that smiling image with the man who had his neck in a killer chokehold hours earlier. Bakugou sat at one of the tables sorting through what looked like two piles of fanmail- judging by the hearts drawn on some of them- with a bored expression. The pile on the left was nothing but burnt and hand shredded paper, while the pile on the right (which was significantly smaller) was neatly stacked.

Shinsou nodded a greeting when they looked up.

Sero gave a disturbingly toothy grin, "Huh, you actually showed up!"

"Was I not supposed to?"

Mina laughed, "We were wondering whether or not we properly scared you off with our shovel talk. Consider that the first test, Cat man."

Kirishima nodded, "You now have two points."

Hitoshi arched a purple eyebrow, "How did I get the first one?"

"Eijirou liked your shoes," Bakugou grunted from his seat.

His boots were as old as he was, but if it won him some votes then he'll wear them every date. Yes. Every date. He was trying to be optimistic.

"Hey!" Kaminari walked out from the kitchen, which must be where the stairs to his apartment were, and skipped past the counter. "You made it!"

Hitoshi looked him up and down and tried desperately not to blush. The blonde looked good. A tight blue t-shirt with an oversized comfy looking yellow sweater over it that had sleeves which were adorably just a little too long for him. His legs looked a mile long in skinny black jeans and boots, and Shinsou was surprised his fashion sense was better in real life than it ever looked on his streams.

"Look nice."

 _Monosyllabic words again. This guy really brings out the best in me._

Denki didn't seem to mind. He even twirled in place before bending forward in a dramatic bow. "Thank you, kind sir! You don't look too bad yourself. You ready to go?"

Shinsou nodded, not trusting himself to speak.

Mina and Sero catcalled obnoxiously while Kirishima just laughed. Bakugou was absorbed in his work but still growled a bored sounding, "Don't fuck it up."

"I'll try not to!" Denki called back.

Bakugou looked at him scornfully, "That wasn't directed at you, drooly," before turning to lock eyes with Hitoshi and then sharply drawing a finger across his neck in warning.

Shinsou gulped.

Kaminari was all glowing smiles, "Isn't he the sweetest? Just makes you want to squeeze him, right?"

Shinsou was smart enough to leave quickly since a heavy envelope hit the door hard mere seconds after they'd closed it behind them.

Denki snickered at their near miss."So, where are we headed?"

"Is it rude to say you look like someone who likes American food?"

Kaminari 'hmm'd to himself, "Maybe, but you're totally right. There's a pretty good place a couple of blocks from here. Wanna do that?"

Hitoshi shrugged, "If you like. It's your date too," before pausing. "This is a date, right?"

Denki looked nervous and cocked his head to the side, "Do you not want it to be?"

"Would it convince you it was if I told you that I spent around twenty minutes trying to pick an outfit for this?"

The blonde laughed, "That's cool. I spent thirty."

Kaminari led the way to the restaurant, happily talking all the while as Shinsou nodded or added short replies to keep him going. There was something really nice about not being pressured to speak. He felt that Denki might have picked up on that, but he couldn't be sure. If there was one thing he knew it was that the blonde was good at reading people- even through a screen.

"-and that's why Kirishima isn't allowed to have sugar after six pm. Kind of like that movie where the monsters can't have water or something like that after midnight? Either way, Mina and I make sure to slip him some Jolly Ranchers around, like, eight just to see what happens. Bakugou gets sooo pissed. It's awesome."

"You have some very interesting friends," Shinsou said as democratically as possible.

Denki wholeheartedly agreed before stopping short and pointing at the store in front of them, "Here we are! I think you'll like it. Do you eat burgers? They have super good burgers."

Shinsou held the door open for the other man, who theatrically swooned before walking through it. "I'm not picky. I'll trust your recommendation."

The demure hostess led them to what looked like an old fashioned American diner booth. The whole place had that theme to it. 'Trendy,' indeed.

The two sat down across from each other and grabbed the menus handed to them. Kaminari immediately leaned over the table to point different dishes out to the purple-haired man. "This burger and their chicken wings are easily the best things on here, but I've practically tried everything and it's all good. Are you one of those people who only eats salad on dates?"

Shinsou shook his head, "No. Are you?"

"Hell naw. Salad is for losers," the blonde paused, "unless you like them in which case they're cool!"

Hitoshi laughed. The boy was adorably awkward and it made him feel a lot better about his own lack of skill. "I don't really have strong stances on salads. My papa has spent years forcing them down my throat so I'm well acquainted."

Kaminari made a cooing sound, "You call your dad your _papa_? That's too cute!"

"I have two fathers. We use 'Dad' and 'Papa' to differentiate. They argued over who got to be which and eventually flipped a coin for it. My dad is still smug about the win."

The waitress came and took their orders while Shinsou debated bragging about his father being the pro hero Eraserhead, but he figured he'd save that surprise for later.

"I wish I had two moms. If I have to hear one more dad joke I'm going to scream at, like, Present Mic levels."

Shinsou choked on his own spit.

Kaminari leaned over the table again to hit him on the back, "You okay, man?"

"Yeah," Hitoshi wheezed, "that was just...funny."  
The blonde lit up, "I'm a pretty funny guy. Mina, Sero, and Kirishima think so, anyway."

"Not Ground Zero?"

Denki smiled crookedly, "Bakugou used to keep a tally of puns that I made and punch me in the arm for each one at the end of the day. Kirishima calls it 'tough love,' but Bakugou freaks out if we use the 'L' word. Not the show though, he likes the show." Then he whispered, "You can't tell him I told you that!"

"I don't think he wants to talk with me anyway."

"Nah," Kaminari added, "I think he actually likes you...a bit. He approves, at least. Last time a guy tried to pick me up at the cafe he left with part of his jacket on fire. Bakugou isn't afraid of making his opinion clear."

Hitoshi snorted, "I've noticed."

Their conversation was light. They exchanged basic interests and life plans. Denki enjoyed helping Jirou run the cafe and had no "grander goals" while Shinsou admitted he wanted to get into the underground hero business someday.

"Yeah? You never told me your quirk anyway, what do you do?"

Shinsou got the butterflies in his stomach that he always did when someone asked. The reactions were rarely anything good. He braced himself, "If someone answers a question of mine I can control their actions."

"That is so…" Kaminari paused and Hitoshi was ready to die until the blonde went, "COOL! Oh my gosh, you'll be the best hero ever! Unless it's like a fire or something, but otherwise you just ask the bad guy who goes to dramatically monologue about his plan and BAM that sucker is doing the chicken dance until the police arrive!"  
"...What?"

Denki frowned, "Did I say something wrong? Is this about the chicken dance part?"

Shinsou rapidly shook his head, "No, I just...no one has ever answered so positively to that. Usually I get told that it's creepy and then people don't answer me when I talk to them."

Kaminari frowned, "That's messed up. You're obviously not the kinda guy who abuses that stuff. People can be so mean!"

Their waitress returned, carrying two plates that smelled delicious, and told them to enjoy their meal. Denki still looked annoyed about what Shinsou had said and kept his pout even as he ate. It made him look like a chipmunk and was pretty goddamn cute.

"You don't have to worry. I'm used to it."

Kaminari slammed a hand on the table, startling a nearby couple, "That's even worse! Just because you're used to crappy behavior that doesn't excuse it. Ugh, it makes me so mad!" Once he noticed the other tables looking he quickly turned bashful, "Uh, sorry. I just hate it when people do stuff like that. I mean...you're a really nice guy, you know? You deserve better."

If Shinsou wasn't in love before he sure as hell was now. He managed to swallow the "marry me," that had almost burst out of him, and settled for a warm, "Thank you."

This brightened Denki's mood right up, and the man went back to happily stuffing his face. Now seemed like a good time to change the subject.

"So, how did you meet Bakugou and Kirishima? They aren't exactly your average citizens, and you seem very close."

Kaminari swallowed a bite. "We went to school together. Not for super long, but we clicked really fast. Mina and Sero too. We were the Bakusquad! Still are, I guess?"

Shinsou looked shocked, "You went to UA?"

"Sort of? I wouldn't have done it if my middle school teacher hadn't told me I should take a crack at it, but it didn't stick."

"Where did you go to middle school?"

"This little place in Saitama. Nothing too exciting. My sensei was the coolest though. He's Eraserhead now!"

Shinsou was sure that Denki must have short-circuited him because there was no way that his father had taught his (ideally future) boyfriend at two different schools.

"Wait, you seriously had Aizawa as your teacher?"

"Yeah! Aizawa-sensei was the one who told me I should apply to UA. I couldn't believe it when I got in and was placed in his class. I was there long enough to make some friends but I transferred to a regular high school instead."

Shinsou cocked his head, "You didn't want to be a hero anymore?"

"I didn't say that. I think being a hero can mean a lot of things. I'm not cut out to go zapping my friends while trying to chase bad guys. I freeze up and panic. Sensei would call me out on that all the time. I had only been there about a month or two before I dropped out. I'd rather someone have my chance to make a difference fighting instead of staying in school with the hopes that I could become a different person. I don't know who got my spot but that's one more hero doing a job I couldn't. I don't regret my choice, but I always felt bad for wasting Aizawa-sensei's time."

Shinsou boldly reached out to hold Kaminari's hand, "Trust me, I know Aizawa and he didn't consider that time a waste. He wouldn't have let you leave if he didn't feel it was best for you to chase your happiness somewhere else. He's got a bad record for expulsion, but he's fought to keep kids in class that were thinking of dropping out. If he believed you would be doing the most help by staying then you'd never have been allowed to leave. If anything, I bet he appreciates that you knew yourself well enough to make that decision and give someone else a chance."

Denki smiled softly, "You really think so?"

"I know so. In fact, you could ask him yourself if you like?"

"How? He's probably super busy being a hero and teaching."

"I've got some connections."

Kaminari lit up, "Seriously? That's so cool! How do you know him? Was he your teacher too?"

Shinsou grinned before replying, "Let's just say he and I go way back."


	11. Chapter 11

Shinsou insisted on paying for their food, citing the date as his idea and smoothly adding, "You can get the next one." Kaminari laughed but nodded, and the purple-haired man felt infinitely better about how the day was going.

It was late in the afternoon, but not too late that his father and papa would be at the radio station or doing underground hero patrol. He really wanted to see Kaminari lose his mind at finding out Aizawa was his dad. It was already extremely hard not to smile widely whenever Denki mentioned him. Shinsou was considering whether or not he could catch the moment on camera.

As they left the restaurant, Kaminari started up his chatting, and Hitoshi subtly took out his phone to text his papa.

 **You:** Are you and dad home right now? I want to bring some someone special.

It barely took a second before he got a reply.

 **Loud Papa:** Someone special!? Yes! We will be here! Should I make cookies?

Shinsou tried not to laugh at his papa's excitement. It's sweet to see him be so invested in his son's social life.

When Hitoshi was growing up it was always Hizashi who encouraged him to make friends and step out of his comfort zone. He'd never brought a date to meet them before, so he imagined his papa was over the moon. Shinsou couldn't help but wonder if Kaminari also knew 'Present Mic-sensei' or if they'd not really interacted before he dropped out. He was looking forward to finding out.

He also wanted it to be a proper surprise, and had a trick up his sleeve. "Kaminari, seeing as you are a gentleman, I imagine you'd like to walk me home?"

Denki stopped talking to focus on the other boy's words instead, "Yeah! I'm great at being a gentleman. Practically the best. I'll walk you home better than anyone else. Consider yourself walked! I'll be Eraserhead levels of cool."

A 'yes' would have sufficed but Hitoshi should have guessed the answer was never a bland one when it came to Kaminari.

"Eraserhead, huh? That must be very high levels of cool."

Kaminari nodded vigorously in response.

Hitoshi tried not to laugh, "It's not too far from here. Do you need to be anywhere later?" The two picked up their pace, and Shinsou noticed Denki had to take twice as many steps as he did to keep beside him.

 _Cute._

"Yeah, I have work at the cafe around dinner time. Just a small shift but uh, people hate working closing hours and somebody has to do it!"

Kaminari was clearly lying through his teeth, but it wasn't the right time to call him on it. Nor would it be a good way to reveal himself. Mostly because it would inevitably sound like: 'Stop being a liar! I know you're going on hundreds of weird internet dates for money. I know that because I'm one of them. Wanna get hitched?'

Not the suavest of plans.

The best course of action was to change subjects. When all else fails, turn to the weather.

"It's really hot out today." Shinsou pulled off his sweater revealing a black short sleeved shirt.

Kaminari wolf whistled, "Woah, nice muscles! It's a shame we have strict gun control 'cause dayuuum, those babies deserve to be seen."

Shinsou snorted, "You like muscles?"

"I like yours!" Denki winked.

Shinsou was blushing immensely and hoped Kaminari would just think it was from the sun. "Uh, thanks."

The blonde tugged on his arm, "Promise you'll hook me up with meeting Aizawa-sensei in the future? I wanna say thank you to him. He was the _best_. Or even just to say hello. I miss him a lot! It's been ages since I've spoken anyone from UA that wasn't the Bakusquad."

"Yeah, I'm surprised that Tsuyu and Ochako didn't recognize you. If you went to school together for a few months you'd think they would at least remember your distinctive appearance."

Denki shook his head, "Nah. I looked super different. Dyed all my hair black to get rid of the bolt in it, dressed in kind of muted tones, didn't have my ears pierced, and I was pretty short."

Shinsou gave him a condescending look, "What do you mean _was_?"

Kaminari laughed and lightly punched the other man's arm, "Oh, fuck off! We were having a moment, you bully."

Shinsou decided to take the chance to hold Kaminari's hand when it was dropped back down to his side. They clasped palms. "Are you okay with holding hands?"

Denki laughed, "We already are. You're a bit late to the party, big guy," and to answer the question more directly, Kaminari intertwined the other boy's fingers with his own.

The two walked on in silence, each enjoying the feeling of a warm hand against theirs. For such a small gesture it made things seem a lot more real than they had been.

The quiet wasn't the expectant kind. It was comforting to just feel close to someone while not being pressured to put on airs for another. Shinsou would have thought Kaminari hated silence but he seemed pretty happy just to be at his side.

Occasionally, the two would trade banter, but for the most part it was just warmth and quiet. These moments were made even better when Kaminari would lean over and feel Shinsou's biceps before making appreciative sounds. He fought hard to keep his mind out of the gutter.

It didn't take long till they reached the Aizawa-Yamada household, not that Kaminari knew it wasn't actually Shinsou's home, and the purple-haired man invited him upstairs. "Want a cup of coffee or something before your trip back to work?"

Kaminari batted his eyes coquettishly, "Oooh, already inviting me to your place for drinks? You must think I'm real easy huh? I'm super offended, bro."

Hitoshi made an embarrassed grimace, "Wait, that came out wrong. I meant just coffee. Like, the actual drink. Or tea. Not anything, you know...weird."

Denki fell into a small giggle fit. "I know, I know! Sorry! I just couldn't help myself. You're really cute when you're flustered."

Shinsou coughed nervously into his free hand and pulled Kaminari down towards his fathers' apartment. He knocked on the door, and Denki looked confused as to why he'd knock when he clearly owned the keys, but this was all cleared up by the scruffy and disgruntled man who answered the door.

Denki actually _shrieked_.

"Sensei?! Oh my god, Sensei!" Kaminari flew forward and wrapped his arms around Aizawa's waist in a very tight hug. Shinsou saw his father fall into a combat position for half a second before simply looking stunned. He eventually gave Denki a stunted pat on the back in return.

Shinsou didn't think that inviting his maybe-boyfriend back to his place would end up with said boyfriend in his dad's arms, but here they were.

When Kaminari stopped happily squealing he faced Shinsou with a huff, "Oh my gossssshhh! You just let me spend all that time gushing about how cool your dad is and you didn't say anything?!"

Hitoshi didn't even have the decency to look guilty about it, "Yep."

"You are the worst!" Kaminari quickly turned to his former teacher, "But, like, not _really_ the worst, Aizawa-sensei. Your kid is pretty cool. It totally makes sense now. You two have a similar vibe. That tired but mysterious loner thing. Plus, he kind of smiles like you, which is less weird now that I realize it's your fault."

Aizawa continued to stare at the blonde boy with strained eyes, but Shinsou could tell his father was probably relishing the chance to try and intimidate his student once again. Denki just smiled like nothing was wrong, and continued to talk.

"Hero Today wrote this article on you like, last month or something? It was super cool! They even had a blurry photo of you, but I'd recognize that slouchy posture anywhere. Did you read it? It included a poll about whether or not you sleep at night. Gonna be honest, the 'yes' answers were way less than the 'no' ones. Have you tried warm milk or something?"

The teacher gave a small groan, "I had hoped your energy would mellow with age but I think it's actually gotten worse."

Kaminari chuckled, "That's part of my brand, teach! Can I come in? I wanna see what your house looks like. I'm calling it now- you've got at least two cats."

Shinsou took the opportunity he'd wanted since he had found out the man was friends with Ground Zero, "Oh, you want to meet Bakugou and Midoriya?"

Denki looked at him quizzically, before Shinsou pushed past his dad and grabbed the blonde's hand to lead him into the house. Kaminari 'oooh-ed' at the furniture, piles of books, and the orderly stacks of CDs that littered the living room and the hallway. This 'ooh' turned into an 'awww!' at the sight of two cats fighting on the middle of a beat-up rug.

"The angry one is Bakugou and the little guy is Midoriya. Dad named them one year into teaching your class. I'm sure you can guess why."

Kaminari went to try and pet one, "Because they are freaking adorable and they just make you want to cuddle them?"

Aizawa snorted, "Outside of Kirishima, I think you're the only one who feels that way about Bakugou. How you two ended up friends I'll ever know."

Cat Midoriya wiggled out from under the angry paws of Cat Bakugou and planted himself in front of Kaminari for some head scratches.

All of the ruckus must have alerted his papa because they were suddenly greeted by the tallest, and loudest, blonde in the house.

"Is that you, Kaminari?!"

Denki looked up and squealed, "Mic-sensei!"

Midoriya Cat was abandoned as Kaminari ran to greet his teacher. The two blondes embraced in a tight hug, Hizashi slightly swinging the shorter man around, before their excitement turned into happy babbling.

"How have you been Mic-sensei? It's been literal _years_! Wow, you look great, dude."

Hizashi waved a hand demurely in front of him, "Oh stop! I'm not your teacher anymore and you don't have to flatter me."

"No man, I mean it! I still listen to your radio show too. Last week's lineup was killer."

Shinsou had no idea the two men would snap right back into their student and teacher behavior, with just a touch of looking like old friends. It made him really happy to see Denki and his papa so excited to reunite. Aizawa looked on with a bored expression, but also with the slightest curl of a smile- visible only to those who really knew him. He must have liked Kaminari a lot more than he'd let on. Hitoshi felt some pride that the guy he loved was special to his fathers too.

Shouta sighed and looked at his son, "Of all the boys you could have brought home it had to be the student with the lowest grades in my class?"

Denki whined back, "Hey! I was good at English, right Mic-sensei?"

The taller blonde nodded vigorously before replying with his signature, "Yeeeaaaaaaahhhh!"

Kaminari kept smiling but clamped his hands over his ears. He'd have to be around a lot more if he wanted to become immune to the shouting.

 _Hopefully he will be._

The two excited men separated from each other, reluctantly, and fell into a flurry of "What are you up to lately?", "Did you hear about what happened to so-and-so?", and, "Yes, Bakugou is still a little shit."

Aizawa put a heavy hand on Shinsou's shoulder and sighed, "Look, I understand that you being interested in the loud blonde type is probably my bad influence, but take your time with this. Don't make the same mistake I did."

Present Mic perked up, "Mistake? That's not what you were saying las-"

Shinsou scrambled towards his papa to try and cover his mouth, "Aaaand, we're stopping that there."

Kaminari doubled over in laughter, which didn't earn him any points by the look on Aizawa's face. "Kaminari," he spoke gravely, "I don't have to tell you what will happen if you hurt my son. I'm sure you can imagine the many ways I could _handle_ that situation. A relationship with him isn't a homework assignment. You have to put in the work this time."

Denki calmed himself down and wore a serious expression, "I promise I'll do everything I can to treat him right. I'm better with people than I'll ever be with math anyway, so that's not a fair comparison, but you can count on me, Sensei!"

Aizawa nodded solemnly, but Shinsou could tell that Kaminari was as scared as his dad hoped he would be. Serves the blonde's friends right. They can shovel talk Hitoshi all they want but everyone knows that you don't fuck with Aizawa. Forget erasing your quirk, he'll erase your _life_.

Hizashi put an arm around Denki's shoulders, "Come on, babe. He'll be fine! You know Kaminari doesn't have a mean bone in his body. Plenty of sassy ones, but he always meant well. He even tried to be friends with Mine-"

Aizawa cut him off, "We do not say that name in this household!"

Nobody argued, and from the stories his father had told him about the very unpleasant student, he understood why. To think that Kaminari tried to befriend such a person spoke to either bad taste or naivete. Perhaps it's both.

Kaminari stammered, "I-I mean, he wasn't like... _Endeavor_ levels of bad. Just gross!"

Aizawa scoffed, but bringing up the number 3 hero brought a smile to Present Mic's face.

"Has our darling baby told you about his fight with Endeavor?"

Denki's eyes went wide, "What? You fought Endeavor!? How are you still alive? He doesn't even have a problem hitting kids!"

Shinsou sighed, "Remember the burnt desk you sat at during parent-teacher conferences? I had just seen Todoroki-san. He didn't like it when I tried to describe what even vaguely caring for a child looks like."

Kaminari bounced over to him and grabbed his hands, "Ugh, why wasn't I earlier that day?! I could have seen the verbal beatdown of the century! You're even cooler now!"

Hizashi was beaming at how cute the couple looked, and Aizawa was mostly likely- begrudgingly- accepting the newest potential member of their family.

Denki squeezed Shinsou's hands one last time before looking turning towards Aizawa and averting his eyes to the floor. "I wanted to say I'm sorry, Sensei. I know I was a lot of trouble in class. I was way too hyper and not too smart. You had to deal with losing a pupil and then having to introduce a new one...I feel really bad that I put you through that."

Aizawa raised one brow, "If you didn't give me trouble you wouldn't be a student. That's what being a teacher means. Just ask Hitoshi."

"But I wasted so much of your time…"

"Do you feel it was a waste, Kaminari?"

The blonde frowned, "Of course not! You taught me so many important things, and I met my best friends there!"

The teacher shrugged, "Doesn't sound like a waste of time to me, then."

Denki wrung his hands together, "Aw man, you're so nice. I can't tell anybody about you being this sweet can I?"

"Not if you value your life."

Kaminari beamed anyway, "You're too good to me, teach. As much as I wish I had stayed, even if it was just to learn more from you and Mic-sensei, I'm glad that you helped me leave. I wasn't going to be the type of hero UA needed, and I didn't have the heart to seriously hurt anyone. Did the person who got my spot do well?"

Hizashi spoke proudly, "She's the number 7th hero now."

Denki lit up like a Christmas tree, "No way?! That's so cool! Are you telling me that Hush, the Librarian Hero, was my replacement? Oh man, she totally rocks!"

Shinsou squeezed the blonde's hand, "And technically you're responsible for her success."

Kaminari's cheeks must have hurt from all the smiling. "I guess I am, huh? Dude, today has been awesome! I had a super good date, then I got to see my old teachers, _and_ I made Hush a hero?! This world can't get any weirder."

Aizawa looked thoughtful, "I actually mentioned you to Shinsou a number of times back when I first started teaching you in middle school," he turned to address his son, "Kaminari is the one who broke the projector when he got the hiccups...every week."

Shinsou realized why that sounded familiar, "His niece practically did the same thing to me a couple of days ago."

Aizawa rubbed his forehead, "Oh dear god, it runs in the family. Tell me there aren't that many of you."

Denki started to count on his fingers, "We have me, my two sisters, one niece, plus my mom and dad. So it's only like, seven of us total."

Hizashi patted his head lightly, "Six, honey. It's 1+2+1+2. That makes six."

Kaminari went as pale as a sheet before stuttering, "I, uh...totally did that on purpose! I was just testing you!"

Shinsou couldn't stop himself from laughing.

Aizawa pinched the bridge of his nose, "Good to see you haven't stopped being a headache."

Kaminari beamed, "Just like old times, right sensei?"

"Yes. Just like old times. What a joy."

Hitoshi couldn't help himself and turned to his parents, "What's the dumbest thing Kaminari ever did in your class?"

"Shinsou!" Denki squealed, looking to Mic for help.

Aizawa answered without hesitation, "I couldn't possibly rank them in levels of stupidity, but my personal favorite was when I surprised him during a training exercise and he started to cry. Of course, water conducts electricity so he immediately zapped himself. Which means that in the space of three seconds I had that boy go from sobbing in fear to wandering around the training field giving thumbs up to the students who were desperately trying to continue their battles without hitting him."

Shinsou winced, "That sounds more like an example of your sadism than anything else."

His dad shrugged, "You asked."

Kaminari had sought refuge in Hizashi's arms. The taller blonde politely didn't add to the conversation, even though Shinsou was 100% sure he had plenty of stories to tell. Whatever, he'd get those out of him later.

The purple-haired man checked the time. He knew that Kaminari's stream was starting in an hour, and as much as he loved spending time with the man, he'd hate to get in the way of what he loved doing. Of course, selfishly, Shinsou also wanted to see if he'd mention the date. "What time do you need to get back?"

Denki pulled out his phone, "Oh kittens! I'm gonna be late for my shift. But I wanna stay with you guys too! Ugh, but I can't miss it. Can I come back someday?"

"Perish the thought," Aizawa deadpanned.

Hizashi arched an amused eyebrow, "To see us or to see Hitoshi?"

Kaminari batted his lashes, "Both?"

Aizawa sighed with dramatic exasperation before saying, "I suppose." His old man was such a drama queen. God forbid he let on to one of his students that he likes them.

Shinsou was definitely going to tease him about it later, but first he was going to escort Denki out of this room. He could not handle wishing the boy goodnight while his parents looked on in judgemental interest. "I don't actually live here, do you want me to walk to home?"

Kaminari gave a soft grin, "Nah. You seem like the introverted type and you look like you've had enough people-ing for the next three days. Besides, it won't take me long."

 _Fuck, he's so right._

Shinsou silently thanked him before adding, "Either way, I'm not going to stand in front of my parents while saying goodbye to you. Let me walk you to the door?"

Hizashi made an offended scoffing sound, but Denki just nodded and followed Shinsou down the hallway. "Bye-bye, EraserMic!" Hitoshi was definitely going to be asked to explain that joke to them later.

They reached the door and the two were _finally_ alone again.

"So, um…" Kaminari started first, "I had a lot of fun! Like, a lot. Not just seeing Mic-sensei and Aizawa-sensei. The most fun parts were with you. Though I totally liked seeing them as well! It was super nice of you to bring me here, dude."

Shinsou would have found the blonde's floundering cute if he wasn't just as flustered. "Yeah. It was nice. Seeing you, that is. You're welcome to visit any time. I know my parents and they definitely liked having you here. Ideally you'd want to spend time with me as well, but if you just want to see them I can make sure I'm not here the next time you come over."

Denki waved his arms in front of himself, "What? No way! You're like, 99.9% of the point! I really enjoyed our date, too. Can we, uh..do it again sometime?"

"I'd like that. A lot." Shinsou was worried that he was so happy his smile might have hit the Aizawa-grin level. Considering the other man didn't flinch at the mere sight of him it probably didn't get that far.

Kaminari had that especially bright look in his eyes, and Shinsou was completely lost in them. So much so that he didn't notice the kiss on his cheek until Denki nervously jumped back from it.

Hitoshi would do him one better.

The purple-haired boy leaned over slightly and cupped the side of Kaminari's soft face in one hand. He brushed a lock of hair behind his ear before pressing his lips to the other man's. It wasn't as quick as the kiss on his cheek had been, but it was still pretty short. It seemed the both of them had to work on their nerves.

"Whoa," Denki said dumbly.

Looking at the sweet blush and wide eyes in front of him took away any last vestige of his suave, and Shinsou murmured, "Yeah. Um, goodnight? I'll text you?"

Kaminari was practically vibrating with excitement, "Yes Cat."

Hitoshi closed the door in his face and heard laughter from behind it.

When he turned to go back he saw a fleeting arc of blonde hair disappear from the hallway. Upon returning to the room, Shinsou leveled a glare at Hizashi, "You saw the whole thing, didn't you?"

The blonde man tried to look innocent but was wearing the worst shit-eating grin he'd seen in a while.

"That's beside the point." Aizawa looked at him sternly, "Hitoshi. What the hell is an 'EraserMic'?"

Thank you so much to everyone who has commented so far! I do a happy butt waggle every time I see one 3.


	12. Chapter 12

The second Shinsou got home- after gleefully explaining his parent's ship name to a very amused Hizashi and a much less amused Aizawa- he pulled up Ch4rgeb0lt's stream. Yes, he was early but he couldn't resist seeing if he was mentioned tonight.

Upon logging in he saw MeatMeOutBack29 was already, unsurprisingly, present. Along with a few others who Shinsou hadn't bothered memorizing the names of.

Meat immediately sent a message directed at Hitoshi, _"Don't you think you're getting too close to him? If this is a bid for admin privileges I'm not sharing."_

If Shinsou's online persona was a bit meaner he might have answered with a loving, "bitch please," but today was not that day.

 _"I'm not after your admin spot. Trust me."_

 _"But you are after Ch4rgeb0lt?"_

Shinsou snorted, _"That's literally all of us, but okay."_ If he had to get into a fight with this man he gladly would. He got to be a lot braver online and it was incredibly therapeutic. He decided to enjoy himself further, _"Feeling threatened?"_

MeatMeOutBack29 responded in a heartbeat, "I already know I'm his favorite. Enjoy your delusions of grandeur."

Oh now it's fucking _on_.

 _"So frequently paying extra money for his vocal affection makes you his favorite? Cute. You must think really little of him. As expected of someone who thinks he's the most loved. He routinely mentions he doesn't have a favorite, and I trust him. Unlike some people, apparently."_

Another member of the chat added, " _OH SHIT. WANT SOME ICE FOR THAT BURN?!_ " and Shinsou couldn't have felt any prouder. Plus, he actually did want to defend Denki. The man frequently says that everybody here was family/friend/bae and precious to him. It was one of the things that Hitoshi enjoyed about the boy- he never left anyone out of his affection and kindness. Even the weirder ones.

MeatMeOutBack29 took a fair amount of time to answer, _"Defend him all you want, but I was here long before you even joined. He and I have an intimate history. I think I know him better."_

Shinsou fired back, _"Did you just pull the hipster 'I liked them before they were cool' card? Wow. That's just embarrassing."_

It also took every ounce of restraint in his body to not mention that he'd been kissing their beloved Ch4rgeb0lt just an hour ago. Not that anyone in the chat would believe him.

They were distracted from trading further insults by the flicker of the stream going live. Ch4rgeb0lt was all smiles as he adjusted his webcam, "Hey, loves! Bright and early tonight, I see?"

Almost all at once usernames flooded the chat telling Denki to look at the history and read about the battle between viewers. The most interesting person who was ratting them out decided to deliver the news by saying, _"Ch4rgeb0lt! Mommy and Daddy are fighting!"_

Like Shinsou would ever choose to associate himself with that meat asshole.

Kaminari scrunched his eyebrows together as he read over the fight that occurred. There was a moment where his mouth turned up on one side in subtle amusement, which Shinsou felt was probably because of something he said, but for the most part, the man looked fairly distressed.

Ch4rgeb0lt sighed, typed some things into his computer, gave a few clicks of his mouse, and leaned back with his arms crossed. His pout was pretty cute, but Hitoshi still felt bad.

 **MeatMeOutBack29 has had their admin privileges revoked.**

The chat burst into a series of: _"Oh shit!", "The end of an era!", "Oooooh you're in trouble!"_ and Shinsou's personal favorite, _"Down with meat! This stream is_ Vegetarian _!"_

Denki looked sad. More disappointed perhaps, than anything else. It hurt to see and know he'd taken part in that. "Sorry, Meat. At least for now, Okay? I won't allow anyone to be mean to each other. That goes for you too, Mindwash. I'm glad you recognize that I love everyone here, but hurting feelings doesn't solve anything in the long run."

Shinsou couldn't stop himself from adding, _"Even if it feels really good?"_

Kaminari laughed, though he recognized he shouldn't and soon composed himself, before saying, "Yeah, even if it feels really good. I think bathing in ramen sounds like it'd feel pretty good, but the inevitable burns? I ain't Todoroki- I couldn't rock the 3rd degree like he does."

The chat dissolved into laughter and appreciation, one person even typing _"I'd love you even if you were just a giant scab!"_ which even Denki responded to with an affectionate but thoroughly grossed out, "Ewwww! Dude, I love you too but that's mega nasty."

It didn't take long for the conversation to slip into its usual funny and lighthearted tone. Denki spent approximately three minutes trying to balance a chopstick, his new glittery yellow ones, on the tip of his nose. He was failing extravagantly, but having the time of his life. Whenever he would giggle the chopstick would fall, dangerously close to his eyes- and Shinsou expressed this concern only for it to be laughed off in a teasing manner ("I only have eyes for you all, anyway!").

Though the chat had started off on a negative note (no thanks to MeatMeOutBack29, who Shinsou decided should take all of the blame) the blonde seemed to be in a pretty good mood. A little giddy even. Hitoshi thought he'd take his chances and ask more, especially since he had learned that Denki always answers his messages.

 _"How was your day?"_

Ch4rgeb0lt's smile was all teeth and his eyes crinkled with happiness.

 _"That good, huh? Did something go well with your job as the coolest barista ever?"_

Denki blushed and averted his eyes for a moment, before answering, "I had a really great time with a friend today. But don't get jealous, my dears! It's a totally different thing. Team Bae can rest easy tonight," followed by a wink and a thumbs up.

The expected whining of _"No fair!", "Will you leave us if you make new friends?"_ , and the very uncomfortable addition, _"Did this person pay you too? What would I have to pay to get that?"_

Ch4rgeb0lt looked worried right away, "Never! I could never abandon you folks. You are all precious to me and I wouldn't leave you behind for allllll the world. So there!"

The chat then became a series of _"3" s_ and the like. He always was good at comforting the particularly attached fans.

The thought brought up a topic that Shinsou hadn't really considered before. What would it be like to date someone who played pretend lover for sixty-something people every night? Would he be comfortable with sharing Denki like that? Shinsou knew he was a possessive guy. He grew up with very little to call his own so whatever was his was infinitely precious. He had to hold it close or it would go away, just like so many things did. Even being raised by the most loving parents ever hadn't managed to get rid of that emotional reflex. It scared him a little, but he also wouldn't want to take Kaminari away from what he loves to do… He felt like he was at a bit of an impasse.

When he shook himself out of his thoughts he saw Ch4rgeb0lt making a concerned expression. It wasn't quite fear but it was certainly discomfort. He was obviously trying to hide it, but even he couldn't cover up looking so unsettled.

Shinsou read through the chat to look for whatever might have caused it when he came across an eerie post by a user fittingly named 'Insan1ty'.

 _"I saw you the other day. I waited for you outside but you never came out again? I only stayed a couple of hours but I thought I'd walk you home since the streets can be dangerous at night. You're even more beautiful in person! I hope I can get the courage to talk to you next time. 3 3 3!"_

Hitoshi realized this person didn't see Denki leave the cafe since the blonde lives upstairs. Which this stalker hopefully won't realize anytime soon.

Ch4rgeb0lt spoke up, "Hey, Insan1ty, I'm glad that it made you happy to see me, but it isn't okay to contact me outside of here. I certainly don't mix my stream life with my personal life, and definitely not my work life. Could you be super awesome and not come by my work anymore? I don't want to have to ban you from the stream, but if you keep up this behavior I'm not going to have a choice."

Extremely democratic, as expected of the blonde, but not nearly straight forward enough.

Shinsou put in his two cents, _"That is absolutely not okay. Stalking Ch4rgeb0lt is an abuse of his trust in us, and if you love him as much as you say you do you will respect his boundaries. It is completely unacceptable to treat him this way, and in case you couldn't tell you freaked him out."_

Surprisingly MeatMeOutBack29 added, _"I despise agreeing with MindWash, but I wholeheartedly concur. This kind of behavior is against all policies listed on Ch4rgeb0lt's website, as well as an example of stalking. I will not hesitate to get the police involved, and I have a large number of connections to some notable heroes. It's best for everyone's sake if you stop immediately."_

Hitoshi had to admit it was well-said.

Insan1ty wrote back, _"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to scare you Ch4rgeb0lt. I was just so happy to see you in real life. I wanted to hold your hand and give you a hug. Maybe a kiss on the cheek? That's what people who date do, so it only seemed fair. You always say that we're dating so I don't understand why I can't date you in real life too. I apologize for upsetting you. I love you very much."_

Kaminari flinched but did his best to put on a smile, "Well thank you for apologizing, but I repeat that I don't make any contact with viewers outside of the stream. That kind of dating is very different, but I understand this can be confusing. If you promise to leave me alone at work I'll forgive all of it, okay?"

The chat wisely, in Shinsou's opinion, spoke extensively against that idea. Kaminari had always been too nice for his own good, and Hitoshi hoped it didn't come back to bite him. Not that he'd let that happen to the blonde if it did.

Insan1ty wrote back, _"I'll be good. I'll just watch. It's cool as long as I don't talk to you right?_ Lol _You're so nice! Are photos okay? I'll share them with the stream :)"_

Shinsou was about to express his extreme displeasure when MeatMeOutBack29 posted, _"May I do the honors, Ch4rgeb0lt?"_

Denki sighed heavily, "It's all yours, Meat."

 **MeatMeOutBack29 has been given admin privileges.**

 **Insan1ty has been banned from the stream.**

A number of people cheered, and it quickly lightened up the room. Kaminari seemed much more relaxed.

"Problem solved! I hope...but you guys will protect me! At least one of you has to be a secret government agent with mad hacking skills, right?"

The stream sent their "lol"s and Denki continued to play the joker to fix the mood. He slurped his noodles loudly and showed off a drawing he'd made of Eraserhead (which was surprisingly really good. Shinsou quickly screenshotted it. His dads will freak later).

After this whole debacle, Shinsou will definitely be coming around Amped Up more often. He'll bring this to his father if he has to. No one does better underground work than his dad.

In the end, what this whole night really proved was that Hitoshi had to tell Denki the truth as soon as possible. He can't be there to protect him if he has to pretend not to know. Yes, he didn't want this to be the way it happened but damned if he was going to sit back and watch his (hopefully) boyfriend be threatened like that.

Shinsou learned from his dad that you just don't fuck with the Aizawas, and Hitoshi was more than happy to prove he was one of them.

In honor of lightening the situation, Shinsou noticed that Ch4rgeb0lt had gone 15 minutes past his usual end time. The purple-haired man was sure it was because he didn't want to end on a weird note. What mattered most is that his 'friends and lovers' were happy.

Denki must have noticed it too, because his sentence was interrupted by an adorable yawn, "Guess it's that time again, everybody! Stay safe and," Kaminari kissed his fingertips with a loud smack before pressing them up to his camera, "until next time...Zap you later!"

Shinsou held his own kissed fingers up to the screen over Denki's face. He may have gotten a real kiss earlier, but he would take every bit of love he could get. Hitoshi closed his laptop and hugged it against his chest. He was still a bit worried about the strange viewer, but he knew Kaminari could take care of himself if the worst happened. He'd heard just how strong his electricity could get.

Hitoshi felt for the cell in his pocket and considered texting the blonde. That was proper date etiquette, right? It wouldn't seem weird to text him right after his stream ended?

Either way, the man couldn't help himself.

 **You:** Did you get home safely?

He sat with bated breath until the phone buzzed.

 **Denki:** yup! all good n safe. ur such a gentleman!

Shinsou released a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding.

 **You:** It's called basic manners. I tried to suggest them to Endeavor but... well, you saw how that went.

 **Denki:** stil makes u the coolest dude evr! bummed that i missed it. u shud do it again!

 **You:** Next time you see me I'll have to re-enact it with Todoroki. He loves doing impressions of his father. It involves a lot of fiery beards and 'harumph'-ing.

 **Denki:** how do u kno every1?!

 **Denki:** am i going to have to show every hero i meet that photo of ur cute dumb face?

 **You:** Not sure if I should be offended or not. Damn you, and your complimentary insult.

 **Denki:** (^.~)

 **You:** What an incredibly eloquent comeback.

 **Denki:** we cant all b shakespeer

 **Denki:** but i did got u this cat (^◕ᴥ◕^)

 **You:** In that case, all is forgiven. Now go to bed. You mentioned you have work early in the morning.

 ** **You:** **How can you draw cats in lattes if you're falling asleep in them?

 **Denki:** tryin 2 get me into bed huh?

 **You:** You know what I mean!

 **Denki:** only if u go to bed 2! ur eyebags could doubl as a purse

 **You:** How did you know that's what I use them for? It's exhausting being so fashionable.

 **Denki:** lol ur the best. now im going to get u in2 bed (^_~)

 **Denki:** for real tho if i gotta sleep im taking u with me

 **Denki:** did that sound weird?

 **Denki:** big oof.

 **Denki:** boof?

 **You:** Goodnight, Denki. Sweet dreams.

 **Denki:** u 2!

 **Denki:** (*¯ ³¯*)

Denki was so freaking cute. He took a moment to look at the photo for his contact. Hitoshi, in an embarrassing display of affection, booped his nose against the screen of his phone. Apparently, he was at cat levels of displaying affection. He blames his dad.  
He was going to tell him tomorrow. Not just who he was, but how much Kaminari meant to him, Even if that means doing it in front of his equally terrifying, but well-intentioned, squad. If that doesn't prove how much he loves the guy then nothing will. No matter how weird the night started, Shinsou wasn't afraid. He knew that between Denki's own abilities, his crazy friends, and Hitoshi himself, that everything would be ok. Love finds a way in the end, and it was about damn time that Shinsou told Kaminari just how much he meant to him.

 _Moment of truth, here I come._

 _SKSKSKSKKSKSKSKKSKSKSKKSKSKSKKSKSKSKSKSKSKSKKSKSK_

ASailorSoldier did an astoundingly perfect fanart for this fic. (Take out the spaces) You can see it here: twitter asailorsoldier/status/ 1092416338339913729  
She does a lot of ShinKami stuff so go get your fix!


	13. Chapter 13

It's a blessing that elementary schools close in the afternoon because Hitoshi could barely focus on teaching his classes. He'd nearly let Shigaraki touch Toga with no gloves on. Dabi, obviously still thankful for the verbal beating his father had gotten, stepped in and solved it with a fireball to the face of both parties- which might not have been great in general but it was still a better outcome than rotting a little girl's face away because she wouldn't share her markers.

Kids these days.

The purple-haired man had never packed his things up so fast. He was as eager to simply see Denki as much as he was happy to finally get this off his chest. Just thinking about it was eating away at him.

He texted his friends in hopes of receiving support.

 **You:** I'm going to tell Denki I know about Ch4rgeb0lt today.

Surprisingly, Izuku wrote back first.

 **Midoriya:** Oh! The camboy, right?

 **Tsuyu:** Yeah, the one who has sex on camera for a hundred people. Remember?

 **Midoriya:** Wait, I thought you said he…?

 **Uraraka:** Damnit Tsu! It's not like that! It's more like he's the internet version of a glory hole but it's just for holding hands.

 **You:** How do you ALWAYS manage to make it sound worse?

 **Tsuyu:** How about you stop talking to my cute GIRLFRIEND and go get your man!

 **You:** Girlfriend? We're definitely revisiting this later.

 **You:** Also, why do you always steal my gay thunder?

 **Uraraka:** 3.

 **Midoriya:** What's a glory hole?

 **Tsuyu:** Google it.

Hitoshi refused to take part in that conversation. Izuku was going to grow up someday, with or without his interference. He was also happy his friends were dating, but right now he had to focus on getting his own love life on the right track. One awkward confession at a time.

Shinsou rushed down the various streets and spied Amped Up from across the road. He took a deep breath to center himself. He was going to tell him today. Hitoshi had spent half the night rehearsing different ways of saying it, and he thinks he's finally got the right one.

The bell signaled his entrance, and four pairs of eyes looked up.

With the exception of Kaminari, the entirety of the Bakusquad was there. Bakugou sitting at a table with a variety of writing utensils and a large piece of sketching paper in front of him. Kirishima sat across from his boyfriend sipping a sugary looking beverage. Sero and Mina were taking turns between manning the cash register and filling the display case with mouth-watering pastries.

Bakugou was the only one who didn't smile upon seeing him, and Shinsou was completely unsurprised.

"There he is," Mina cried, "The smoothest cat to ever win over our precious Pikachu!"

Kirishima greeted him with an upbeat, "Yeah! I don't know what you did during your date but it worked. He's been all lovestruck since yesterday."

Bakugou didn't lift his eyes from the page he was sketching on, and casually gave Hitoshi the finger.

 _What a sweet man._

Shinsou looked quizzically at the heroic duo, "Do you two live here?"

Katsuki looked up and sneered, "No, dumbass. Our apartment is on the other fucking side of town. We crash at Denki and Jirou's when we're close."

"And for the free food!" Kirishima added.

Bakugou scoffed, "My cooking is a hundred times better than this shit."

"A hundred times worse than your food is still pretty good, babe." Kirishima was certainly skilled at saying the right things to his boyfriend. It was subtle but Bakugou puffed his chest up into a self-satisfied posture upon hearing the compliment. Shinsou would have called it cute but he'd hate to lose his life right before getting a chance to be honest with Denki about who he was.

Sero waved to get his attention, "Is it true that I missed the part where we threatened your life?"

Kirishima had the decency to look guilty, "We got him super good, but uh...sorry, bro."

Bakugou looked unsettlingly pleased, "Want us to do it again? I'm game."

Shinsou felt his throat go dry, "I think I got the point the first time, thanks."

The rest of the squad shrugged, but he had a feeling this conversation wasn't over for good. He might as well get to his point before it circles back. "Any idea when Kaminari will be here?"

Mina stroked an invisible beard thoughtfully, "I'm not sure if I should tell you...do you think he's earned the right to know, guys?"

Kirishima clapped his hands gleefully, "No way! Make him work for it!"

 _The shit I do for Denki…_

Sero grabbed a large nearby tablecloth, pulling a hood over himself with it like some cheap copy of a witch costume, and screeched an eerie, "Answer me these questions three!"

"Are you two really fucking doing this right now?" If Bakugou could feel shame then this would be the time for it. His squad was stellar at embarrassing themselves.

Mina grabbed another tablecloth and did the same, cackling a cartoon witch laugh as she swooped in next to Sero.

The two idiots stood in front of the purple-haired man with great excitement on their faces.

Shinsou sighed, "Alright. What are the questions? Are we doing Monty Python rules or is this a legitimate exchange?"

Mina spoke first, voice still high pitched "What...Is Denki's favorite food?"

"Easy. It's ramen. That all you got?"

Sero swished the ends of his tablecloth dramatically, as though it were a cape, "What...is Bakugou's least favorite thing?"

"Everything. Except maybe Kirishima and you guys- depending on the day."

A grunt of, "Damn right," could be heard from the table Katsuki was sitting at. He'd been watching intently from the corner of his eye.

Mina cursed under her breath, clearly not expecting him to do this well, "What… did I have for breakfast today?"

Sero made an excited chuffing noise and gave the girl a high-five.

Shinsou deadpanned, "A brownie, and you didn't even eat all of it."

Mina threw down her tablecloth in fury, "How the hell did you even know that?!"

Hitoshi pointed to her cheek, "It's literally written on your face. You missed a bunch."

"Boooooo!" Sero howled from underneath his makeshift cape, but Kirishima looked delighted.

"Aw dude, that was killer! He's upstairs. His shift isn't for another 20 minutes. Wanna go up and scare the crap out of him? I'll take you!"

Sero and Mina immediately got over their loss at the chance to prank their beloved friend. "Ooh, ooh, ooh! Yes! Do we cover our faces in icing and leap out from around a corner?"

"Mina, that's stupid," Thank goodness Sero wasn't as ridiculous, "obviously we should tape three cupcakes to the doorway right around where his face would be, and call him over. Wham bam delicious, fam."

Nevermind. Sero is also insane.

An empty paper cup sailed past Shinsou's face, clearly intended to only miss him by an inch, and he turned to see Bakugou sitting there with his usual frown. "If you want to make Discount Pikachu piss himself you don't have to go that far. That little shit got scared of his own shadow yesterday. Just exist near him suddenly and you'll have that fucker crying."

Apparently, this squad operated on different definitions of "friendship" then Shinsou was familiar with.

The three scheming squad members grinned at each other in response and took off towards the kitchen at a run. If they continued to be as loud as they were Kaminari was going to hear them coming a mile away.

Kirishima stopped right before the doorway and turned around to grab Hitoshi's forearm. "Come on!"

He was quickly dragged through a small but orderly kitchen, and then led up a creaky wooden staircase with banisters that had been painted a baby blue. The Bakusquad members were giggling to themselves and then loudly shushing each other.

The pink girl looked positively devilish in her glee. She tugged on Hitoshi's sleeve to get his attention and whispered, "You should be the one to do it, Yes Cat Man!"

Shinsou shot her a look, "Still don't remember my name, do you?"

She shook her head no, with a smile.

Sero waved their conversation off, "Details like that don't matter. What matters is that if you want to earn yourself another Bakusquad point you're going to be the one to shock Denki. Get it?"

 _Ugh._

The four stopped at the doorway and Shinsou observed his future victim.

Kaminari was folding laundry, and of course most of the clothes were garish colors and animal prints, while softly humming to himself. The man was wearing a pair of green shorts, that Shinsou was pretty sure he'd seen him wear on one of his streams and holy crap those are short, as well as a white tank top. It was a sweet and innocent image and shit, I'm totally about to ruin it, aren't I?

The purple-haired man turned to look at the doorway and saw the three others peeking around the corner, egging him on with their expressions, before disappearing behind it.

Shinsou crept forward stealthily, reached out his hand, and rested it gently on the blonde's bare shoulder.

Denki shrieked at a decibel Present Mic would be proud of.

"SON OF A BASKET MONKEY!"

Immediately afterward this was followed by a huge shockwave that knocked Shinsou back a couple of feet, throwing him against the wall and rattling the bookshelf next to him. He could feel his skin tingling and the ends of Denki's bangs were sticking straight up. The TV that had been playing a movie was now nothing but static.

Kaminari whipped around to see them, "SWEET MOTHER OF FISHSTICKS! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!"

Shinsou twitched from the electricity still in his system, and then turned to the group that was in hysterics right outside of the door, "You knew that was going to happen, didn't you?"

Kirishima wore a guileless grin, "Duh! Why do you think we wanted you to be the one to do it? I've gotten zapped enough for a lifetime, dude."

Kaminari stood there dizzily fretting but too afraid to touch Hitoshi with the electricity still buzzing around his fingers. "Oh, man! You guys are the worst! Shit, I'm so sorry 'Toshi! But I'm also not sorry because you were part of it! Oh my gosh! I trusted you, Captain Yes Cat!"

Shinsou did feel a little bad about it, but he had to agree with the Bakusquad. Denki was very amusing when he was startled.

 _Who even says 'sweet mother of_ fishsticks _' anyway?_

Apparently, Kaminari.

Hitoshi spoke regretfully, "I may have allowed myself to be convinced that this was a good idea."

Denki's shoulders slouched and he sighed, "I can't even get mad. The number of times I've said that exact sentence because of these jerks is endless ." The blonde shot him a shy smile, "It is kinda cute that you're playing with my friends though."

Shinsou looked disturbed, " This is your definition of playing? You broke your television."

Kaminari gave the TV a passing glance before hitting it across the top. The picture came back on after a moment of flashing lights, "Not the first time I've shorted this sucker, and it won't be the last. That's why I don't get a new one! What's the word Jirou used? Economizing?"

Mina finally managed to catch her breath and walked into the room. "Aw man, I can't believe Bakugou missed that!"

"Oh, he definitely heard it," Kirishima chirped.

"As did everyone in a mile radius," Sero chuckled.

Denki just pouted, "Whose fault do you think that was?"

The goofy trio chorused, "Ours" in the cheeriest of tones, and Shinsou could understand why Bakugou either loved or hated them depending on the hour.

Once his fingers had stopped spasming from the shock, Hitoshi walked up to Kaminari. The purple-haired man was anxiously rubbing the back of his neck when he mumbled, "I, um...came by to say hello."

Denki snorted loudly, "You have a hell of a way of greeting people. Did Aizawa-sensei teach you those sick stealth skills?"

Sero laughed, "Honestly, I thought we were being incredibly loud. You're so deaf, Denki."

Mina jumped in with, "Why don't you get your boooyyyfriend to check your ears for you?"

Kaminari blushed and sputtered, "He's not my boyfriend! I mean, I don't think so?" he looked at Hitoshi, "Are we dating?"

 _Well fuck._

"That's...an excellent question. Maybe we could talk about it? But, you know, when it's just the two of us?"

Mina started to inhale loudly, in preparation for some gross remark before Denki cut her off. "If you're about to make any kind of sex joke I'm going to Detroit Smash you."

"Boooo!" She hollered in return, and Kirishima laughed but still patted her back with sympathy.

Kaminari shooed off the rest of his squad, threatening Sero with sparking fingers in order to hasten the process.

Once they were alone, the quiet was heavy. Neither seemed to know what to say and Shinsou could feel his heartbeat start to race.

Denki broke the silence first, "Want me to make us a cup of coffee while we talk?" We have our own kitchen up here so we wouldn't have to go downstairs with everybody else."

"Yes thanks."

 _It's official. I have no game._

Kaminari smiled, loosely grabbed the other man's hand, and led him out the door and down a hallway. The kitchen was a homey affair with too many mugs, ancient looking teacups, and some slightly dying plants. It still managed to be all warm lights and soft chairs at the same time. Shinsou sat down while Denki went to work.

A pot had already been made recently- right before they had scared a year off of the blonde's life- so Kaminari only had to warm it back up. He picked up a marker and a mug, and jokingly turned back to Hitoshi while pretending he was about to write something, "And what name would you like put on it, good sir?"

"MindWash."

Denki dropped the mug.

The handle broke when it hit the floor, and the boy's yellow eyes were as wide as the saucers beneath their many teacups.

"You... You !?" The blonde took three steps back towards the doorway

Hitoshi anxiously began, "I can explain! Honestly, it was just an incredibly bizarre coincidence that I even met you in the first place," but Kaminari had quickly turned and bolted down to the cafe.

Shinsou leaped up to chase after him. He really could have delivered that in a better fashion, but it was too late now. Kaminari meant too much to him for this to end things. They'd work this out.

Somehow.

By the time he got down the stairs, Denki was crouched down and fuming from behind a pile of freshly brought out muffins. He had apparently decided to go for a hiding technique but chose an extremely visible spot to crawl into.

Thank fuck there wasn't anyone but the Bakusquad in the cafe. It was bad enough to have them see it. The three pranksters froze, and Bakugou raised a threatening but curious eyebrow.

Shinsou walked carefully forward, "Denki…"

A blueberry muffin struck him on the shoulder, while the blonde babbled angrily, "I knew it! Things felt weird and you seemed so familiar but I didn't think...I mean, how could you just...did you think I was too stupid to figure it out? I hope you got a good laugh out of it, you dick! Get out!"

Mina interrupted, "He's a paying customer, Denks."

Kaminari stood up from crouching behind the muffins and pointed an accusatory finger at Hitoshi, "He's a paying asshole is what he is!"

Sero happily butt in, "Do we finally get to kill the cat guy? I missed the killing talk, already. At least let me be part of the murder team." Thankfully no one engaged him further.

"I'm sorry, Denki. Do you think you could ever forgive me?" Shinsou plead.

The blonde's nose scrunched up, "I dunno. Even if I do I'm reserving the right to bring this up in any and all future arguments!" Kaminari started to bite nervously at his fingernails, "You're lucky that I like MindWash so much. But, why didn't you just say something sooner?"

Shinsou frowned, feeling defensive and quite literally attacked if that earlier muffin throw was anything to go by. "Hey, you didn't tell me about being Ch4rgeb0lt either."

Kaminari puffed his cheeks in frustration, "What was I supposed to say? You'd think I was weird!"

"That's exactly why I didn't say anything!" Shinsou shouted.

The blonde deflated and looked at the floor with a pout. "Ugh, I hate it when you make a good point."

Hitoshi walked closer and reached out to hold one of the boy's hands in his own. "Denki...we both went about this incorrectly."

Kaminari shot him a glare.

"Okay, I went about this incorrectly. The point is we can work through it, right? I really like you. Like, really like you. Please give me another chance?"

Sero frowned, "So it's a 'no' to the whole killing him situation?"

Denki still looked suspicious. He spoke hesitantly, "Why did you decide to tell me now? You know I don't like mixing my stream with my personal life. I don't know how okay I am with this. I believed you when you said it was an accident, but how am I supposed to react when you say that? I was scared, you know?"

Shinsou took a step closer, slowly trying to embrace him without startling another fit of anger. "I almost just gave up...I thought I'd never tell you and get away with having you and Ch4rgeb0lt both, the same way you'd still have me and MindWash. But then that weird guy on the stream...the one who said he saw you at the cafe? I wasn't about to let him mess with you, and I couldn't keep a good enough watch on this place if I was pretending I didn't know what was really going on." The purple-haired man got close enough to bring Denki into a proper hug and rested his head on top of the other boy's. "I had originally planned a proper speech where I'd ease you into things but my mouth just started moving before I could catch it." He sighed, "You seem to have that effect on me."

Hitoshi felt a breath of laughter against his neck. "Can you not be sweet and funny when I'm trying to be angry at you?"

"Not if it's working."

Kaminari whined, "You're taking all the bitch wind out of my rage sails!"

Shinsou pressed his face into soft blonde hair, "That's the plan, Kitten."

"Oof," Kirishima called out, "a one-two punch with a nickname on top? Game over, Den."

"I'm really bad at staying angry at you," Kaminari sounded incredibly annoyed, "but I do understand...I still wish you'd told me sooner, though."

"I wish I did too, but do you think if I told you right away that you would have even let me take you on a date?"

Denki pushed his face harder into Shinsou's neck and groaned, "Probs not…"

Hitoshi smiled, "In that case, I guess it all worked out."

Bakugou slammed his fist down on the table, "All worked out my ass. What's this bullshit about some fuckhead bothering Dunce Face?"

"Yeah," Kirishima added, "I was wondering what you meant by that."

Kaminari, still doing his best to seem angry, pushed himself away from Shinsou. He knew there was no getting away from the squad when they wanted answers, no matter how badly he didn't want to worry them. "Someone on the stream said they saw me at the cafe. They said stuff about wanting to walk me home and kiss me on the cheek and a bunch of weird things like that. I told them that it wasn't okay but they wouldn't stop. We had to ban them."

The room was quiet and then all hell broke loose.

Mina growled and knocked over a tall stack of cups, Sero slammed a fist down on the wooden counter, Kirishima was gnashing his shark teeth, and Bakugou was terrifyingly still.

"This cocksucker is about to have a serious problem."

Denki looked at Bakugou with hope in his eyes, "You really think you can catch him?"

"Of course we'll catch this bastard. I'm fucking Ground Zero!"

Red Riot frowned, "I thought _I_ was fucking Ground Zero?"

Bakugou let his forehead hit the table, "Goddamnit, Kirishima."


	14. Chapter 14

Though his scowl looked somewhat more like a smirk, Denki narrowed his eyes at Shinsou, "Don't think I'm not still kinda angry, though. You owe me the chance to get one good slap across your cheek!"

Hitoshi grimaced, "Will it make you feel better?"

Kaminari was all smiles, "Infinitely."

"Alright...go ahead," and Shinsou braced himself with his eyes squeezed shut.

The next thing he felt was a light kiss on his cheek and then a rush of air from hysterical laughing.

He opened his eyes again to see Denki nearly doubled over, "You should have seen the stupid look on your face! Oh man, that was awesome."

Hitoshi let out a breath of relief, "So you aren't going to revenge-slap me?"

Kaminari smirked, "Oh I'm definitely still doing that, but when I getcha I'm not going to tell you it's coming! I'm no amateur."

Bakugou was clearly disappointed that Shinsou hadn't gotten hit, but Hitoshi was sure he'd be over the moon whenever it did happen. Not that anyone would be able to tell it from his face.

Kirishima stretched his arms over his head and grunted loudly, "Mmkay. Time for us manly heroes to go save the day!" He extended a hand out for Bakugou to take, and though the man clearly didn't need the assistance he took it anyway. The look they shared as their hands clasped seemed meaningful, and Hitoshi hoped one day he and Kaminari would look at each other like that.

The two pros said their goodbyes, which meant Bakugou ignored them in favor of slouching and walking out while Kirishima gave a series of hugs before running after his boyfriend.

Shinsou had nearly forgotten the two were heroes considering how frequently they crashed at the cafe. Anyone could see that the five of them were close-knit, but he hadn't realized just how much love there must be between them. Even Hitoshi's friends weren't like that, and he'd consider them pretty dear to him.

He had heard that the first few months of UA were beyond traumatizing for all involved, some more than others, so it was unsurprising how desperately, but happily, they clung to each other. Being considered an honorary member, though it was probably said somewhat jokingly, was quite the compliment. Shinsou had no clue what Denki must have said to them, but he had managed to potentially earn the group's trust. He's hoping his recent confession didn't ruin that. Kaminari was still angry, and rightfully so, but seemed to know that it truly was coincidence and that he meant no harm. He certainly couldn't be the worrisome viewer, Insan1ty, considering how violently he'd reacted to the person upsetting his boyfriend.

Wait. _Shit._ They never actually finished the conversation, thanks to his incredibly smooth timing, about their relationship status. What were they?

"Kaminari," Shinsou began, "Would you be open to finishing the talk we were having before I thoroughly ruined the mood?"

It took Denki a moment before he remembered what the man was talking about. "Oh, yeah! I totally forgot about that," he turned to look at a gleeful and _very_ interested Mina and Sero, who Denki frowned at, "and we are definitely not doing this in front of them."

The two squad members expressed their displeasure through unhappy groans and whining, but Kaminari stood his ground. "Nuh-uh. Last time I _almost_ had a date you two started to loudly debate the color of Kirishima's pubic hair."

Shinsou almost wanted to ask what color they had decided on but agreed it would most definitely change the tone of the night...and he'd done that more than enough already.

"Alright, fine," Sero huffed, "Go be lovey-dovey and find out another horrible secret! Like that Shinsou is actually behind that time you short-circuited yourself and ended up falling asleep face first in the display case." The black haired boy looked directly at Shinsou, "We ended up cleaning cupcake icing out of his hair the whole rest of the day."

Denki shoved his snickering friend to the side as he made his way towards the kitchen, hip-checking him a good foot to the left while the man laughed. The blonde looked over his shoulder and gestured in front of him, "C'mon slowpoke!" he paused, "Which totally isn't the pokemon I think you look like- you strike me as more of a Gengar kind of guy."

Hitoshi snorted, "Coming from a Pikachu, I'll take that to heart."

Mina perked up, "We used to call him Psyduck but it just wasn't the same. Denkichu is much better."

Tired of being embarrassed, Kaminari grabbed Shinsou's hand and led him back past the ovens and then up the stairs. The blonde brought him back to the private kitchen, or the "scene of the crime" as he now thought of it.

Denki leaned against the kitchen counter and pointed to a seat, "Sit your butt down and talk to me properly this time. Be honest, okay?"

Hitoshi returned to the comfy chair he'd been on before and tried to figure out how he would word his confession. "I've been watching your stream for a while now. I came across it when I started teaching. Things felt more lonely than ever. Coming home to an empty house after being exhausted by children all day. I didn't have the energy to go out somewhere, I didn't even really want to, and I kept thinking how nice it would be if I had a friend who was okay with just hanging out at home. It seemed like magic when I came across an ad for Ch4rgeb0lt...I mean, uh, _you_."

"Yeah, you dork, I know who Ch4rgeb0lt is." Denki smiled, "I gotta admit. You're kind of the target audience for my stream, huh?"

Shinsou let out an amused breath, "Well, you're right about what you said when we were talking. You're good at making people feel special."

Kaminari gasped and pointed a finger at Shinsou, "Oh my gosh! I totally talked _about_ you while talking _to_ you during that private stream!" the blonde covered his face with his hands, "Oh man, that is sooo embarrassing..."

Hitoshi shrugged, "I thought it was cute."

"Of course you did. You're like the awkward sentence version of the tooth fairy."

Shinsou wrinkled his brows, "Excuse me?"

"Yeah, I say weird shit and you just roll with it and give me super nice comments instead of money under a pillow."

"Are...are we not going to address the fact that I _have_ given you money?"

Kaminari flopped onto Hitoshi's lap for an exasperated hug, "You are the worst best person ever." The blonde nuzzled his head against Shinsou's neck. "Keep talking?"

"I'm not complaining, but I am surprised at how calm you've been about all of this."

Denki hummed somberly, "I'm still like 45% pissed? I'm not very good at letting negative feelings show. On top of that, I've always felt bad about holding grudges and being angry. I just kinda push them down until I know how to pick 'em apart. Don't worry, I'll totally explode because of it one day- or at least I'll bring it up in an argument seven years from now."

Shinsou ruffled his hair, "So we're still together in seven years?"

"Huh," The blonde paused, "Well, apparently my subconscious is pretty confident about that, so I guess we are. Heads up, I snore."

"In that case," Hitoshi took a chance, "I'm going to assume that means we're dating." He took a quick breath, " _Please_ tell me if I just accidentally decided you're my boyfriend because I truly cannot handle being any more awkward around you than I already have been."

Kaminari's laugh was muffled by Shinsou's shoulder. "We're boyfriends. I'll embroider our initials on a pillow with a heart around them and everything- just to make it official."

"You can embroider?"

"Not even a little!" Kaminari added happily.

An armful of Denki was a truly wonderful thing, and Hitoshi was enjoying the hell out of it. "It's the little things like your jokes that really caught my affections. You always seem to know what to say."

"Yeah," Kaminari replied, "I'm kind of a big deal."

Shinsou poked him in the side and got a laugh for it, "Do you think it'll feel weird to do the stream, now?"

"I think it'll be fine. Ch4rgeb0lt isn't _all_ of me, you know? He's not really a character but he's still only aspects of myself. He has to be more accessible to everyone. Fluid to the situation and catering to everybody all the time. I don't think I could keep that up in real life. Either way, I have to be able to separate the two or I'd feel way too exposed. I get to hide behind him, and I think that's what makes it easy to tap into what people want or need."

The purple-haired man nodded and understood the concept better than he thought he would. It made sense that Denki would have to have a persona dedicated to other people to do what he does. If he was Ch4rgeb0lt all the time he'd never stick up for himself or make stupid sexual innuendos every other minute. "It's certainly a working method. You've thoroughly charmed all your 'friends and lovers' that way." Shinsou paused, "Which is fine, but sometimes I want to yell at MeatMeOutBack29 to shut up and that I've kissed you but he never will."

Kaminari's laugh was quiet, but the rush of air against his neck told him how much the blonde enjoyed the sentiment. "You're adorable."

"No one has ever accused me of that before."

"Well, they have now!" Denki let out a big yawn, "I think I have to take a nap before the stream tonight. Don't you have school tomorrow?"

Hitoshi peeked at his watch to find that time really had flown, because he had curriculums to plan and a full night's sleep to (hopefully) get. There was only one problem.

"I seem to have a kitten on my lap. Guess I'll just have to stay here forever."

Kaminari made sure to be as theatrical as possible while pulling himself off the other man, "Fiiiine," the blonde watched Shinsou stand up and noted just how flat the man's affect was. "For someone that's easy to read, you sure don't move your face much."

Hitoshi shrugged, "Emotional expression isn't really my forte."

Kaminari stuck out his tongue, "Gee, I hadn't noticed."

If Shinsou was a more immature person he would have stuck his tongue out right back but decided he'd much prefer to kiss the other man instead. He leaned in for a sweet press of their lips and felt Denki smile against him. The blonde wrapped his arms around Hitoshi's neck and deepened the kiss. Shinsou's head was spinning with happiness, and he was afraid he'd fall right over. He pulled back, giving Kaminari a small follow-up kiss on his nose, and let his boyfriend release his arms from around him.

Denki hummed, "We should do that more often. I hear boyfriends do this kinda thing."

"I think that's the smartest thing you've ever said."

When Shinsou got home he had a big decision to make.

Could he handle watching Ch4rgeb0lt's stream now that he was dating him? Would it change things between them?

Truthfully, Hitoshi didn't think he could stop himself from doing it anyway. He tried to put it off by preparing schoolwork for the next day but found himself constantly checking the time. Thirty minutes of the stream left...twenty minutes of the stream left…

Okay, fuck it. He'll watch.

He was a bit giddy as he grabbed his computer. The message that stated he had logged in appeared in the chat and he couldn't stop his grin when he saw Ch4rgeb0lt's eyes go wide. He looked like he was on the edge of bursting into laughter.

"Hito- I mean hi! Yep, hi. Hello, MindWash! Fancy seeing you here."

Good to know Kaminari was just as awkward as he was when surprised, _"Oh, you know me. I hate to miss a stream. How else would I spend an hour in the evening usually dedicated to being social?"_

Denki gave a sly smirk, "Not spending it with a certain special someone?"

 _"Actually, I think I already am."_

Ch4rgeb0lt faked a dramatic swoon, the back of his hand elegantly lifted to his forehead, "You are truly the smoothest of gentlemen!"

MeatMeOutBack29 typed, _"Do you so easily forget about the rest of your steadfast fanbase?"_

Kaminari frowned, "Hmmm, 'Fanbase' is such a dirty word. Y'all are friends and lovers, remember? I could never forget a single one of you...Except for you, Meat. Is this your first time on the stream? Welcome!"

Before MeatMeOutBack29 could respond with inevitable outrage, Ch4geb0lt dissolved into cackles. "Sorry, I couldn't help myself! Don't you worry, Sweet Meat. I'd never forget you!" and then followed it up with a big "mwah!" sound.

It was so easy to get annoyed at the admin whenever he got Denki's affection. Shinsou had to remind himself that earlier that day Meat wasn't embracing Ch4rgeb0lt but Hitoshi certainly was. More than once.

So there.

A post went up on the chat alerting everyone that Z4p_U_L8r, a signature-line inspired nickname to be sure, had donated $20 with a note that read, _"tell me you'll never forget me too! i wanna get sum of that love!"_

Kaminari smiled warmly before saying, with impressive sincerity, "I will never forget you, Zap. I hereby promise," and then made a heart shape with sparking fingers. "You deserve all of the love!"

Shinsou couldn't help but spend more time watching than participating. For the first time in his life he was seeing his _boyfriend_ ( _holy shit_ ) in a whole new light. He admired him even more, knowing that Denki was happily in a relationship but still able to make people feel special and loved. He was also surprisingly less jealous than he thought he'd be. Maybe it was because in an hour from now he could ask if Kaminari was still up and even swing by the cafe for a kiss and some hugs considering how close to his apartment it was. Though he'll be honest, his proverbial fur still bristles a bit when that loving attitude is directed towards Meat.

 _Fuck that guy._

Then the chat informed the viewers that **_Insan1ty2 has joined the stream_ **_._

Denki sighed, "You know, I really should have seen that coming."

MeatMeOutBack29 responded instantly, _"Insan1ty, you were officially banned from this channel. That ban included your IP address so it is particularly upsetting that you went out of your way to get a new one. We must ask that you respect this decision and cease any further contact with Ch4rgeb0lt. I will not hesitate to involve the authorities."_

Insan1ty replied, _"im going to be good this time! ill stay away from the cafe. I don't want my love to scare you :)"_

Before Denki could even answer Shinsou jumped in, _"We all love Ch4rgeb0lt. He's very sweet, funny, and kind- among many other wonderful things, and that is all the more reason that none of us are going to let you frighten him. If you love him like you say you do then you will stop coming to the stream."_

Kaminari looked conflicted. It was obviously hard for him to say anything mean to a viewer, but anyone could see he looked incredibly uncomfortable. "I'm thankful that I've given you some happiness, but you're freaking me out, dude. I know a couple other guys who do similar streams that are super awesome, and nowhere near your location. Maybe it's time to give you their info…"

Insan1ty2 responded almost immediately, _"but they aren't you! :( "_

MeatMeOutBack29 contributed the most useful thing, in Shinsou's opinion, that he ever has, _"Insan1ty2, I have recorded your old and new IP addresses and sent a copy of it to the police under a report of stalking behavior and harassment. I have been notified the complaint has been received and that the local force will be following up on this claim. You know Ch4rgeb0lt is too kind to stop giving you chances, but as an administrator and objective party I have no qualms with taking matters into my own hands."_

The tension was so thick that, outside of Shinsou and Meat, nobody was posting anything in the chat.

Kaminari leaned forward to type something, and a list of links to other streamers was posted. "Check these out instead, okay? I know they are far away from you, but probably not as chill as I am about this stuff, so treat them well!"

 ** _Insan1ty2 has been banned from the stream._**

The chat remained silent and, like an angel, Ch4rgeb0lt did the thing he does best at moments like these: He made a horrible fucking joke.

"Do you think if aliens do something too human-like that they say No Homo-sapien?"

It only took a few seconds for the chat to fill up with various _"lol"_ _"booooo!"_ or _"OMG!"_ posts, and Shinsou let out a breath he didn't know he had been holding. Everyone was most likely grateful that their host knew how to guide them back to feeling settled.

The blonde brought the conversation to lighter topics, and later tried to solve a Rubix cube that a viewer had given him money to buy. He failed miserably but it was funny all the while. He managed to keep up conversation throughout it, and Hitoshi realized his quirk might actually be just be being a total sunshine child.

When it came time for the stream to end, many of the viewers typed different versions of _"please be safe!"_ and the like. Kaminari thanked them all warmly before signing off with his signature kiss. "Zap you later, babe!"

Shinsou closed his laptop and decided he'd text Denki to check on him.

 **You:** Are you alright?

It didn't take long for the blonde to answer, and Hitoshi wondered whether or not he expected him to reach out. He hoped the man knew that he'd always be there when he needed him.

 **Denki:** a little freaked but cool

 **Denki:** meat was a total bamf, lol. u were good 2 i guess

 **You:** Planning on dating him instead?

 **Denki:** 4 the low price of $10 i alredy am

 **Denki:** what a steal!

 **Denki:** (kidding)

 **You:** I hope so. As long as you understand I'm the total package.

 **Denki:** (*¯ ³¯*)

 **Denki:** u also left urself open for 8 million dick jokes with that js

 **You:** If I was better with Kaomoji I'd send an offended looking one to you.

 **Denki:** i got u bro

 **Denki:** use this

 **Denki:** (＃`Д´)

 **You:** Thank you.

 **You:** (＃`Д´).

 **Denki:** im so proud!

 **Denki:** o(ω)o

 **You:** Let's not get too ambitious. One soul-sucking online fad at a time, please.

 **Denki:** that a chalenge?

 **Denki:** ( ╯°□°)╯ ┻━━┻

 **Denki:** sry lemme put that table bck

 **Denki:** ┬─┬ノ( º _ ºノ)

 **Denki:** in this house we respect furnture

 **You:** In the words of kids these days: "I can't even."

 **Denki:** yeh it is kinda weird when u do it

 **Denki:** go back to being the respnsible 1

 **You:** How about you go to bed.

 **You:** Are you feeling any better now?

 **Denki:** o shit i totally am

 **Denki:** ur the best

 **You:** Maybe I should be the one with the stream instead.

 **Denki:** im gonna channel my inner bakubro

 **Denki:** go fuk urself 3

Thanks to his ridiculous blonde boyfriend, Shinsou's chest felt beautifully full for the first time in a while.

 **You:** Sweet dreams to you too.


	15. Chapter 15

After the school day had ended, Shinsou was a man on a mission. That mission was to find out what was happening with the case against this Insan1ty person, and to check on Kaminari. Something which was absolutely not just an excuse to see his boyfriend.

Okay, maybe a little bit.

He figured that he had a couple of options: follow up with the official complaint that MeatMeOutBack29 had made, discuss the situation with his dad, stake out the cafe himself, or go to the Bakusquad and make this hunt a group effort. If possible, he'd like to avoid talking to his father about this until he'd made some progress himself. He could already imagine the "why are you running to me when you should be doing your own work?" conversation that would follow his request for help. He also didn't have any idea which kind of legal assistance Meat reached out to. He'd said the police, but what are the odds that he's in close enough range for them to follow up in the correct neighborhood? Meat wouldn't know where to send them for a location, would he? The man has admin rights but Shinsou didn't think he had further personal connections with Denki. He felt confident about this because if he did that would have been immediately thrown in his face during their showdown. So it seemed the only two options left were to stake things out himself or try and involve the terrifying but likely useful friend group that Kaminari has.

At this time of day it was likely that Kirishima and Bakugou weren't yet crashing there due to their usual late morning to afternoon shifts, and before their evening to early morning ones. Hitoshi found teaching tiring enough, and has no idea how his father managed to balance that with consistent and active hero work. It's no wonder the man was always exhausted.

After weighing both options he decided that he would do a small stake-out and then stop by the cafe. He took the long way to Amped Up from his school, and strolled slowly while keeping an eye out for any suspicious activity. Whoever it was would have to be within sight of the storefront since they said they just watched him in the cafe all day, and it must be someone who is standing still or only moving in very short laps. Hitoshi would use his height to his advantage and focus on where people's heads were turned, something much easier to do when you're above them.

He lazily circled the surrounding blocks and spiraled his way closer to Amped Up each time. He had fully walked the perimeter and saw no suspicious activity, which helped calm his heart. Hopefully the police were, at the very least, working on the case.

In four of his long strides, he was at the door and heard the very familiar ring of the bell as he entered.

For the first time since coming here, Shinsou saw a woman with sharply cut purple hair fiddling behind the counter. She had the air of someone who was really fucking done with their day, and it looked like Denki wasn't helping any. The blonde was talking her ear off and clearly ignoring the coffee machine in front of him, which was only a concern since today there were a fair number of customers.

Hitoshi decided to hang back a bit and watch his boyfriend in his natural habitat. The only time he'd seen him actually working was when Shinsou was desperately trying not to stare at him. The woman beside Denki grabbed his shoulders and steered him to the cash register where he started to take orders like he'd been there the whole time. Tables were full up and the only spaces left were a series of tall seats by a short bar that wrapped around the inside of the window.

The door behind him jingled and two familiar faces walked by carrying many bags. Mina and Sero greeted him with a nod and a happy cry. "Hey, buddy!"

Shinsou gestured to their packages, "Need a hand?"

Both Bakusquad members immediately gave Hitoshi all of the bags they had been holding, Sero clapped him on the back, "Thanks bro! Consider that another Baku-point."

The purple-haired man struggled with juggling the six plastic bags they'd handed over, and followed the two past the line and towards the kitchen.

Denki handed a blue-haired teenager her coffee before crying out, "Babe!" to get his attention.

Shinsou grunted while trying to lift all the items onto the counter, "I would wave but I'm apparently delivering groceries."

The woman with angular hair walked over to help him, "You must be Yes Cat. Thanks for the Instagram followers."

 _There it is. My legacy._

"Shinsou Hitoshi. Nice to meet you."

"Jirou Kyouka, and thanks for taking Denki off my hands these last couple of days. When he's lovesick he leaves me alone."

"I can hear you, you know!" Kaminari called out while making a cappuccino.

Jirou responded with an exasperated, "That's why I said it." She turned back to Hitoshi and pointed to the bags he'd helped bring in. "Want to be useful and help us put things away? I'm not going to pay you but afterward, you have my permission to just chill upstairs."

It's not like Shinsou had anything much else to do, so he nodded and assisted her in hauling the bags into the kitchen. It only took a short while to restock and put everything in its place since Mina came into the back to help. Three pairs of hands got the job done fast.

By the time they were finished the cafe had gotten a bit quieter. People were still drinking and eating but the line was nonexistent. Denki and Sero were sharing a brownie that they tried to hide when Jirou walked back out. The purple-haired girl just shook her head and let them continue. The two men shared a subtle high-five once she turned around, that Hitoshi was positive she could hear the slap of.

"Okay dorks, I'm headed upstairs for the rest of the night. Lock up, Denki." Kyouka walked to the kitchen, and Mina immediately turned the radio to play pop music instead of the classic rock that Jirou must have chosen.

Kaminari pulled on Shinsou's sleeve, "That means we can close a bit early tonight if you wanna hang out?"

Hitoshi pulled Denki in for a hug, "I'd like that." He leaned in for a quick kiss- he knew better than to do anything more while there were still customers around. Kaminari was all smiles in response and squeezed the taller man tight before stepping back.

"I did some surveillance today," Shinsou started, "I thought it'd be a good idea to see if I could spot any suspicious people or activity."

"Any luck?"

Hitoshi shook his head, "Not yet, but don't worry. We'll catch the guy. Maybe Meat scared him off."

Kaminari sighed, "Man, I hope so. Every time we have a line I keep thinking 'what if it's someone who is here right now?' and I start to freak out a bit."

It angered Shinsou that his boyfriend had to spend any time worrying, especially when it's something he felt like he should be able to fix. Being someone's partner meant caring for them and that includes protecting. He wouldn't let a single thing happen to Denki.

The heavy front door opened and Red Riot walked in, bell ringing behind him, and excitedly announced, "Your favorite person has arrived!"

Denki arched a brow, "What do you mean? Shinsou's been here for, like, half an hour already."

Sero snickered, "Cold, dude."

The only way to describe Kaminari's responding laugh was a cackle.

Bakugou followed soon after. He spotted Shinsou and expressed his displeasure with a "The fuck is this?"

Kirishima must have had the same thought, "Not that we aren't totally stoked to see you, but what are you doing here again on a weekday? I thought you had a job."

Kaminari fidgeted and answered for him, "It's partially 'cause the creepy guy came back last night."

Mina sighed, "...I'll get the shovel. Hanta, you grab the rope."

Sero scoffed and waved his arms, "Rope? Dude, did you forget my quirk? Fuck your rope."

"Why get shitty rope or tape when I can blast that asswad's body into ashes?"

Shinsou raised his eyebrows, "I didn't realize until now just how perfectly compatible your squad members are for getting away with murder."

Mina's smile was the perfect picture of innocence, "I know, right? It's so cute!"

Hitoshi firmly believed that they had different definitions of cute, but he'd hate to rain on her murder parade.

Denki must have felt similarly to Mina because he wiped a single tear from his eye and said, "Aww, man. You guys are too sweet. What did I do to get friends like you?"

Bakugou grunted from behind a stolen croissant, "Who the fuck said we were friends?"

They all silently agreed to let the ash blonde continue to bluster without pointing out the extreme evidence to the contrary. Because that's what good friends do.

Eijirou turned to Shinsou, "If you think about it you're kind of an honorary Bakusquad member, right? Denki told us about your quirk- it would go great with ours! When Katsuki and I start our own agency you've got a place with us. All our bros do."

"Thank you?" Technically, his father had thoroughly taught him how to be a hero, whenever he wasn't teaching his own class, so it wasn't an impossibility. The odds were good that he'd pass the licensing exam, but he'd prefer to work underground. Helping his dad during interrogations was pretty satisfying on its own. More than any of that, he was just flattered that Red Riot called him his "bro."

"Shitty hair, you can't just go inviting any random asshole into our agency! I make the fucking calls here, and I didn't say crap about any of these pricks."

Eijirou pouted, "It's not random. They're our best buddies!" and his inevitable puppy dog eyes were powerful enough that Bakugou had to look away with a clearly forced scowl.

For someone supposedly in charge, Katsuki was really great at folding to Kirishima's desires. Which brought Shinsou to the question, "Why is it called the Bakusquad?"

Mina answered with a tone that implied she's done this many times before, "The Bakugroup or Teamkugou didn't sound as catchy."

"No, I meant why is it Bakugou's squad and not anyone else's?"

Kaminari smirked at him, "Do you honestly think Katsuki would be part of anything that wasn't lead by him?"

He certainly couldn't argue with the facts, "Fair point."

"Damn right," the ash blonde growled from the corner, "And who the fuck said you could use my first name, Drooly?"

Sero ran damage control- which is to say he brought up a different thing that Bakugou could get angry at that wasn't focused on Denki, "Did you know Bakubro and Kirishima have matching bracelets? I'm guessing Kirishima wasn't the one to pick them out because they're pretty snazzy. I mean he wears crocs , and that's a fashion failure all on its own, so it couldn't have been his choice."

"Ooh! Do you think it's like a wedding ring?" Mina asked, "That would be adorable! Who do you think would propose to who? I feel like Katsuki is way too tsundere to do it."

Kaminari shook his head, "Nah. That's exactly why he would. He saves up all this time being the one who 'doesn't care' and then finally has to prove himself in a grand romantic gesture that he looks unhappy about but secretly loves."

An explosion completely burnt the table Katsuki was now standing next to. The smell of fire filled the air and a particularly deep scorch mark painted half of the chair beside it.

Kirishima winced, "Uh...I'll pay for that."

Sero sighed, "See, Bakubro? He's already being a good husband. Jump on that before anyone else does."

The sound of loud running was heard coming from the kitchen, and then Jirou was standing behind the counter looking at curls of smoke coming off of the cafe's furniture.

"Damnit, not again! You always do this!" She turned to glare at Kaminari, "Can't you wait till he's outside to antagonize him?"

Denki threw up his hands, "It wasn't even me this time!"

Sero whistled innocently, which made Jirou immediately realize it was his fault. Her earlobe jacks stretched across the room before tightening themselves around the black-haired man's neck. She spoke in an unnervingly sweet manner, "Any idea what happened here, Hanta?" He tried to answer but mostly made a wheezing sound and then a lopsided grin. It brought back memories of when Hitoshi was in that headlock, courtesy of the Bakusquad, and just seeing her strangle him in a similar fashion made Shinsou like this girl immensely. No wonder Denki enjoyed her so much. He had a feeling she had a good head on her shoulders.

Kyouka released him from her cords but continued to give him the stink eye. "So who in this room is paying for a new and very expensive chair?"

Kirishima started to volunteer but Jirou shook her head, "I'm talking to Bakugou and he knows it. You shouldn't always have to clean up his messes."

The ash blonde growled but agreed, "Whatever, jackoff. Just pick something out that's nicer than the crap you've got now. You've got shit taste."

Mina sighed, "We can't all have fashion industry parents, Bakugou."

Shinsou could fully imagine Katsuki coming from a snooty brand-name kind of lifestyle. His anger issues just added another flavor to it.

Jirou extended her hand palm up and held it out in front of Bakugou. After a moment of grumbling, the hero grabbed his wallet and pulled out an impressive number of bills that he angrily shoved into her hand.

"There. You happy now, dickmunch?"

Kyouka arched one eyebrow and Katsuki groaned. "Fine, you happy now you lesbian Hitler?"

She shrugged, "Closer. Now everybody stop burning the place down. I'm going back upstairs and if I hear one more explosion you're all banned."

Sero frowned, "But we work here!"

Jirou singsonged, "Not for long at this rate!" and left.

Mina and Sero turned to look at each other with concern. The pink girl called out, "You're on your own, Denks! We're getting out of here. You close, yeah? It's not like you have far to walk home!" She and Sero packed their things efficiently before Kaminari could even complain.

"Take an early day! Wrap things up," Sero turned to any remaining customers and cried, "Last call!"

Bakugou started to leave as well, "You're not a fucking bar, halfwit. You don't have any stupid last calls."

Mina shrugged in response, and Kirishima didn't argue. The four other members of the Bakusquad left, along with any remaining customers, and Shinsou and Denki were alone.

"So, uh…" Kaminari started, rocking back and forth on his feet, "you come here often?"

Hitoshi brushed a lock of Denki's hair behind his ear, "Lately, yeah."

The two lovers were leaning in for a kiss when the front door slammed open and in walked a purple-haired man in a long shiny black coat, who strode up to the cash register with gusto.

"I've finally found you! Desist at once, villain! I've got more than enough evidence to have you behind bars if your behavior doesn't change and-" the man stopped, his face the very picture of shock, "Could it possibly be...Ch4rgeb0lt?"

Kaminari looked like a deer caught in a particularly large truck's headlights, "I'm starting to think my stream is actually just a two block radius. How does this keep happening?!"

The man in the stiff black hero costume gently reached for Denki's hand and held it for much too long, in Shinsou's opinion, before smoothly replying, "It must be fate."

Kaminari didn't seem to know what to do so he vigorously shook the hand as though that was the intention and pulled it back quickly afterward, "Please tell me you're not the stalker guy?"

This angered the man greatly, "I would never! If anything I have been actively trying to halt his actions. If you wish me to leave right now I will. I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

Denki's jaw dropped, "That cop stuff...and your weird fancy way of speaking...Dude, are you _Meat_?!"

The man looked incredibly pleased with himself, "So you do recognize me! I must have left quite the impression. Allow me to properly introduce myself. I am Shishikura Seiji. It is a pleasure to make your proper acquaintance."

Kaminari smiled more happily at him than Hitoshi would have liked, "I'm Kaminari Denki," he then pointed to Shinsou, "and you kinda know this guy." The blonde shuffled his feet a bit, "Do you, like, want a coffee while you're here or something? This is super weird."

Shishikura shook his head, "That won't be necessary," and he turned to finally examine the third man in the room. It only took him a moment before his expression became sour, "You must be MindWash…"

Shinsou arched an uninterested eyebrow, "How could you tell?"

"Given the circumstances, it seemed likely. Even more importantly, I just have this innate dislike for you."

"The feeling is mutual. I'm not even vaguely threatened, though. Since I met Denki first. Oh, you probably didn't know his real name before today, did you?" Shinsou deadpanned, "Try not to feel too embarrassed."

Seiji opened his formerly pursed lips, "I doubt you know him better than I do. If it comes down to it I've spent markedly more money and time with him, both in his overall streaming career and through private dates."

"I'm still not hearing any of that involving you meeting him in, you know, real life?"

Shishikura looked the taller boy up and down, "An odd gangly hill giant like yourself is hardly any competition."

"That so? Has anyone ever told you that you have unsettlingly beady eyes?"

"As if your astoundingly dark circles are any better! Besides, I'll have you know my large and beautiful eyes are my best feature."

"It's a low bar."

Kaminari spoke with incredibly nervous laughter, "Girls, girls! You're both pretty!"

Shishikura turned to Hitoshi with a sneer, "See? Denki thinks my eyes are pretty."

"That joke went over your head, huh?" Shinsou smirked, "Considering I'm much taller than you I'm not surprised."

"It's an extra three inches at best, and it hardly matters!"

Shinsou's smile grew twice as big, "I bet Denki thinks those extra three inches matter quite a-"

"WE'RE NOT DOING THIS!" Kaminari yelled before quietly whining to himself, "Oh my gosh, what is going on with all the crazy purple-haired people in my life..."

Hitoshi played the good boyfriend card and put a comforting arm around Denki's shoulders. Something he likes to think he would have done even if he wasn't trying to subtly remind Seiji to back the fuck off.

Shishikura cleared his throat and ignored Shinsou entirely, "I have not stopped doing my best to protect you and chase after Insan1ty. I believe I will find him in due time, and justice will be appropriately served.

Denki seemed confused, "So, the person you made the 'formal complaint and charge' to is actually just yourself?"

"It sounds incredibly less gallant when you put it that way, but yes. I have had some success with my hunt, as well. The reason I'm even here is because the IP addresses led me to this exact location. Our culprit must have been using the streaming site while being either in or near the cafe. That may seem alarming, but I promise no harm will come to you. How lucky it is that such an able man like me is on the job."

Seiji looked quite pleased with himself. Which meant Shinsou had to ruin that as soon as possible, "Shouldn't you have brought it to the actualauthorities?"

Shishikura huffed angrily, "I think you've forgotten you are speaking to a fully licensed and successful hero."

"Oh? Which number are you in the rankings? I must have heard of someone so successful," Shinsou drawled.

"That's irrelevant to the situation!"

"Irrelevant? I'm not familiar with that number."

Seiji laughed sharply, "I'm surprised you can even count."

"All right!" Denki cried, "Quit the dick measuring contest- Hitoshi don't say a word! I can practically hear that look in your eye."

Shinsou stifled a smile.

 _Guilty as charged._

The blonde stepped away from the taller man's arm and stood with his hands on his hips, "I'm my own person , in case you both forgot! Can you stop acting like cavemen and take this seriously?"

Hitoshi was impressed with himself for not responding "no" despite the overwhelming urge to. Kaminari had a point, though. They were definitely disregarding his feelings. "You're right. I'm sorry, Denki."

His boyfriend smiled back at him, and that look was worth not getting in another jab at the so-called hero. Mostly.

"I apologize as well," Seiji lowered his hands and clasped them behind his back. An oddly military position, which was extra strange since he certainly didn't look like he'd ever been in the army. Shinsou might even go as far as to say he appeared scrawny.

"So, we're working our way towards finding him. Good!" Denki paused, "Hey, Meat. What kind of hero are you anyway?"

Shishikura looked as though he wasn't sure if the nickname was an endearment or a reflex, "It's a transformation quirk. I use my own flesh as projectiles and can turn others into what are essentially human meatballs."

Shinsou pretended to cough in order to hide his laugh. Meatballs? What kind of quirk was that?

 _I could run him into the ground with just an answer to a question. Let's see this Meat guy do that._

Denki nodded, unperturbed, "I get it. So your username is a callout to that?"

"Yes. The number afterward is simply my birthday."

Hitoshi snorted, "You put your birthday in your username? What are you, a thirteen-year-old girl?"

Okay, maybe the bitch fight wasn't entirely out of his system.

Seiji ignored the comment and continued to speak, "Kaminari, I very much enjoyed our private conversations. Will those have to stop now that we've met each other?"

Kaminari poked Shinsou in the arm as he answered, "This guy still comes to the stream, and if he can then you definitely still should. I'd miss you if you left!"

The hero looked incredibly smug and made sure to have pointed eye contact with Hitoshi as he responded, "Of course you would. There's no one quite like me."

"That's one way of putting it," Shinsou said under his breath.

Shishikura shot him a dirty look, "Can I speak for a-"

"I don't know, _can_ you?"

Kaminari, embarrassed, pushed Shinsou- not that it moved the much stronger and taller man, scolding him, "Hitoshi! Sorry, Meat."

Seiji looked at Denki with what could only be described as a passionate stare, "Don't worry. I've already forgotten all about him." The meatball hero grabbed one of the business cards for the cafe that sat by the till and a pen. He elegantly wrote something down and handed it to Kaminari. "My number. May I have yours? So I can keep you informed about the investigation, of course."

 _Yeah fucking right._

Hitoshi snatched the pen from the other man's hand and wrote his own phone number before handing it back. "Denki will probably be with me. You can communicate with him that way. It'd be unprofessional for a viewer to be so informed, wouldn't it?"

Seiji scoffed, "As if you have any place to talk. You're involved far more than I am."

Then, Shinsou got to do what he'd been waiting for this entire conversation.

"I don't know if I'd call it getting in his way," Hitoshi slipped an arm tightly around Kaminari's waist and dove in to deeply kiss the surprised blonde on the lips. Then he looked up to widely grin at the outraged man across from him and added, "After all, I'm _dating him_ , aren't I?"


	16. Chapter 16

" _Dating_?" Shishikura looked as though he couldn't believe his eyes. He recovered and responded in his usual haughty tone, "That's hardly professional!" He turned to look at Denki, "Is this true?"

Kaminari was still in shock from the sudden kiss and sassiness. Shinsou would like to believe it was because the blonde was impressed with his smoothness but then Denki grabbed him by the shoulder and electrocuted him.

"Fuck!"

Denki pulled his hand away, his expression fuming. "I can't believe you did that! Bad Hitoshi! No Cat!"

Shinsou would admit it was pretty inappropriate to maul his boyfriend just to piss off another man, but if it meant shoving their relationship in Shishikura's face he'd do it again whether or not he got zapped for it. However, he was positive that Kaminari wouldn't accept "sorry not sorry" as a reply.

He went to calm down the hair that he guessed had raised from the static, but then realized it looked no different than before. Clearly, their love was meant to be.

Kaminari continued his reprimanding, turning to Seiji this time, "And you! You could have done the grown-up thing and let it go but you just had to make it a catfight? I'm not even angry at you, I'm disappointed."

And everyone knows that's way worse than anger.

Shishikura looked dismayed, "I am sorry, Ch4rgeb0lt. It was childish of me. I'll refrain from antagonizing him further," he paused and glared at Hitoshi, "unlike some people I know when to apologize."

Denki raised an annoyed eyebrow.

"I'm doing it again, aren't I?" The meat hero mumbled.

Kaminari threw up his hands in exasperation, "I give up. All the purple-haired people in my life are insane," He paused, "Actually, Jirou's pretty cool. So that means it's just you two."

Shinsou wanted to say, "He started it," but he didn't think he could handle another shock.

Once the men in question were thoroughly scolded, Denki laid out the plan. "Okay, I have to do the stream tonight so both of you need to skedaddle," Shishikura was about to speak when the blonde continued, "Yes, you can watch it... at home. If we need to powwow about this again I'll contact you."

"Through my phone," Shinsou added.

Denki rolled his eyes, "That means you have to get outta here too, babe."

Seiji flinched a bit at the word 'babe' and Hitoshi found that incredibly satisfying. It was way better when Kaminari was the reason the other man was upset.

Shinsou asked, "Will you be alright alone?"

"I zapped the hell out of you, didn't I? Nobody is gonna mess with this guy," Denki boasted and gestured to himself with two thumbs.

He had a point.

Shishikura composed himself enough to say, "If it wouldn't be an imposition I'd appreciate if you could put me up for the night. I would not normally ask but I did come something of a distance to investigate my lead."

"No," Hitoshi answered for them both.

Kaminari nodded, "It'd be pretty weird. I don't have a couch either and you definitely aren't sleeping in my bed." Then the blonde got a delighted look on his face, "But you know who does have a couch?"

Shinsou blanched, "No way. Absolutely not."

Denki did his best impression of kitten eyes but even that couldn't sway him. Unfortunately, Kaminari knew how to get him to say yes. "Well, if you can't take them then I guess Seiji will just have to sleep with m- I mean next to me."

 _That little shit. He knows exactly what he's doing._

Shinsou glared at the other purple-haired man and growled, "You're sleeping on the floor."

Seiji shook his head, "I'd much prefer Ch4rgeb0lt's offer. Enjoy your cold and empty bed, MindWash."

Before Hitoshi could punch him in his smug face, Denki poked the shorter purple-haired man with a sparking finger, "You're _both_ going out and that's final. I still have a stream to run!"

Seiji and Shinsou glared at each other with the face of men who knew they had no other option than to tolerate the other's existence.

Kaminari gave a wink and a smile, "Play nice, you two!"

 _Sure. I'll play a nice fist into his face._

* * *

An incredibly silent walk back to Shinsou's apartment led the two men to where they are now: standing beside each other and trying not to start another fight.

"You get the floor. Be thankful."

Shishikura narrowed his already small eyes, "Considering I'm doing far more than you are to catch Ch4rgeb0lt's stalker I expect better treatment."

Hitoshi deadpanned, "Sure. You get the princess suite," and threw a blanket that had been on the couch down to the ground.

Seiji huffed but acquiesced. He seemed tired and after the day they'd all had Shinsou couldn't blame him. "I'll be in my room watching Denki. Don't disturb me."

"Am I supposed to miss it then?" Shishikura frowned, "I never miss a stream!"

Shinsou shrugged, "First time for everything."

"I demand that we share!"

Hitoshi kept his face schooled but he was appalled. "Share? You want me to share my laptop, and Kaminari's stream, with you?"

Seiji stood his ground, "I believe that's what sharing means, yes."

"Not a chance in hell."

"Then I'll just keep talking and ruin the night for you. Won't that be fun? I think I'll break some dishes in your obscenely small kitchen."

Shinsou sighed, "Fine, but we're using my log-in and you aren't allowed to type. If I consider anything you say to matter I still probably won't write it. That's my final offer."

Seiji put out his hand to shake, and Hitoshi didn't take it.

The taller man walked over to his desk and pulled out his laptop, before situating it between them on a table in front of the couch. He'd let Shishikura sit on the couch during the stream but he definitely wasn't sleeping on it. They grumbled at each other while organizing themselves, and Hitoshi pulled up the stream.

They were five minutes late.

Upon logging in, Ch4rgeb0lt lit up at the alert, "Hey there, MindWash! You keep coming late. Is someone keeping you busy?"

The chat filled with a variety of "oooohhhh"s.

Shinsou typed, "Yeah, I'm seeing this cute guy right now but I pissed him off," and then happily added, "It's a shame that MeatMeOutBack29 couldn't make it tonight. I thought he never missed a stream."

Shishikura brutally pinched Hitoshi's arm, "Stop that! You're going to make him think I'm not watching."

"I'm sure he can guess you wouldn't let me watch the stream without you."

They turned back to see the blonde on screen laugh, "I bet he's got a special somebody keeping him busy. How romantic!"

Seiji smirked at the disgusted look on Shinsou's face.

Hitoshi typed back, looking for vengeance, "I doubt it. Someone with his personality doesn't attract many people. I'm sure his face is nothing to look at either. He sounds like someone with beady eyes."

Shinsou was about to look at the man beside him to see his reaction when an alert came onto the chat announcing MeatMeOutBack29 has entered the stream. Hitoshi turned to his left and saw Seiji was on his phone, already typing a message furiously. "I apologize for my tardiness. I have an unfortunate problem that won't seem to leave."

Hitoshi immediately responded and he could feel his Aizawa grin slip into place, "Oh right, I forgot about your herpes. How is that going?"

The taller male felt an elbow jab into his side, and he returned it with one of his own.

"You must amuse yourself greatly, MindWash. Of course that means only one person enjoys your jokes."

Ch4rgeb0lt's eyes were focused on the chat, and his expression was pure exasperation. "Alright, alright. Let's settle down. We're all special and I love you both," he pressed his lips against the webcam and smiled when he pulled back.

Shinsou turned to Seiji, "I get to kiss him in real life."

"Yes, I couldn't help but notice."

"Just reminding you," Hitoshi grinned.

He turned back to look at his screen and heard Kaminari telling both of them to "at least pretend to get along!" Shinsou's response was to type, "Sorry, there's a really big rat that got into my house- I was trying to chase it out."

In retrospect, he was actually pretty glad that Seiji was here because otherwise he wouldn't get to hear the angry sputtering that his words caused.

Ch4rgeb0lt proceeded to roll his eyes, with what could almost be considered a look of fondness and moved on from addressing the two bickering men. They knew they would be ignored for the rest of the stream unless they pointedly responded to the blonde with no hint of malice or passive aggression in regards to the other. So the boys sharing the couch decided to just not acknowledge each other- this way they both got to watch, and receive attention from, the man they loved.

Whenever Ch4rgeb0lt laughed at something Shishikura said, it took Hitoshi a noticeable effort to not call the man a "pretentious little asshole" and out him on the chat for having a stupid quirk.

At the end of the day, Kaminari's affection was worth more than just satisfaction that spiteful actions bring. The two silently agreed on this and participated in the chat without further insult. This is not to say that occasionally they didn't 'accidentally' elbow or kick the person next to them while typing, but Denki didn't have to know.

Once the blonde had signed off, with his loving finger kiss and spark, Shishikura and Hitoshi faced each other again.

"In the spirit of being less of a dick than you are, I'll grab you a pillow and a proper blanket."

Seiji gave a polite nod and an awkward, "That's better of you than I expected," because saying 'thanks' just wasn't going to happen in this apartment tonight.

Shinsou handed him the neatly folded sheets and pillow and surrendered to the fact that Shishikura was definitely going to sleep on his couch the second he left the room. "Night."

Seiji frowned, "You aren't going to say good night?"

Hitoshi took a page from Bakugou's book to sassily reply, "Did I stutter?"

The shorter man actually smiled in response. Oddly enough, some camaraderie had been built between them. Perhaps their mutual affection for Ch4rgeb0lt gave them just enough in common. Or maybe they both enjoyed being a little shit and it was incredibly satisfying to have a chance to embrace that.

Shinsou made sure to turn off the living room light before Shishikura could properly arrange his sheets.

The morning brought one sleepy man, who was startled to find someone in his apartment before he remembered what had happened, and one man who had more energy than Shinsou appreciated.

* * *

Shinsou was wrapped in his blanket as he walked towards his kitchen to grab some coffee, "Why are you so chipper? I have given you no reason to enjoy being here and it is 6 AM."

Seiji stood in his oddly military stance and answered, "A hero is always working. I should be at my best at all times, to protect citizens like you and Ch4rgeb0lt."

Hitoshi gave a derisive snort, but was too damn tired to serve back any attitude. He'd perk up after his caffeine. Knowing that coffee was such a necessity, Shinsou owned a machine that was able to start brewing at a specific time so he never had to put in the work. Waking up and slipping into a hot cup was his ritual.

Shishikura carefully folded the sheets and pillow, and left them neatly on one side of the couch, "I shall leave shortly."

"How do you take your coffee?" Shinsou grunted.

The shorter man looked surprised that he was being asked, but answered "Just black, thank you."

Shinsou made a show of opening his fridge and pouring a generous amount of milk and two sugars into the mug he was making for Shishikura. He walked over to hand the cup (which had 'World's Okayest Teacher' written on it) over to the frowning man, "Enjoy."

"I won't."

Hitoshi smiled, "What a shame." He turned around to make his own coffee, feeling pleased with himself.

The conversation was terse at best, but not as venomous as it had been when they first met. Without Kaminari in front of them there was no need to posture, so all that was left was casual cat fighting.

Despite it not being to his liking, Shishikura finished the cup and prepared his things. "I'll be leaving your hovel now, MindWash. I would thank you for your hospitality, but seeing as there was none I'm sure you'll understand my silence."

Shinsou assisted him in finding the front door, "Meat, I have been hoping for your silence since you got here."

The two shared a minuscule smile, that both would vehemently deny, and Hitoshi shut the door with more force than necessary. It was good to have his home back. He'd probably have to deal with Seiji again since he was involved in the stalking case, but Shinsou would treasure his absence while he had it.

There was still plenty of time for him to pull things together and get to school. Today included a visit from a pro-hero and the kids have been excited about it all week. Whoever is invited will give the usual talk about good behavior, safety, and using your quirk in a careful manner. It takes everything in his power for Shinsou not to mention his dad is _the_ Eraserhead, when his students swooned over how cool the pros were.

He grabs the used sheets to place in his laundry hamper and childishly considered throwing out the pillow, before trudging back to his room to get properly dressed. Today felt like an elbow-patch sweater kind of day.

* * *

His students had been ecstatic listening to the stories of heroism that Dragoon Hero Ryukyu told during her presentation. Being Aizawa's son had given him many good connections, and he prided himself on being the teacher to bring the most famous hero every year. Ryukyu was currently the number fourteen, though she had spent some time as the number nine back when Hitoshi was in high school. Her quirk was unfortunately not possible to show off in class- a giant pink dragon was difficult to contain in a school building. Luckily, she was famous enough that his students already had seen videos of her power. The kids lined up for autographs and asked a million questions, which she patiently answered.

Shinsou had thanked her gratefully for coming to his class and made his students chorus a "thank you, Ryukyu!" when she was leaving. There was no holding their attention after such an exciting event, so Shinsou let the kids have some free time to play and read before school would shortly end. It was during this that Kaminari Pika stomped over to him with a pout on her face. Such an expression really helped show Hitoshi the resemblance in the family, and he was embarrassed that he hadn't guessed her uncle before parent-teacher conferences.

The little girl shook a finger in his face when he bent down to speak with her, "Cat Sensei! Are you why Den-Den isn't around as much?"

He couldn't tell her that Denki was currently being stalked, and spending most of his free time beside Hitoshi, without feeling guilty. "I think Denki has been busy with work. I know he misses you, though. He told me when I last saw him."

Pika lit up at the words, "He misses me?" then changed back into a frown, "but that means you are with him! Tell him to come visit me!" She batted a fist against his arm, and he made a show of her being strong to appease her mood.

"You've got a great arm, Pika. I'll bet you'll beat your uncle's muscles one day."

Not that it was a high bar.

She looked proud of herself, and Shinsou saw that he had successfully led her off the scent of discussing his relationship with Denki.

"Sensei, you think I could be a hero someday?"

Hitoshi nodded, "Not only do you have a strong quirk, but you have a good heart. That's what matters the most," and he poked her chest for good measure. She giggled happily and then grabbed Shinsou's hand to lead him away with her. He stumbled to stay bent enough to talk with her while also moving at a fast pace. She led him to her cubby and took out her backpack. Pika fished through it, looking for something deep inside, and then pulled her hand out with a flourish. In her small palm was a pink plastic ring with an unidentifiable Disney princess sticker on it. "Tell Den-Den I won."

With some confusion, Hitoshi accepted the gift and the girl skipped away to play with her friends. It then occurred to him that he may have accidentally gotten fourth-grade-level engaged with his boyfriend's niece.

He was totally wearing this later, because he knew Kaminari would ask what it was and he wouldn't miss seeing that reaction for the world.

The school bell loudly rang, and Shinsou wondered if Denki would be picking Pika up today. The blonde's schedule was so erratic that it was always a guess. One of the perks, and problems, of practically co-owning the place you work at. Kaminari had told him that Jirou had officially stated he could co-own it if he wanted, but the blonde assured her that she'd do a better job and that he'd rather cheer her on and help out while pursuing his other dreams.

For dismissal, the students were dressed in their coats and handed their bags before being led outside for their parents to pick them up. A gaggle of guardians were usually waiting for them by the time they exited the building, and today was no different. Usually, Hitoshi would only stay as long as his students were present, and quickly return to his classroom after the last child had been picked up, but today he seemed to be dragging his feet. It was probably just him being tired from the whirlwind his life had been recently, and that would have been fine if it hadn't meant one of the parents approached him with sultry intent.

Sidling up to him, daughter in hand, was Akari Kaminari. The curvaceous and carnivorous older sister to Denki, and an all around blonde powerhouse of a woman.

When she reached him she smirked, "I heard from Pika that you're dating my brother and are newly engaged to my daughter."

"If it's any consolation the second one was unintentional," Hitoshi deadpanned.

The woman threw her head back for a laugh, and then put a suggestive hand on Shinsou's arm, "Want a third Kaminari to play with?"

Hitoshi took a nervous step back, "One is more than enough, thank you."

He knew he looked uncomfortable, and Akari could probably tell, but she pursued him with a look of glee. "Are you sure? Plenty of room in my house for an extra body." He was pretty confident she was just doing this to watch him squirm, but she was somewhat notorious for trying to charm nearly anyone who came into her path. He was also aware that "extra body" could be a pick-up line as much as it could be a threat.

"Do you have any questions about Pika's education, Miss Kaminari?"

She pouted and ran her fingers through her hair, "You're no fun at all. I don't know why Denki is interested," she paused, "Is it just a physical thing?"

Shinsou started to slowly move backward towards the building, "I'm sure you and your brother can have a lovely bonding experience discussing that in the future. If there isn't anything else I'd like to get back to my classroom. Alone."

Akari made a wounded noise, "I can take a hint," and Hitoshi was thankful until she added, "But Denki has my number if you're ever interested."

"Do you honestly believe I'd ask my boyfriend for his sister's number?"

The woman shrugged, "You're a smart man. You figure it out." Then, because everyone on the planet seemed to know about the Yes Cat Incident, she waved goodbye and meowed at him. She looked down at Pika who happily meowed right back, and then they left with a flourish.

 _This family will be the death of me._

A fellow teacher caught Shinsou's eye and winked. He must have been under the impression that the experience with Miss Kaminari wasn't a harrowing one. If there weren't still kids around he might tell that teacher where to shove it.

 _'World's Okayest Teacher' indeed._

* * *

Upon entering Amped Up, Shinsou was happy to see that Shishikura was nowhere in sight. Mina and Sero were taking care of the line with smiles a bit too mischievous for customer service. Best of all, Denki wasn't behind the till and instead sat at a table next to Jirou and across from Kirishima and Bakugou.

Hitoshi reached into his pocket and put on the garish pink ring that Pika had given him earlier that day, before walking up to his boyfriend and the others. Kaminari brightened up and tried to wiggle past Jirou to give him a hug, but stopped short after seeing his hand.

"Babe, did you get hitched in the last twelve hours? Wait, don't tell me you and Meat found out it was sexual tension all along because I will legit scream."

Shinsou showed off his ring, "Well, your niece wanted me to tell you she 'won', and your sister wants me to ask you for her number."

"I hate my fucking family."


	17. Chapter 17

Shinsou shrugged his shoulders, "I can't help being so irresistible to the Kaminari tribe."

"Oh yeah," Denki drawled, "Truly a blessing and a curse."

The purple-haired man leaned over to press a kiss on top of Kaminari's head, which the blonde accepted before tugging the man down by his shirt collar for a proper kiss on the lips. "Trying to short-change me in smooches, Mr. Yes Cat?"

Jirou snorted at the scene while Kirishima looked on in amusement. Bakugou continued to be an ice queen and ignore the group's very existence. He must be in a particularly sour mood today- usually he'd at least have a snappy thing to add. Shinsou would ask him what was wrong but he had a feeling that would only piss him off more.

Another tug on his collar got his attention. Denki smiled widely at him, "Did you have a good day at school? I hope you played nice with the other kids."

"Outside of interacting with your family it was a pretty smooth day."

If Shinsou were a braver man, or typing as MindWash, he might have said "I never play nice," and then winked at the blonde like he wanted to. He'd have to work on that.

"Did you know your niece wants to be a hero when she grows up?"

Kaminari made a pained sound, "Yeah. When she found out I had gone to UA for a bit she made me teach her 'hero stuff' for a month. I tried to pull my best Eraserhead and discourage her from talking to me about it."

"I'm sure dad would have been proud." Hitoshi huffed a small laugh, "Did it work?"

Denki smirked, "I think Kaminaris are immune. It didn't work when Aizawa-sensei did it to me, after all. You do the math." He paused before adding, "No, seriously. If it ever comes up, you're doing the math. I totally can't."

Jirou sighed, "Why are all of my hires the lowest scorers of our class."

"I've been wondering," Hitoshi began, "Why aren't you, Sero, and Mina not pro-heroes? You graduated, didn't you?"

Kirishima answered for her, "When me and Katsuki get our agency going- and I'm totally naming it GroundRiot- we're gonna hire Mina and Sero. We all agreed to it. They both tried the professional path after school and their antics kept them from even getting sidekick levels. We're already awesome as a team, and we know how smart our squad is, so when things get going they're coming with us!"

"Take out the 'we' in that, Shitty Hair," Bakugou growled.

Eijirou was unaffected, "He's into the idea too! I got him to promise," and leaned in to loudly whisper, "I'm not allowed to tell you how I got him to- but it was awesome, man."

The redhead's arm immediately hardened so he could take the punch that Bakugou threw at him. The couple was truly in sync. Shinsou would consider their kind of relationship a goal, but he was thankful neither party in his own had that kind of temper.

Jirou had a soft smile on her face when she responded, "I realized what I wanted more was my music career. I'm still playing big venues pretty often, that's one of the reasons Kaminari basically co-runs the shop. I love this cafe and I make sure our open mic nights always have a reserved space for heroes who play music. Sometimes I'll get called in to help with a villain, we all still have our licenses and get picked up if we're especially suited, but I'm happy balancing all the things I love."

Hitoshi was hit by a memory, "I thought you looked familiar, you're Earphone Jack right? I saw you fight that villain with the super hearing. A perfect fit for you, really. No wonder they asked for your help."

Kyouka nodded, "Yep. That was me. It was way too easy a fight, but it's always nice to destroy an evil-doer."

At that moment, Shinsou could especially see the side of her that kicked ass and took names. He had a feeling she spent a lot of time scolding her staff for being the goofballs that they are but still loved them deeply.

Denki was beaming, "I told you my friends are the coolest."

Hitoshi casually replied, "They're not too bad."

He had a feeling Bakugou would appreciate that answer, in particular. Nothing like a slightly insulting compliment to spice up a conversation. Which was what the ash blonde did whenever saying a nice word about someone came up.

Kaminari jabbed him in the side for the joke, but laughed a bit all the same, "All right, we get it. You're just too cool for us, huh?"

Bakugou uttered an offended scoff, "Why don't you do us all a favor and shut up? That better not be what you think, fuckhead."

Shinsou smiled, "I wasn't going to say I was too cool, but as long as you understand that it's true..."

"I told you to shut the fuck up!" Bakugou yelled.

Hitoshi was clearly enjoying himself, "And yet, here we are."

"Don't be a smartass, baggy eyes. Shut your mouth before I shut it for you. Do you prefer your crooked teeth in your mouth or on the floor?"

Kaminari came to his rescue, "Hey! That's my picked-a-dumb-fight boyfriend you're talking to! He obviously just enjoys getting a rise out of you like we all do."

Kirishima gleefully started to speak but Bakugou cut him off, "I swear to fucking All Might if you make any erection jokes I am leaving you."

The redhead pouted but recognized that the threat wasn't an empty one. He wasn't ready to be single because of a dick joke- no matter how funny he's sure it would have been.

Jirou changed the subject, "Denki has a secret admirer. Someone left him a rose and some chocolates outside of the cafe this morning. Looks like you've got competition, Lilac."

"You didn't eat it, did you?" Hitoshi couldn't help but think about Insan1ty as an option.

Kaminari vigorously shook his head, "No way! I might be stupid but I'm not an idiot."

Ignoring that shameful sentence, Kirishima asked, "Do you think it's from the creeper guy? He said he knows where you work…"

Bakugou nodded, "Obviously. Do you seriously fucking think people are lining up to screw Pikachu?"

Hitoshi kept his thoughts on that to himself.

Denki did not.

"Oh, come on! I'm a catch! I don't see you having a successful stream, Bakubro."

Jirou sighed, "He has a ridiculously huge fanbase and gets constant fan mail. He doesn't need a stream- he's a famous pro hero."

Kaminari ignored her extremely valid point, "Isn't the more important thing how we're gonna catch this guy? I'm not afraid of him. He seems pretty harmless. I'm more worried that he'd tell everybody about where I live. It'd only take one message in the chat if he signed in from a new account and IP address for everything to go haywire..."

"Don't worry, Kitten. We'll stop him," Shinsou promised. "He seems more infatuated than anything else, and that makes me think he wouldn't want to share you. So why would he tell other people where you were?"

"Hmmm, you have a point. I'm still kinda wigged out about it, though. Nobody saw him leave the gifts this morning, and it wasn't there when we first opened up. Maybe he's got an invisibility quirk? Or something stealthy."

"A definite possibility. I am happily unsurprised that Ch4rgeb0lt is so astute."

The group whipped around to see Shishikura standing proudly as though he hadn't just startled half the people in the cafe.

Seiji looked around the table, "Have we met before?"

"Whoa, it's that meatball guy from the licensing exams!" Kirishima cried while pointing to a now very uncomfortable looking Shishikura. "Dude, I am still totally annoyed at you for the whole stepping on me thing."

Bakugou didn't elect to say anything, because he was too busy lighting up his palms with increasingly larger explosions. He stood up from the table, the heat from his sparks growing hotter.

Kyouka slammed her hands down on the table, "Nobody is destroying my cafe! I'll hang you all with my earlobes!" The room went silent, and she stood calmly. "Bakugou. If you want to beat this man into the meatballs he makes, please do it outside ."

Katsuki cracked his knuckles, "Hear that, cum-sponge? Let's go out so I can turn your stupid face into ashes."

Shishikura took a step backward, "Actually, I'm quite fine in here. Thank you for asking."

Kirishima looked exasperated, "Dude, Bakugou doesn't ask for things when he's angry. He demands. You're screwed."

Shinsou would be lying if he said he wasn't enjoying this, "I'd say it was nice knowing you, but we both know it wasn't."

Unfortunately, Kaminari jumped in front of Shishikura. "Stop it! I don't know what he did, and it sounds super shitty, but you don't have to kill him! He's been helping out with my stalker and, even though he definitely doesn't seem like it, he's a nice guy!"

Seiji looked confused at the backhanded compliment, "Thank you?"

Denki gave a wide smile, "You're welcome, Meat!" before turning back to look at his friends. "How about you give him one more chance. If he does anything really bad then it's your call, but you probably beat him up just as hard when you fought."

Since Bakugou wouldn't listen to anyone but his boyfriend, Kirishima helped calm him down with a gentle squeeze around his shoulders. The fiery hands lowered slowly. "I'm watching you, beady eyes. You're lucky these guys give a shit."

Kaminari let out a relieved sigh, and Shishikura composed himself back to his usual poker face. "Well, that was bracing. Thank you, Ch4rgeb0lt, that was a close call."

Shinsou tried not to let his disappointment show when he looked at Bakugou, "Don't worry, there's always next time."

The ash blonde sat back down and leaned back to prop his feet up on the table. Jirou must have given up trying to stop it because she seemed resigned to his rudeness.

"In the spirit of goodwill I'd like to apologize for any harm I caused you during the licensing exam," Seiji had regained his cool demeanor.

"Are you joking? We beat the shit out of you. The second we realized your quirk had a distance limit we rolled our meatball asses out of there and broke your face."

"Upon retrospect, I feel like I should be the one angry at you two and not the other way around."

Kirishima shook his head, "You still stepped on me. Not cool. Plus, you spoke badly of Katsuki and I can't forgive that."

Shinsou imagined that Bakugou was warmed by the sentiment, but he'd have to have a death wish to mention it. Now that Hitoshi has a cute and funny boyfriend he isn't going to give in to his usual spiral of existential dread. Nihilism is a lot less appealing when you can cuddle with someone.

Kaminari nervously played with his hair, "So, uh, this whole stalker thing is super weird, right? Plus the weather is...sunny?"

Bakugou ignored him, "I'm not angry about fighting with a meat-fucking loser. What kind of stupid nerd has to pay for a boyfriend?"

Hitoshi cleared his throat, "I am _right_ here, Bakugou."

"Good. Then I don't have to fucking yell it."

Well, as long as they were on the same page about the stream shaming.

Seiji stood up straighter, "It is in regards to the stalker that I have come today. I followed up on the charge made against him that I sent to the local hero agencies early this morning. I was told they would spread the word, but not that they would personally handle it."

Denki sighed, "Guess we're doing it ourselves."

"It'll be fine," Shinsou pulled Kaminari into a sweet embrace, whispering, "This isn't to piss off meat, I just wanted to hug you."

The blonde laughed, "But pissing him off is a pretty sweet bonus, huh?"

 _Fuck, Denki knows me too well._

"I just realized this cafe has led to so many relationships!" Kirishima started to count on his fingers, "You and Shinsou, that frog girl and the brunette she was with..."

Kaminari nodded, stepping away from his boyfriend but remaining close, "We really should have named it 'Thanks For The Lay', but I don't think Jirou would go for it."

Jirou swatted Denki across the back of his head, "No. Jirou would not go for it. You're lucky I don't take the dumb shit you say out of your paycheck."

The blonde held a hand dramatically against his chest, "Dude, no! I'd be so broke."

"While this is all very entertaining," Shishikura hummed, "What are we going to do about our unwanted admirer?"

"Our?" Shinsou raised a brow.

Kaminari put a finger to his chin in thought, "There's only one option that comes to mind, but Meat can't come with us."

Since the Bakusquad shared a strange kind of psychic connection, the five nodded at each other before Kirishima clarified, "Aizawa-sensei! Let's go see him! You know where he is, right? Field trip!"

"No way. Dad would literally murder me if I brought you all there."

Kaminari snickered, "As if. Your parents are such pushovers for you, it's amazing." He turned to the others to add, "You should have seen him and Yamada-sensei! They were all 'Ohh my baby!' and it was really cute but really scary too. He hasn't changed at all."

Seiji looked appalled, "Mindwash, am I supposed to believe that Eraserhead is your father?"

Oh, it felt so good to say, "Yes, and Present Mic is my papa. I'm sure your lineage is fascinating, though. Remind me, how many heroes raised you, Meat?"

Shishikura quietly smoldered, "Some of us don't need famous parents in order to get somewhere in life."

"Obviously," Bakugou added, gesturing to Seiji, "Some people can get somewhere shitty with or without well-known parents. Just look at this fuck."

Jirou shook her head, "I'm not going into the lion's den with you five. I'll say hi to him when he's not regretting everything he's done, thank you very much." She looked at the cafe's counter to find Mina and Sero playing catch with a ball of tape while gossiping, and appearing generally unprofessional. "Plus, someone has to watch this place. I know the second those two hear that you're going they'll be no stopping them from joining you."

Denki became excited, "I'll go tell them!"

He ran towards the other Bakusquad members and leaned over the counter far enough that he had to stand on the tips of his toes, which his boyfriend found adorable. Hitoshi couldn't make out what they said but Sero, Mina, and Kaminari managed a pretty impressive three-person high five in response. Then the pink girl called out, "I'm in!" and scrambled around the counter to meet the others. Sero used his tape to grab the "Bach in a second!" sign and placed it in front of the register.

Jirou made an all-suffering sigh and went to take over for the deserters, "Have fun. Tell Aizawa-sensei that I specifically didn't go because I thought it would make him happy to see fewer students."

Kyouka was probably right.

Sero wore his usual toothy grin, "When do we leave?"

Shinsou shrugged, "Now is as good a time as any."

The meat hero's eyes lit up, "Meeting Eraserhead would be an honor. His work is most impressive."

Kaminari looked to the side, "Sorry, Meat. I don't think Aizawa-sensei would like anyone else there, much less strangers. You'll have to stay here this time. I promise I'll give you a full report or whatever, though!"

Shinsou held eye contact with Shishikura, "Oh, Meat can't come with us? How tragic."

"You don't have to rub it in!" The shorter purple-haired man grunted.

"I really do."

Seiji humphed, "I wouldn't want to go if this was the company, anyway. I shall wait to earn the right to meet Eraserhead in the field as an accomplished hero."

"You'll be waiting forever," Hitoshi responded.

Kaminari gently slapped Shinsou's arm but offered no resistance when that same arm wrapped around his waist.

The blonde affectionately leaned against his boyfriend's chest, slightly nuzzling him while he did. Hitoshi looked at Shishikura and found he couldn't have stopped the Aizawa-grin from happening, even if he wanted to.

 _Game over, Meat._

Seiji had clearly had enough of this behavior, as he straightened his immaculate costume. "I shall return to my duties then. Perhaps I will come back later for further assistance and a debriefing."

"I wouldn't bother," Shinsou drawled, "Denki will be staying with me tonight. For safety reasons, of course."

"Of course," Shishikura echoed, before nodding at Kaminari with a meaningful look and walking out of the cafe as though he hadn't been thoroughly beaten in love. Or at least that's how Shinsou saw it.

Hitoshi pulled Denki a bit closer against his side, "Are you all ready to leave now?"

"Yeah!" Kirishima fist pumped happily, "This is gonna be the best!"

"I bet you he'll be super happy to see us too," Mina added.

Shinsou didn't have the heart to tell her not to get her hopes up.

* * *

By the time the gang had reached the hero duo's building, they were practically shaking. The nervousness radiating from the six of them was palpable. They stood frozen in front of the imposing apartment door and imagined all of the horrible ways they could die.

"Hey, guys…" Mina began, "Maybe we should just try again tomorrow...or never."

Bakugou grunted, "Don't be a coward."

"Think he'll get angry? He wouldn't hurt us, right?" Sero asked.

Shinsou smiled, "Little known fact: Dad keeps a knife in his belt."

The Bakusquad audibly swallowed.

"No pressure," Kirishima whispered.

"Let's see if they're even home," Shinsou knocked his fist against the door three times.

They heard a loud voice from inside the house suggest that another person answer it. Which meant that, in a moment, it swung open to reveal an especially disheveled and incredibly unhappy Eraserhead.

Aizawa realized just who was there and then immediately honed in on Hitoshi. He looked as shocked as is possible on his expressionless face and sputtered, "You brought _them_ to our house?!"

 _Sorry, Dad._


	18. Chapter 18

"We need your help with a stalking problem, Dadzawa! We need to ask the best, so of course we came to y-"

Their former teacher cut Kaminari off, "The district mentioned this case, but they did not tell me it would mean I would have to deal with the five of you. Three years were more than enough. Solve your own problems," and Aizawa started to close the door.

Shinsou caught it just in time with his foot, "Dad."

Shouta turned to look at his son with exasperation, "Are you trying to tell me that, not only are you flirting with one, but you have been voluntarily spending your time with these problem children?"

Hitoshi felt sweet satisfaction well up in his chest as he realized his chance had finally arrived. The time had come for some shovel payback.

"Actually, Kaminari and I are dating, but they aren't all that bad, dad. They only threatened to kill me a few times. Perfect sweethearts, really. "

Four pairs of eyes stared up at their former teacher in horror, while Bakugou fell into a combat stance.

Aizawa's hair flew up in the vicious way his quirk causes as he stared down the Bakusquad, "You threatened what to my son?"

Mina spoke first, "Uh...we threatened to love him very much?"

Shouta's hair was still standing up in anger as he narrowed his eyes further at the five of them, "You realize that you are no longer children, or my students, and I have absolutely no problem breaking you like Midoriya does his arms, yes?"

"I am more aware of that fact now than I have ever been, sir." Kirishima's voice broke at the end when he spoke.

"I'll fucking take you on. This doesn't have shit to do with stupid Pikachu, either. I just want to see the look on your face when I crush you!"

Sero rushed to cover Bakugou's mouth "Please forgive our grumpy Pomeranian, we've only just managed to train him not to bite the mailman," and then stage whispered, "He's a rescue ."

They heard an ear-splitting laugh from behind Aizawa, and soon Present Mic was standing beside him. Hizashi put a calming arm around his husband's shoulders, "Come on, Shouta. Think of the cats! If you go to jail I'll feed them too much. Making their futures full of just laying around all day meowing somberly and having fleeting memories of the better times when you were home."

Denki gave a nervous laugh, "Wow, Pops. You really painted a picture there."

Aizawa's hair gently fell against his shoulders again, and his eyes had stopped glowing with the promise of a very painful death. Four relieved exhales filled the room, and one disappointed "hmph". All Shinsou could do was smile, thankful for his papa's damage control and for the chance to scare the shit out of the Bakusquad.

All is fair in love and threatening extreme bodily harm.

Sero squinted at his former teacher, "You're starting to get gray hairs."

"No. I started to get gray hairs when I began teaching your class." Eraserhead sighed deeply, "Give me one good reason I should let you into this house?"

Mina tried, "Cause then you get to see your precious students?"

"I said a _good_ reason, Ashido."

After which, Sero quietly murmured, "Burn."

Kirishima took a crack at it while utilizing his most hopeful and innocent expression, "Sensei, we won't bother you for long. We came for your awesome advice but if you don't wanna give it that's okay. We'll leave you and Mic-sensei alone. Sorry we wasted your time..."

A few beats passed before Aizawa took a step back, "Get in before I change my mind."

The group cheered far too loudly for their Sensei's taste, as they filed in and soon the lot of them were standing in the living room and being incredibly nosy. Sero was sorting through Mic's expansive collection of music memorabilia, Kirishima immediately made himself comfortable on the couch, and Mina plucked the Midoriya cat off the floor before it could flee- which it started to do the second it saw Katsuki walk in. Kaminari started to introduce the pets, but Bakugou was already staring down a very angry cat that had run into the room at the commotion.

Cat Bakugou appeared to be glaring until it sat down in front of his namesake and lifted it's head as if to say, "You have been given the honor of petting me." Katsuki bent down to scratch him behind the ear and a growly purr filled the room.

Hizashi looked delighted, "Wow, he's never liked a human outside of Shouta and Hitoshi before!"

Mina nodded sagely, "It probably recognizes its own kind."

Katsuki and Cat Bakugou both hissed at Ashido at the same time. The rest of the squad busted out laughing, much to the ash blonde's displeasure. He was about to chew them out for it with a charming, "Listen, you fuckers-" before the angry cat leaped up onto the couch and settled in Kirishima's lap. The redhead started petting the animal way too hard and making cooing noises, but that didn't seem to bother it. In fact, the cat was reveling in the man's attention.

For the sake of the Aizawa-Yamada household, no one instigated the inevitable explosion that would have come from pointing out the further similarities between the two Bakugous.

Hizashi outstretched his arms and gestured to the room, "How does it feel to be in the home of your favorite teachers?"

"It's actually super cool," Mina said while precariously holding the still squirming Midoriya cat under one arm, and fiddling with a limited edition figurine of Present Mic with the other.

Kirishima continued to roughly stroke the unusually calm Bakugou cat while agreeing, "I forgot how much I missed you guys!"

Aizawa seemed displeased, but that was his general demeanor. "You aren't here for tea and cookies."

Shinsou could practically hear his blonde papa's desire to offer them tea and cookies now that it had been mentioned.

Their annoyed sensei cleared his throat, "I'll need to go over the facts before any hypothesizing. Are you all paying attention?"

The Bakusquad was, despite their usual manner, taking the situation quite seriously. They all focused quickly on Shouta, prepared to help as best they could.

Aizawa started by collecting more information on the case, "Firstly, how was it that this man came to know Kaminari?"

 _Oh fuck. I didn't even think about having to explain this._

"Well, dad...It's sort of like, um, something with his job? Yes. It's something."

Shouta narrowed his eyes in confusion, "You mean the man met him as a barista?"

"Not exactly. Denki has a second job. Work. He...works."

Sero chimed in, helpful as always, "He's trying to say that Kami is a camboy!"

Aizawa looked at Kaminari and frowned, "When you dropped out of UA I really didn't think it would end up with you doing this kind of work."

The blonde covered his face with his hands, "NOT THAT KIND OF CAMBOY!"

"Mostly he makes jokes and eats ramen," Mina added.

Hizashi looked disturbed, "Well, all sorts of people are into all sorts of...things," he turned to Shinsou and placed a solemn hand on his shoulder, "Son, I'll always love you. No matter what oddly specific fetishes you have."

"It's not in a dirty way!" Denki defended, "It's more like...a professional friend?"

Aizawa arched an eyebrow as Kaminari continued to dig his own grave.

"I keep people company for money? You know, for when they are lonely? Usually late at night. But it's mostly eating! Oh god, this is only sounding worse and worse but I swear I'm not taking my clothes off!"

"It's true," Sero said with great satisfaction. "He keeps his clothes on when he does the really dirty stuff."

"You are NOT HELPING!"

"Dads," Shinsou started hesitantly, "I always felt really alone after coming home from work. He helped keep me company during some really hard times and he gives many others happiness too. Denki's job is basically hanging out with people and making them feel like friends. Or more, but not in a sexual manner."

Hizashi did his best to understand, "So you had...an internet boyfriend?"

"That's certainly a better description than anything else that's been said today," Hitoshi shrugged.

Aizawa brought them back to focus, "Disregarding that still being weird, and we are definitely discussing this later Hitoshi, if I want you brats out of here it means getting back to business. Now, the stalker was a fan of Kaminari's... show ...yes?"

The Bakusquad nodded.

"From what little of the case I've been told, he has discovered Kaminari's home and was reported to have been taking photos."

"The fucker keeps sending him shit even after they warned him," Bakugou added.

Denki perked up, "One of my viewers was the one who brought the case to the agencies around here. He did manage to get the IP addresses used both times, and said they were both coming from either in or near the cafe!"

Shinsou concluded, "Therefore the culprit has most likely been inside Kaminari's place of work and possibly even spoken with him as a customer. Denki never noticed anyone taking pictures, so it was either done subtly or from outside the cafe."

Hizashi stroked his thin mustache, "So that young hero who came to the agency with this information is also one of your fans?"

Kaminari nodded awkwardly, prepared for a horrible follow-up.

"Ha!" Yamada cried, "Of course our boy is the only one good enough to actually date such a well-known man!"

Shinsou was glad that this, of all things, was what his papa decided to take away from the conversation.

"Yep," Denki smiled, "Shinsou's the best!"

Hitoshi tried to look unaffected but his dads always saw right through him. He could have sworn he saw a sadistic twitch on Aizawa's lips at getting to see his son be made uncomfortable.

 _Gee, thanks._

"Regardless of your feelings for my son, I'm going to cover some basics of stalking. When it comes to stalkers there are some core behaviors that can give them away. They will often manufacture reasons to be nearby, collect information or personal belongings of their victim, unexpectedly show up in the same place as you, continuously make unwanted contact, and may even give gifts- anonymous or directly- with the expectation of returned affection."

That certainly sounded familiar. Their unknown perpetrator fit the description well. Even though it was, supposedly, an unintentionally terrifying gesture of love on his part.

"Above all, stalkers desire a response from their victims. Ignoring them doesn't make them go away. They are deliberately trying to incur fear, or whatever relevant emotion, in a way that they can see. That's what they get out of this. Watching their subject's discomfort, and feeling in control. Powerful, one might say. They can get someone to change their whole life in an effort to escape them, and that feeds even more into the craving for ownership over their object of obsession."

Shinsou noticed his father's well-informed speech had done an excellent job in unsettling his boyfriend. The purple-haired man intertwined his fingers with Denki's and pulled him closer. He'd remind him however often he needed to that he wasn't alone during all this. He had nothing to fear with his lover and friends around.

Shouta continued, "The key is to avoid contact as much as possible and stay with at least one other person as often as possible," Aizawa then turned to his son and sarcastically added, "I'm sure that'll be a real hardship for you.

Thanks, dad.

"Lastly, save and document any communication or contact that this person has with you. Considering the evidence we have so far, we can do little else but send them off with a warning. Stalking tends to escalate, so it would be best to get as much information as possible for when you submit the full case."

"Spooky!" Mina whispered.

Shouta nodded at the pink girl, and then turned to the shortest blonde in the room "You live above the cafe, Kaminari?"

"Yeah, with Jirou! She says hi, by the way. We still talk about your 'logical ruses' sometimes."

Aizawa ignored the second part of his answer, "If this guy is watching you as closely as it sounds then it won't be long until he figures out you don't leave the building each night. You have a couple of immediate options. You could routinely go with one of your friends to their house and see if anyone follows you; embrace that he may know in which case you could cover the place in cameras; or even use yourself as bait to force his hand. There are plenty of other things that come to mind, but given your situation, but those are the first things I suggest. When it comes to stalking we have the advantage of two important things: we already know where the crime will take place, and who the intended victim is. Use these facts wisely."

The room was quiet until Denki broke the silence, "Dude, that's freaking terrifying. I don't think this case is even that bad," he clasped his hands to his chest and excitedly added, "But that was so badass! You know everything! Hitoshi, your dad is so cool! I want one!"

Shinsou snorted, "You act like he wasn't your teacher."

"Anything he taught me has been totally overshadowed by him being your father. Just saying."

Aizawa drawled, "Good to know those months of intense hero training didn't go to waste."

Bakugou shook his head, "You idiots are blowing this way outta proportion. You're talking about some fucking next level shit. The guy just wants to fuck Discount Pikachu, and probably cut off some of his ugly hair."

"Ewww, Katsuki!" Denki grimaced before putting together the rest of the sentence, "Hold up. What do you mean ugly hair?!"

"I'm the superior blonde, fuckface. Get over it." If Bakugou had hair long enough to dramatically flip over his shoulder then this would have been the moment for it.

"I agree with them, dad. I don't actually think this person means him any serious harm. It's more of a misguided love than anything else."

Hizashi wore a knowing smile, "Shouta, was that just a chance for you to show off for the kids?"

"That would be incredibly childish. I was merely sharing information that could be important."

"While looking super cool at the same time?" Kirishima asked.

"Will saying yes to that stop you from continuing to throw platitudes at me?"

Sero smirked, "Definitely not. You've always been a super superhero to us."

Bakugou didn't nod, but he didn't shake his head either so he probably agreed.

Since Aizawa would never cry at such a touching scene, Yamada did it for him. "You kids! I'm so glad Shouta basically- and literally with our baby Hitoshi- adopted you! I told him he'd end up taking all you little ones under his wing. I've seen him expel entire classes, but all of you were precious to him. It makes me want to cry just thinking about it!"

Shouta gave Hizashi an awkward pat on the back to comfort him, "Stop that."

Which, to be fair to Aizawa, has successfully gotten Hizashi to stop crying before. Shinsou thinks it must be a part of their dynamic that his dad's straightforward statements are received with fond appreciation from his papa.

Seeing the expression of teary happiness on their loudest sensei brought tears to Mina and Kirishima's eyes, and the latter added a quiet, "Love is so manly!" afterward.

"We do not have emotions in this household. This is a strictly stony-faced home," Aizawa paused, "Except for Hizashi, but he's the only permitted exception. Did I teach you children to cry?"

Sero laughed, "No but you made me break into tears, like, twice at least. Your training was tough as fucking balls."

Yamada scolded him, "Stop using that kind of language in front of the cats! They'll pick it up! Bakugou has been damaged enough-"

Katsuki glared.

"I mean the cat Bakugou," Hizashi clarified. Though they all knew you could say the same thing about the human one.

Kaminari jumped in, "Sero is still right. You totally made me sob like a little bitc- I mean, uh...like a baby."

Present Mic looked at Aizawa fondly, "That's my man! Breaking children's spirits and taking names."

Shinsou sighed, "I'm not sure you should be encouraging him. You're supposed to be his self-restraint."

"We've gotten off topic," Aizawa groaned, "I've told you kids what to do. There is no reason for you to be invading my personal life any more than you already have. Now drop my cats and get out of here."

His students knew better than to linger and only stopped to give hugs to Hizashi before they left. Kaminari gave the blonde an especially tight squeeze and got one in return. Hitoshi was glad that his boyfriend got along with half of his parents, at the very least.

Their former homeroom teacher walked them to the door, definitely because he wanted to make sure they actually left and waited till they were all outside the doorway to put a threatening hand on Denki's shoulder.

"Kaminari," Aizawa stared the boy down, "If you even slightly hurt my son I'm going to share middle-school photos of you. Don't think I don't still have the yearbooks."

"That's not actually that bad," Mina replied.

"Right," Shouta added, "I forgot to mention the part where they won't find your body till it's nothing but dust. Cementoss owes me a favor and you'd get a nice deep grave. Four words, Kaminari: _Don't_ upset my boy."

The door slammed shut and the Bakusquad stood there, still feeling the wrath of Aizawa's attitude.

Denki smiled at Shinsou, "I think he likes me!"


	19. Chapter 19

"Well, that was a disaster," Sero paused and corrected himself. "An _informative_ disaster, at least. Plus, I think we got ourselves on Dadzawa's eternal shit list. Kinda wish I'd told him I wasn't there for the Shinsou threatening."

Mina frowned, "You were super disappointed that you didn't get to hit him when we had him. You basically punched him in spirit."

"Thanks for not saying that in front of Dadzawa," The tape hero groaned.

Nothing could stop the hapless grin on Kirishima's face. "If he kills us he'd make it quick. He's not _that_ mean." Bakugou seemed excited at the prospect of a possible fight in the future.

Kaminari patted his boyfriend's back, "We'll be fine! Shinsou has him wrapped around his finger. You'll bail us out, right 'Toshi?"

"You seem to have a very optimistic view of my father. When I was younger a lady once shoved me to get to her grocery cart. To this day, Dad will bring her up angrily in conversation."

"I told you," Sero whined, "Eternal. Shit. List."

Shinsou wrapped an arm around Denki's shoulders and whispered to him, "Trust me, he actually does like you dating me. You'd be a stain on the carpet if he didn't."

Kaminari wore a nervous smile, "That's...reassuring?"

"Plus, now papa thinks you're a famous guy breaking hearts on the internet."  
The blonde batted his yellow eyes, "I'm not _not_ breaking hearts. Though I do feel kind of bad about Meat. You were being way too mean...I guess we both were. He really likes me, you know? It doesn't feel right for me to brush him off like I've been doing..."

Shinsou would be lying if he said he agreed. He'd admit that if he were in Shishikura's position he'd be hurt. However, he was the jealous and protective boyfriend in this situation, and it was a lot harder to feel sympathy. "Let's talk about this later. You still have a stream to run. Will you come to my apartment tonight? Just to play it safe."

Kaminari winked and laid a hand on his chest, "Playing it safe, huh? You mean like condoms, or what?"

Hitoshi turned three different shades of red before sputtering, "I meant because of the stalker." Seeing his boyfriend turn on the charm was always an exciting but jarring moment. Shinsou just didn't have the experience of what to do with someone actively trying to flirt with him. Hell, the last time he'd been met with any kind of positive response from someone he found cute it had turned into the unforgettable "Yes Cat" he was now forever known for.

One of these days he'd have to find that Instagram post and see how exactly Denki described it. He hoped it was in a positive light, or he'd never have the courage to leave the house again.

Kaminari laughed loudly at his reaction and grabbed his face to bring him down into a soft kiss as an apology- a very welcomed apology.

"I guess if I _have_ _to_ then I'll stay over at your place tonight. Not gonna lie, I'm happy to be away from the cafe with this weirdo running around. Though I think Mic-sensei was right. Dadzawa was _definitely_ showing off. He totally knows the case isn't that bad."

Shinsou smiled at how invested his father had gotten while helping them. He could tell the man relished getting a chance to be their teacher again, and it warmed his heart to see him be parental to his new friends. "Yeah, I think he was too."

Mina chimed in, "It was kinda cute, right?"

Kirishima and Sero nodded while Bakugou rolled his eyes and started to walk down the hallway, "We gonna head out or what? Any fucking day now would be great."

The Bakusquad scurried after him because they knew full well they'd be in trouble if they didn't haul ass when Katsuki told them to. He may have been the squad mom, but he ruled the same way his own mother did- frighteningly. Under all the rage and discipline was affection, but it was hard to remember that when you were being beaten upside the head with your own homework for asking a dumb question.

Before heading out of the building's front door, Kaminari turned to hold Shinsou's hand and pulled him along so the two were side-by-side. The night air was cool but no biting wind ran through it. It was just him, the man he loved, and the crazy gremlin people he called his friends.

The six of them walked down the street towards the train station, so each could go to their individual (with the exception of Bakugou and Kirishima) homes. The conversation was light and idiotic in that comforting way Shinsou has grown to treasure. Having the bubbly blonde stuck to his side certainly didn't hurt, either.

Then, a surprised voice called out, "Is that you, Bakugou?"

The group looked up and saw none other than Midoriya, Tsuyu, a man who looked incredibly like Tsuyu, Todoroki, and Uraraka.

Mina clutched a hand to her chest, "Oh shit! It's the Dekusquad! Do we have to have a showdown? I'm not ready! I can't remember the rules of gang wars, and none of us are wearing matching outfits!"

Sero put a calming hand on her shoulder, "Chill. You could always just challenge them to a dance battle. You'd wreck 'em."

Kirishima nodded, "If it comes down to that you have to let me pick the costumes. I'm a fashion master." Politely, nobody brought up his crocs.

The two groups shortly met, and Katsuki laid his eyes on Shouto. "Fucking Climate Change is here? Wish I believed you weren't real."

Todoroki continued with his bored expression, "It's nice to see you too, Bakugou."

Midoriya scolded Katsuki, "Hey, Climate Change is a serious problem, Kacchan! And don't call Shouto that."

"If Todoroki is climate change, then Izuku's gotta be the temperature," Kaminari said authoritatively. When nobody responded he elaborated, "Ya know, cause he makes him go up and down?"

A chorus of groans rang out, but Sero gave Denki a highly approving fist-bump.

Izuku looked confused until Uraraka leaned over and whispered an explanation into his ear. The green-haired man sputtered and tried to defend himself when Eijirou cut him off.

"Hey Todoroki," Kirishima started, "If you go to sleep on your right side and you drool, does it end up as icicles?"

In that magic way that only the Bakusquad can, the others stopped everything to stare searchingly at Kirishima, as though he had just raised the world's deepest question.

"Fuck," Sero muttered, "I never even thought of that."

Denki scratched his head, "Do you think it would boil if he slept on his left side? Or just evaporate real fast?"

Shinsou had to admit it was a fair question. He turned to Midoriya to ask, "Which one is it?"

Izuku averted his eyes, "What makes you think I would know?"

The purple-haired man nearly laughed, "You're literally dating. I shouldn't even have to list reasons, but here are a few recent ones: The last time I saw you, you were drunk and practically on his lap. You went home together that night and," he pointed at Uraraka, "she told me you both came late to meet her the next morning. With hickies."

Mina cut to the chase, "But mostly? You're just super gay for each other. Like, _it hurts_ levels of gay. We already thought you've been fucking since like...first year? You two had definitely exchanged at _least_ one awkward handjob before our third."

The Bakusquad solemnly nodded, except for their leader who looked like he was about to be sick.

"Fucking hell! Don't talk about shitty Deku and handjobs! When I vomit I'm aiming for your shoes, Raccoon Eyes!"

Sero grinned toothily, "So blowjobs are okay to talk about then? 'Cause Tokoyami, that poor birdy, once told me he found those two in a classroom and they wer-"

Bakugou sprung into action and held a smoking hand against Sero's neck, "I HOPE YOU HATE BREATHING BECAUSE YOU'RE NEVER DOING IT AGAIN!"  
Tsuyu's tongue whipped out and slapped Sero backward till he was no longer pressed up against a lethal palm, "Can you all at least pretend to be adults in front of my baby brother?"

The group turned to look at the young man beside her. They'd noticed him at the beginning but they could see the family resemblance a lot more when the two stood next to each other, arms bent and faces round.

Tsuyu glared at her younger brother, "This is Samidare. He's the problem child. I caught him trying to follow us to the bar earlier and now I'm stuck babysitting."

"I'm 20! I'm old enough to drink." The young Asui replied, arms crossed. He turned to look to the others for help when his eyes landed on the blonde. He squinted at Denki before snapping his fingers triumphantly, "I know you! You're Mr. Chargebolt!"

The Bakusquad proceeded to have the world's most silent and simultaneous heart attack.

Kaminari swallowed loudly, "What did you call me?"

Samidare looked puzzled, "You know, the hero Chargebolt? At the sports festival. That was your name, wasn't it? I was bummed out when Tsuyu didn't make it to the finals, but your fight was pretty funny. It'd be hard to forget the guy who went all stupid on national TV."

The squad let out a breath of relief in unison and tried not to let their panic show. Despite being essentially made fun of, Denki obviously preferred it to being found out as a camboy. Especially by the frog girl's younger brother.

Tsuyu's tongue poked out of her mouth as she thought aloud, "Now that I'm looking at you closer, I vaguely remember you. Someone turning 'stupid' in the middle of a sports festival fight does sound familiar."

Kaminari winced, "Glad to be memorable in the worst way."

Shinsou poked the blonde's chest, "You see what it's like? This is your Yes Cat."

"Dude. I am so sorry."

Mina couldn't stop cackling at the scene, and Sero was doing a poor job of staying serious while watching their friend suffer. Kirishima comforted Denki with a pat to the back that looked too hard. The man wasn't aware of his own strength and his manly affection had a habit of feeling more like a thwack than a pat.

Uraraka walked towards Kaminari with an outstretched hand, "We've never formally introduced ourselves- though I've certainly heard plenty about you," she winked, "I'm Ochako. We saw each other at the cafe last week, but only for a little. We went to school together? You really do look different. I should have guessed from your eyes in the picture, though."

Denki cocked his head, "You saw a picture of me?"

"Yeah, Shinsou showed it to me when he was still ugly pining after you."

The blonde paused heavily.

"Hitoshi, dear?" Kaminari grit his teeth, "I know you've never taken a photo of me. Want to tell me how your darling friends saw what I looked like?"

 _Oh fuck._

Shinsou mumbled, "I may or may not have told them about your...side job."

"You _what_?!" Denki punched him in the shoulder and proceeded to have a panic attack. "You told them about my job?! What the hell picture did you use? Please tell me you didn't show them the website."

The answer was muffled as Shinsou spoke into the arm that was rubbing his now bruised shoulder.

Bakugou looked sadistically delighted, "Yeah, fuck up. Where did you find it?"

Hitoshi sighed, "...I showed them the website."

Denki punched his other shoulder.

Shinsou appreciated that they were fairly light punches. His boyfriend might be pissed but he'd never actually hurt him. Then again, Hitoshi totally deserved it.

Samidare looked confused, "What's wrong with the website?"

Tsuyu looked at her little brother, "Apparently this purple idiot wasn't supposed to share with the world that Kaminari is a camboy."

Saridame screwed up his eyebrows, "What's a camboy?" To which Izuku happily cried, "Yes! It's not just me!"

Denki groaned and buried his face in Shinsou's chest, "I think I'm gonna quit being Ch4rgeb0lt and move to the Himalayas."

Bakugou scoffed, "Can you even spell Himalayas?"

"No, but the airport can," the blonde answered.

"Oh please," Mina laughed, "You wouldn't last a day without the internet. You'd start drawing memes in the sand with a stick and dreaming of what shitposting you're missing out on."

"In that case, I'll just spend my days making sick sand castles and talking to zebras or whatever they have there."

"I don't believe there are sand castles or zebras in the Himalayas," Todoroki spoke up.

"Shhh," Tsuyu said, "Just let them work it out for themselves. This is hysterical." She looked up to their tallest friend, "Shinsou, why didn't you tell me he was so adorably stupid?"

"Hey," Denki cried, "I'm smart where it matters! I'll have you know I've got a genius level IQ."

Sero snorted, "Spell 'IQ'."

Kaminari screwed up his lips, "Eat a syphilitic dick, you limp tape dispenser."

 _And he used to be so sweet. Katsuki is really rubbing off on them._

Sero went to shove him, but missed and pushed Bakugou over a bit instead. The ash blonde turned around with fire in his eyes and- _literally_ \- in his palms. "You really want to do this again, fuckmunch?!"

Kirishima used his quirk and quickly put his arms around Katsuki's waist. Keeping him from chasing Hanta who immediately hid behind Mina. Which looked ridiculous considering their height difference.

Tsuyu's brother watched the battle in awe, and Shinsou felt a little bad that his sister will forever be associated with having friends like these. He's also very glad that his dad wasn't here to watch this spectacle. Is this what class 1-A was like? No wonder Aizawa was so distraught at seeing them. Suddenly, Hitoshi wouldn't trade his grade-schoolers for anything. Even if it meant keeping Shigaraki in his class for two more years. Nearly decaying the class pet, once, pales in comparison to Bakugou trying to burn off his friend's faces hourly.

Izuku sighed, "It's like we never left school."

"I kind of missed it," Uraraka said, dodging a blast, "Ah...to be young again."

Tsuyu put an arm around her girlfriend's waist, "Honey, you're 25."

Another explosion sounded and a car tire rolled across the street before spinning in place and falling over with a thump. "Uh," Kirishima started, "I'll put that back on in a minute."

Somehow, the Bakusquad had decided this was a very fun game and were chasing each other around the street like children. Mina slid behind a car on her acid, while Sero used his tape to pull Kaminari out of the way of a narrowly missed shot of flame. Kirishima remained wrapped around Bakugou, now with one leg raised and looped over the other's knee for further traction, and was howling with laughter. The only person who seemed to be taking it seriously was the ash blonde firecracker battling his boyfriend so he could kill the brats he would protect from everyone but himself.

Shinsou kept off to the side, and gave Todoroki a commiserating look, "Was it really this bad during UA?"

Shouto nodded, but Midoriya shook his head fondly, "This is actually pretty tame."

"I don't know how you all managed it," Hitoshi watched Kaminari happily shriek as he ran past a tied-in-his-own-tape Sero. "Speaking of things that are being destroyed. We were talking about your arms with Aizawa earlier today."

Izuku nodded in understanding before adding, "Whatever it was must have been really bad."

"It could be," Shinsou smiled, recalling the terrified faces of his former tormentors, "and that's what matters."


	20. Chapter 20

Tsuyu looked at the giggling, or furious, squad members playing in the street, "Somebody stop the children before they lose their hero licenses."

"Musutafu is surprisingly lenient with property damage," Izuku informed, "Kacchan's efficient heroism makes up for his tendency to destroy everything in his path."

It was true, the Musutafu district was a very kind one. Shinsou had long lived in it, thanks to his parents wanting to be close to UA, and he was glad that Amped Up wasn't far. The city wasn't a tiny one, but everyone who was associated with the hero school lived in it. Perhaps it was it's proximity to UA that made them so used to destruction and insanity. Bakugou had probably been teaching the city how to deal with this kind of chaos since he started attending classes.

Sero stopped running and put his hands on his knees to catch his breath, "Okay...let's call a truce...We'll say you won this time, yeah Blasty?"

Bakugou stopped struggling as much in Kirishima's arms, "Of course I fucking won. I didn't even move and I had you little shits running for your lives!" The ash blonde lifted his foot and stomped on Kirishima's instep so he'd let go. Eijirou mumbled a "Babe!" but released his squirming boyfriend.

Once the rest of their squad could tell the coast was clear, Mina and Kaminari crept back out from behind the car they'd used as a shield. The hood only had a little damage. Nothing a garage shop couldn't buff out.

The five reunited in the middle of the street and headed back towards the sidewalk and the exasperated looking Dekusquad.

Asui's brother seemed to have a different impression, "That was so cool, you guys! And I don't get why you aren't a hero now, Mr. Chargebolt! You zapped Sero real good!"

Kaminari scratched the back of his neck, "I mean...I accidentally hit him in the crossfire, but I'll take the compliment."

"Thanks for that, by the way," Sero grumbled while trying to flatten his now staticky hair.

Denki gave him two thumbs up and let a small spark of electricity bounce from one hand to the other, "Anytime, bro."

The Bakusquad joined the others more closely, forming a near-perfect circle. "Near" because Bakugou refused to conform to any shape that someone who wasn't him dictated they make. He stood at least a good foot away diagonally from everyone else, quietly fuming.

Todoroki took one look at him and asked, very sincerely, "Are we done fighting now?"

Katsuki sneered, " We weren't doing anything. Why don't you shut your two-toned face and go play in a vat of acid."

Mina smiled, "I can assist with that!"

"Shinsou," Todoroki started, turning to the tall man, "You don't actually have to spend time with them. You're welcome to join us for the night, instead. We're planning on finding a nice restaurant."

"Restaurant? Blegh." Sero grimaced, before turning to the rest of his squad, " McDonald's?"

"McDonald's," they echoed back, except for Bakugou who sighed and resigned himself to the fact that he'd probably end up cooking dinner for them. He wasn't letting his loved ones survive on french fries and McFlurrys alone. Even if Mina did cry a bit when he first told her that.

"Not a fucking chance. We're headed back to mine and Shitty hair's and I'm making you idiots real food."

"Score!" Kirishima shouted, "You make the best food ever, babe."

Even the Dekusquad had to admit this was a fact, but they respected the illusion of gang animosity and refrained from vocally agreeing.

"You could join us," Kaminari pointed at Uraraka and Asui, "I feel like I haven't seen you two at Amped Up in ages!" he paused, "It does get pretty busy, though. Plus I work weird hours."

Tsuyu nodded, "I've been back a number of times. Ochako is in love with your brownies."

"Oh, the Brahms-ies?"

Uraraka sighed, "That one is a stretch."

"Totally." Denki agreed, "You can blame Sero."

Tsuyu raised an eyebrow, "Did he come up with it?"

Kaminari laughed, "Not at all, I just want someone to blame him."

Ashido pointed happily at the blonde, "It was actually Denki's idea!"

"Mina!" The blonde cried, embarrassed at being caught, "I'm calling human resources! This is harassment!"

Sero gave him a condescending pat on the back. "Dude, we have a staff of, like, four people. There are no human resources."

Kaminari crossed his arms in front of his chest, "Then I'm electing myself as the head of our HR department right now, and you'll be hearing from me later, young lady! I'll go on strike!"

"Will you fucking idiots ever learn? You're already on thin ice with Little Miss Earphones."

Sero looked at Katsuki with a fond expression, "You see how he cares for us? Our dearest Bakugou. Our foul-mouthed mom friend."

"Our fucking what now?! Do want your spleen tied in a bow or a noose? I'm easy." Bakugou immediately whipped his head towards Kaminari and Kirishima, "Fucking DON'T say what you're about to."

Judging by the disappointed looks on the two men's faces, Bakugou wasn't wrong in his guess.

Mina fell into hysterics at the very thought of it while Kaminari nodded approvingly, "10/10, would endanger my life for that joke."

"Your standards are real fucking low," Bakugou growled.

"I wonder what that says about his boyfriend," Sero pondered aloud.

Shinsou worded his next sentence very carefully, "Are you talking about me, Sero?"

Hanta rolled his eyes, "Of course I'm talking about you. Does Denki have some other boyfriend I don't kn-" The black-haired man's eyes went blank, and his posture relaxed.

"Go to the corner store, buy the soda you like the least, and then drink it," Hitoshi ordered. He might occasionally enjoy a quirk prank, but he mostly used his powers for good. Or petty spite between friends, apparently.

They all watched the man stiffly walk to the nearby convenience store and step inside. Shinsou knew his quirk well enough that he had at least five minutes of control over him at this distance.

Kaminari whistled, "Babe, I feel weird about saying this, but that was kinda hot."

Shinsou chuckled, "Are you saying that making your friend rot his teeth with something he doesn't like to drink is a turn on?"

Denki scrunched up his nose, "When you put it that way it sounds pretty gross…"

Izuku giggled, "This is even funnier than when you made Shouto tell our waitress that he was going to be her new father-in-law and that her mother would be hearing about the soup being cold."

Todoroki shouldn't have made that Aizawa joke without expecting some repercussions.

"Look! He's coming back!" Uraraka said while clapping her hands.

Sure enough, Sero started to blankly return to them with an open can of Diet Grape Fanta in his hand. When he was back in the circle they'd made, he stopped and sipped more of his least favorite beverage. His eyes remained dull and his expression vacant until Shinsou released his command while Sero was still drinking.

He spat it out immediately.

"What the fuck, man!?" The many different disgusted expressions Hanta went through were delightful. "That was legitimately evil."

"It really was," Todoroki agreed, "Make him do it again tomorrow. I like this trick a lot better when it isn't me." Izuku snickered and made a show of scolding Shouto with a batting hand.

Tsuyu just quietly extended a fist for Shinsou to bump his own against. Their friendship was one of true respect.

Kaminari snort-giggled, "Sweet flapjacks, that was hilarious."

"Really?" Sero whined, "You told me to eat a syphilitic dick earlier and now you're saying 'sweet flapjacks'? Where the hell was that kind of language when you were pissed at me?"

"It was probably too busy telling you to eat a syphilitic dick."

Sero fiddled with his half-empty soda can, "I hate you. You and your boyfriend. You deserve each other."

"Awww, thanks bro!" Kaminari cooed.

"Wait, damnit, I was trying to be rude!"

Samidare Asui looked beyond pleased. Half amused and half admiring the group of people he had met that night. The Bakusquad rarely left a good impression, so they were pretty proud of themselves for the way the young Asui smiled at their antics.

Shinsou almost missed Ochako slide her hand into Tsuyu's behind her little brother's back. He was incredibly happy that his two friends had gotten together, and seeing any sweet gesture between them made him smile. As Bakugou might have put it, 'It's about fucking time.'

Mina smiled, "The Dekusquad should totally come visit us at the cafe! You just have to promise that you'll fight Bakugou outside of it when you do."

"Don't you mean 'if'?" Izuku asked.

"Nope."

Which was fair. There is no way in hell that it wouldn't come down to a battle if Midoriya even put one foot into what Katsuki considered his territory. Hitoshi was honestly impressed that he hadn't tried to throw a punch at Izuku tonight. It seemed Bakugou had mellowed out a little since their school days, but if they stayed and spoke any longer it would probably come to blows eventually.

"I think I'll skip it for Kacchan's sake," Midoriya laughed nervously, as Todoroki placed a protective arm around him.

"Then my favorite lesbians should visit instead!" Mina cried, pointing at Tsuyu and Ochako.

Kaminari frowned and asked, "I thought Kyouka and Momo were your favorite lesbians?"

"Yeah," Mina answered, "But not when there are different lesbians in front of me. That's just how that works, stupid."

Uraraka laughed, "Well, even if it's only for now, I'm flattered."

"See? She gets it."

Sero shook his head at the pink girl but kept that toothy grin nonetheless.

"Oi," Bakugou turned to Kaminari with a frown, "Hey, Drooly. Move your stupid ass, you have to be a hooker in twenty minutes."

Denki checked the time on his beat-up phone, "Oh shit! you're right! Thanks, Bakubro!"

The ash blonde gave him a sneer, "Don't fucking thank me. I didn't do it as a favor, I just don't want to look at your dumb face anymore."

Kirishima smiled, "Isn't he so cute when he's nice?" and hardened his shin fast enough that it wouldn't hurt when Katsuki kicked it.

Kaminari laughed before he stretched his shoulders and legs in a dramatic show of finality, "Well, It's been fun y'all but I gotta go be friends with the internet! Nice meeting you, Mini-Asui!"

Samidare waved back at him, and Tsuyu did her best not to be embarrassed at her brother's appreciation of the Bakusquad. Shinsou could tell she was struggling with not laughing at them herself.

The blonde bounced around the circle to give everyone a hug, even those he barely knew, before running back to his boyfriend. Denki gave one last wave and then laced his fingers with Shinsou's. The blonde sweepingly gestured in front of them, "Lead the way home, hot stuff!"

Shinsou worried about the state of his apartment, which he knew was pointless since he kept things orderly, as he unlocked the door. He hoped Denki wouldn't comment on its noticeable emptiness or how sparse his furniture was.

He realized he didn't need to be concerned because, as soon as the door opened, Kaminari walked in as casually as if it was his own home. He politely took his shoes off and then made himself comfortable on the couch, "So this is the scene of the crime, huh?" When Shinsou gave him a quizzical look he elaborated, "You know, where you met me- so to speak?"

Hitoshi snorted, "Yeah. Right on that couch. It was a lovely date. Do you even remember when I first joined?"

"Must have been months ago, but it feels like it's been forever." Denki put a finger to his chin and cocked his head in thought, "Was that the day you gave me $10 to stop talking about Pokemon Go?"

"In retrospect, I still stand by that decision."

"I"m surprised you came back the next night. But, you don't even know how badly I wanted to keep doing it. Not to spite you," the blonde affirmed, "It was just because I'd caught a Dragonite and the world needed to know. I think I stole it away from the kid who was playing near me but whatever. Get on my level, child!"

"There are a couple of students who I would love you to say that to." Shinsou took off his coat and draped it over a nearby chair, "I'd tell you to make yourself at home, but you seem to have done that anyway."

Denki rolled his eyes, "Duh. I've already been in this room, like, a million times."

"From inside a laptop."

"Yeah, but I'm making an executive decision that it counts," the blonde snuggled further into the left side of the couch and kicked his feet up on the table, "I'll have you know I'm the head of a Human Resources department now, and my words are pretty powerful."

Hitoshi huffed a laugh and sat down next to Denki, "I'll keep that in mind." An important thought came to him, "My webcam isn't that great. It's just the standard kind that comes already installed on the laptop. Tonight's stream isn't going to look as good as it usually does."

Denki shrugged, "I'll make today's price $6 instead of $10 to even things out."

"Still being a terrible businessman, huh?"

"Hey!" Kaminari whined, "I'll have you know that a bunch of people give me extra money on cheaper nights anyway. Even the hot purple-haired ones."

Hitoshi leveled him with a look, "Plural?"

"Oops," Denki said, clearly unrepentant, through a crooked grin.

Shinsou batted at the blonde's leg with his foot, as he got up to grab his laptop. "I'll set it up on some books to bring it up to your face. Think that'll work?"

Kaminari looked at him so fondly that it made his heart flutter, "You're real sweet, you know that? You don't have to do all this for me."

"I couldn't tell you for sure," Hitoshi stated, "But I'm pretty confident that it's standard boyfriend etiquette to help you out. I think I read it in a magazine once."

Denki chuckled, "You have a magazine with an article about what proper behavior for setting up a laptop for your camboy boyfriend is? Man, the world sure has gotten more progressive."

If he wasn't holding his computer he might've searched for a pillow to throw at his snarky lover, but there was only so much time left before he had to go live. Shinsou planned on watching him from within the same room. Hopefully that wasn't as creepy as it sounded in his mind.

A stack of mostly Science Fiction books, and some fourth-grade level textbooks, were placed on the table. Hitoshi checked to see that it was sturdy before plugging the charger in and putting it down on its improvised set. "Alright, your professional studio is ready to go."

Denki grabbed Shinsou's arm to pull him down for a deep kiss. Once the man had gotten closer he wrapped both arms around his shoulders as he leaned back smiling, "I'm really lucky, aren't I?"

Hitoshi might not have agreed, but he absolutely adored that the man he loved thought so. Instead of an answer, Shinsou cupped his face and brought the blonde back for another kiss. His lips were soft and the purple-haired man took a moment to marvel at the way he was lip-locked with the beautiful boy he'd spent so many nights longing for on this very couch. He'd been so lost in the feeling that he unconsciously chased Denki's mouth when the blonde pulled back.

Kaminari laughed at the disappointed look Shinsou was giving him, "I have to start now. Can't waste the sweet set that my darling made for me, right?"

 _Please call me darling forever._

"I suppose so," Hitoshi answered instead, "I'll be out of the camera's view over on that chair. Unless you'd rather I go to my room?"

"Nah, I definitely want you here!" Denki's smile widened, "It'll make me happier to know that my favorite viewer is beside me."

Shinsou controlled his blush as much as possible and stepped away so the other man could prepare. Kaminari took a moment to brush through his hair with his fingers, and smooth down the wrinkles on his clothes. He even did an adorable little vocal warm up by making nonsense noises and then meowing at Hitoshi like the brat he was.

The purple-haired man might have rolled his eyes but he loved every second of it.

After checking the camera was in place, Denki logged in to the website through his own account and checked that everything was ready.

Kaminari winked at Shinsou as he audibly counted down the "3...2...1" before the red light of the webcam lit up. He beamed that familiar smile and shot a set of finger guns down at his laptop.

"Hey, sweet things! Did you miss me? I missed you!"


	21. Chapter 21

Shinsou watched with wonder as Kaminari fell into his routine as comfortably as if he'd streamed from Hitoshi's living room every night.

The purple-haired man had his phone out and was logged in to the chat, but spent most of his time watching Ch4rgeb0lt's profile as he laughed and played with his viewers. He looked particularly ethereal as the light from his laptop made the boy's smile shine even brighter. Paying attention to his phone was nigh impossible with such a beautiful creature in front of him. He was barely registering anything Denki was saying, too.

In an effort to tune back in, Shinsou scanned the chat box.

MeatMeOutBack29 was making a usual show of affectionate language and compliments, to which Denki humbly accepted and returned in kind. Too bad Seiji didn't have Hitoshi's boyfriend sitting in his living room.

Then, a realization hit him. A wonderful, horrible realization. Shishikura knew what Shinsou's house looked like. Hell, he'd slept on the same couch that Ch4rgeb0lt was currently perched on. There was no way he wouldn't recognize it.

He couldn't stop the Aizawa grin from creeping onto his face if he wanted to.

In the time it took for Shinsou to bask in this revelation, Meat must have picked up on the different setting. _"Are you somewhere new today? It's jarring to see you in a new location. Especially when it's one that isn't befitting of you."_

Kaminari gave his trademark grin, "I dunno, it's not too bad! Could use some color, but I still get to stream! That's what matters, right? Getting to see you lovelies!"

Reading that Meat appeared to be upset was incredibly satisfying. Hitoshi's face must have looked like the definition of smugness, and he was loving every second of it. Shinsou was barely able to hold himself back from stepping into the camera frame just quick enough that Seiji would see his telltale hair and shit-eating grin.

Denki leaned over to rub his nose against the webcam, "Eskimo kisses for everybody!" The chat broke out into various happy responses, _"gimmie!" "ASDBSFJADAGS YES PLZ." "y_ not _real kisses ;)"_ and Shinsou's own message, _"The people who know you must be so lucky, they can get Eskimo kisses all the time."_

Hitoshi saw Kaminari fondly roll his eyes, and then quickly avert them to meet purple ones with a smile. Shinsou wondered if anyone else noticed it, and reveled in the special attention. He was kissing him on the lips later, for sure.

As the chat went on, user Darkfire spoke up saying, _"no ramen tonight?_ im _lonely eating without you!"_

Ch4rgeb0lt snapped his fingers and gasped, "You're right! I totally forgot about dinner, but that's okay. I'll mime doing it now and it'll be like nothing changed." Denki proceeded to pose his hands as if holding chopsticks in one, and cupping an invisible styrofoam container in the other. He took a theatrical fake slurp of noodles and then pretended to wipe broth from the corner of his mouth.

As amusing as he found it, and as happy as it was making the other viewers, Hitoshi knew he'd be a horrible boyfriend if he didn't sneak one of his emergency Cup Noodle stashes to his lover as soon as possible.

Shinsou got up from his chair and walked around the camera, staying out of sight as he went to the kitchen cupboard to pull out one of his many shameful Cup Noodle boxes. He set the water to boil and even broke a pair of disposable chopsticks (unevenly, to keep up with Ch4rgeb0lt's hapless aesthetic) for the blonde to use.

While he waited for the water to heat, he picked up his phone and watched the stream. One of Kaminari's fans, username Nooooooo0o , was talking about how she was being bullied at school. Denki's face became very serious as he replied, "It breaks my heart to hear that. Bullying is done by cowards who feel like abusing power and taking control of others will make up for their sad empty lives. They try to fill the void in their hearts by taking the anger they have towards themselves out on others. It doesn't make it okay, and it certainly doesn't excuse their action, but that's often the truth behind that kind of behavior. Don't let anyone make you feel less awesome than you are. I've known you for a while, and you've only ever shown yourself to be a sweet and thoughtful person who has cheered up other people and brought a smile to my face many times. You have a precious heart and I want you to know that." Ch4rgeb0lt smiled and then lifted up two fists, "Also: if you tell me who this asshole is I'm gonna zap him so hard that his grandmother feels it. Nobody messes with one of my besties and gets away with it!"

Nooooooo0o typed back, _"_ Im _crying. Thank you ch4rgeb0lt. I love you so much,"_ and donated $10. Kaminari shook his head and tapped at his keyboard. The chat was alerted that the $10 was refunded, "You don't have to give me money for speaking the truth, sweetie. You go use that for something that makes you happy. Or put it towards a taser, just in case that ballsucker comes back."

Even Meat offered, _"I usually do not condone violence, but I suppose you could consider this premeditated self-defense."_ and Hitoshi found himself liking the annoying man a bit more. Only a little bit, though.

Shinsou could still hear Denki in the other room chatting happily with the stream when he had poured the freshly boiled water over the Cup Noodles. He walked back over quietly and stood behind the camera, soup in hand. Carefully, Hitoshi slid it just out of view from the screen, on the corner of the table Kaminari was perched in front of.

When Denki spotted the food his whole face started to beam, he grabbed it and held it up in front of his laptop. "Look! The magic Cup Noodles fairy has blessed me! Now I can eat with you all!" He proceeded to try and take a bite of noodles before he found it was way too hot and burnt the tip of his tongue- causing him to talk a little funny until he'd fanned it off with his hands. The chat loved it, but of course they did, adorably stupid antics were his forte. He didn't even need to work for it, the boy was a cute dork all on his own. Though some did ask if he was alright, and Meat checked in to see if he was _"properly being taken care of"_ or if he needed to _"smother the dreaded Cup Noodles fairy for not protecting you from hot food. He should be ashamed of himself. "_

Hitoshi couldn't help himself and typed, "At least someone is there to take care of him. I'm glad that Ch4rgeb0lt has somebody who can be there when viewers can't." The chat echoed this sentiment, though many added they were jealous of whoever it was. Kaminari assured them they had nothing to worry about, and that the Cup Noodles fairy had completed their job and flown away again.

Meat must have still been itching for a fight because he responded to MindWash with, _"I'm surprised you care so much for Ch4rgeb0llt, considering you are the personification of leaving the toilet seat up."_

Shinsou furrowed his brows before typing, _"What?"_

 _"I'm calling you obnoxious and unsanitary."_ Meat replied.

Hitoshi hoped that his snort was hidden underneath the sound of Denki's laugh, and he replied _"You know what? That was pretty good. I'm not even angry."_

He could practically see the pleased look on Shishikura's face when he typed back, _"Yes, I am quite proud of it as well."_

Denki continued to giggle at the exchange, and Shinsou realized that any noise the blonde made when he laughed was the most wonderful sound in the world.

It seemed the chat had also come to enjoy the Meat vs MindWash catfights as much as the two involved did. It had become part of the show, so to speak, and Hitoshi was surprised at how much he enjoyed making others happy. Maybe he'd try and be a bit more open in the chat than he usually was. Normally, he'd rarely speak if it wasn't in direct answer to something Ch4rgeb0lt said. It was this thought that made him reach out to the girl who mentioned being bullied. _"Hey, Nooooooo0o, you still there?"_

 _"Yeah, Wash?"_

Hitoshi looked over to Denki for guidance and found the blonde giving him a subtle but soft look and a nod. He started to type, _"I agree with Ch4rgeb0lt. Remember how special you are and don't let an asshole take that away from you. When I was younger I was bullied by my classmates every day. I never spoke up about it and hoped that someone would just notice and make it stop. If it weren't for my adopted dads finding me when it was happening, I don't think I would have ever figured out how to solve it on my own. You should always talk to someone about what is going on- especially a teacher. I know everyone here knows that I teach 4th grade, and I know you're a high school senior, but I can promise you it is our job to protect our children. Yes, my first instinct is to ask for this little shit's address and deliver some vigilante justice, but that only shows them that violence gets results. The best thing you can do is tell an adult and to not give up. If you do say something, but no one helps you and this kid continues, you can message me your school district as I will personally call every principal in the area to sternly remind them of what their job entails. Stay strong, and speak up. We're here if you need us."_

Nooooooo0o wrote back, _"_ im _gonna tell my homeroom teacher. shes super nice. thank you Wash! everyone here is the best 3333!"_

Denki replied with a chipper, "No, you are!" and held up his hands, that he'd made a heart shape with, in front of the camera.

"Now let's cheer our sweet No up!" Denki began, "Let's play 'Who Had the Weirdest Day,' again!"

It was one of the more popular games that Ch4rgeb0lt played. It was a sneaky way to get his viewers to interact openly with him and each other and fostered the special kind of intimacy that comes with sharing your troubles with people who really care. Back when Shinsou was merely MindWash, in Denki's eyes, he often won with stories about his students. Today provided quite a lot of fodder for the chat, as well.

 _"I took my boyfriend, and our friends, to my dads' house and my father threatened them with a concrete burial. One of them met the cat that had been named after him and realized the two were basically the same entity. After_ that _I saw the world's lamest gang showdown that ended up with one squad ignoring the other in favor of play-fighting in the middle of the street. I guess you could call that weird?"_

Ch4rgeb0lt released a nervous laugh, probably remembering how scary Aizawa gets when he means business, "Yeah, that sounds pretty weird! I feel bad for your boyfriend and his friends! I'm super jelly that you've got a lover though."

The chat agreed, most of them shocked that one of Ch4rgeb0lt's biggest fans was dating a real person. If they knew he was dating their bestie/bae they'd respond a lot differently, but it's not like he would out Denki like that anyway.

 _"Don't worry about the boyfriend,"_ Shinsou typed, _"You're the only one for me."_ He felt incredibly exposed saying that, since he meant it from the bottom of his heart, and hoped that Kaminari would read it in a more casual tone.

"Awww," Denki cooed, "You're gonna make your boyfriend all jealous! He must be super cute to get a catch like you!"

 _"Yeah. He really is."_ Hitoshi couldn't stop himself from adding, _"He's also really beautiful, funny, and kind. I don't think I could even imagine someone better than him. I hope he wants to be with me as much as I want to be with him."_

Shinsou looked up from his phone to meet eyes with Denki. The blonde had love in his gaze when he turned back to the camera and said, "I'm sure he really likes you too. I bet you're incredibly special to him, and that he wants you to know it. Next time you see him just ask how he feels! I'll have my fingers crossed for you, MindWash!"

Fellow viewers chimed in with reassuring words, though some said Ch4rgeb0lt was playing favorites. Kaminari finished chewing on a noodle before responding with, "Hey, now! You know if any of you mentioned a lover I'd say the same thing! All of my viewers are the bestest people ever. Most of you have been with me for ages, and I can personally vouch that whoever you end up with will be the luckiest person in the world for having you!"

It was on this note that Denki looked at the clock in the corner of the screen, "Looks like it's that time again, sweetlings! Some of you should already have been in bed! Don't think I don't see what timezone each of you are in!" He twirled a finger through a stray lock of blonde hair, "I'm so happy that I get to spend time with angels like you. Will you dream of me tonight?" He winked at the camera and pressed a kiss to his fingers with a loud "mwah!" before pressing them up against the lens. After he pulled himself back he held his two fingers out in their usual signature goodbye pose. A bright spark ran from one hand to the next as his sing-songy voice said, "Zap you later!"

While watching Kaminari, Shinsou made sure to do his ritual kiss to his own fingers and then pressed them against his screen. He was glad that Denki couldn't see him do it. He'd be super embarrassed at how lame he probably looked in the eyes of the bombshell currently closing the stream and setting down his laptop.

Hitoshi put his phone back in his pocket and stood up. It was only a few steps to get to the couch Kaminari was sitting on, and soon he was draped over the shoulders of the shorter man, nuzzling his face into the other boy's neck. "Great stream, though I'm sure I don't have to tell you."

Denki lifted a hand to affectionately play with Shinsou's hair. "Yeah, I hope that Noooo is alright. She's going through a tough time. The things you said to her were awesome. I should have thought of that before telling her to take a taser to the guy, huh?"

"Nah," Hitoshi answered, "She needed someone to say they'd fight for her. When I was bullied I had always wanted someone to say they'd kick my bully's ass. I knew it wouldn't solve anything in the long run, but I wanted to see someone cared enough about me to want to see him hurt. Conveniently, my dads had no trouble scaring the little shits to the point where the kids literally wet their pants. I'm glad you let her know that you'd probably go to jail for beating up a child in her honor."

"I totally would," Kaminari sighed.

Shinsou finally sat down properly on the couch, and pulled Denki into his lap, "So, somebody told me I should ask my boyfriend how he feels about me."

Kaminari laughed, "Yeah, I guess I did say that, didn't I?" The blonde leaned forward to press a gentle kiss against Shinsou's lips, "I think my boyfriend is the most handsome and sweet guy in the whole world, and that it's a miracle he wants a dork like me. He's an amazing teacher and an even more amazing friend. He's pretty inspirational, you know? I'm glad that fate brought him into my life- even if he started as a weird internet creep."

"That was really sweet until the last part. Gee, thanks." Shinsou huffed out an amused breath, "You really love all your viewers, don't you? Maybe too much."

Denki wrapped his arms tightly around Hitoshi's shoulders before mumbling, "I do love them, and I'm not gonna quit, you know. You can't make me."

Shinsou put a warm and reassuring hand on the blonde's side, "I would never ask you to. They're family, I get it."

"Family, best friends, and also kinda lovers...not like _real_ ones, but still," Kaminari spoke a bit too quickly, nervous that he'd push Hitoshi away by admitting it. "You're really okay with sharing me like that?"

Shinsou cupped Denki's face and brought him into another kiss. This one deeper, with one hand dropping to stroke along the blonde's back in a comforting gesture. He pulled away, "As long as the only one who can take you out on real dates is me."

"Duh!" Kaminari whined, "Now get back to the part where you're kissing me!"

Shinsou laughed and leaned back in. He couldn't count the number of times he'd sat on this couch after the stream and missed the boy who was currently on his lap.

"Also," the blonde stopped their kiss to add, "I'm totally going to be the big spoon when we sleep."

Hitoshi laughed, "Sure, Denki."

Later, when they were ten minutes into sleeping side by side, Kaminari had already found himself curled up in Shinsou's arms. Big spoon, indeed.


	22. Chapter 22

Hitoshi woke up with a mouthful of blonde hair, and he was surprisingly okay with that.

After the stream last night, Kaminari had suggested that Shinsou have his own Cup Noodles and that they would chat, "Just the two of us! Like that song, you know?" Denki had even insisted upon making it for him and breaking the chopsticks (unevenly) before handing it over for the purple-haired man to eat. Hitoshi tried to wave it off adding, "It's difficult to eat when someone's watching you."

Which, considering Kaminari's internet profession, made the blonde laugh hysterically.

Denki borrowed a shirt and boxers and had them both play rock, paper, scissors for who would get what side of the bed. This turned out to be irrelevant since it took less than five minutes for Kaminari to force Hitoshi onto his back so he could curl up on his chest like the cats he so loved. Shinsou had slept surprisingly well and attributed it to the company, but woke up feeling tired nonetheless. Unfortunately, even having Kaminari present couldn't turn him into a well-rested person.

In the early morning light, Shinsou squinted before burying his face back into blonde locks. He didn't know what time it was but he dreaded leaving a warm bed with his boyfriend for a cold kitchen by himself- no matter how badly he wanted coffee. Hitoshi tried to see the face of his watch from the angle he was bent into, but it was covered by a carelessly shoved blanket. Judging by the lack of sun, he probably had some time before he needed to be at the school. Not that it should keep him from getting up anyway. He could already imagine the obnoxious hijinx that his kids would be getting up to. The purple-haired man had one arm pulled free of his bed-mate, and was working on a leg when his thoughts were interrupted by a sound not unlike a mouse being told it has to wait until after dinner for dessert.

Denki had woken up.

Sort of.

His mouth that was full of blonde hair became a mouth of blonde forehead instead as the human sloth tried to stop him from getting out of bed. It mumbled, "T'rly."

"What?"

Kaminari angled his head slightly so his mouth wasn't pressed against his boyfriend's collarbone. "I said too early . Go back to sleep."

Shinsou brushed Denki's hair out of his face, "I have to go to school."

The shorter man wrapped both of his legs around Hitoshi's in a sleepy vice grip, "You're an adult. You don't gotta do that anymore."

"Denki, I'm a teacher. That's three-fourths of my job."

The blonde made another unhappy mouse sound before replying, "Balls," and flopped to the side so Shinsou could get up.

He was halfway to standing when he was pulled back hard enough to throw him back down.

"Wait!" Denki whined, "It's the weekend! Fuck your school and get back to bed."

Hitoshi did the mental math and counted through the week. Lo and behold, it really was Saturday and even if it wasn't he stood no chance against the tired octopus his boyfriend had become overnight. Shinsou embraced his fate and stole the entirety of the blanket for himself. Kaminari would just have to deal with it if he was going stop him from leaving.

Hitoshi rolled himself up in the covers and left Denki to fend for himself in the cold morning air.

The blonde tugged on the corner, trying to unwrap the lump of blanket with purple sticking out of the top, "Hey, I was trying to cuddle in that!"

Shinsou waited for a few beats before lifting the heavy blanket up with one arm, "You have three seconds before all the heat is gone."

Kaminari took this warning to heart and burrowed his way back under with a dumb smile on his face. "We should do this every morning."

The taller man snorted, "What? Fight over a blanket after convincing each other we shouldn't be responsible adults?"

Shinsou felt Denki shake his head no from where he was pressed up against his chest. "I meant snuggle and stuff, but that works too."

"We can do it on Saturdays, at least."

Kaminari took a sharp breath, "Wait, Saturdays?"

"You told me it was the weekend less than a minute ago."

"Yeah, cause I thought it was Sunday! Crap!" Hitoshi felt a draft as Denki rolled out from under the covers and out of bed, "I have a morning shift!" The blonde's foot caught on the end of the blanket and dragged it off of Shinsou.

The purple-haired man grumbled, "I'm canceling that 'we can do it on Saturdays' line. This better not be how you usually get out of bed."

Kaminari pouted, "Oh come on, I'll make you coffee! I can't make a Yes Cat unless you have the stuff for it, but if you gimme a chance to heat some milk I could try."

Hitoshi would be lying if he said he was ever not okay with getting coffee. Especially if it was made by Denki. Whether that came down to the blonde's skill or just the sentiment of his boyfriend making it, he may never know.

"...Alright," Shinsou sighed as he put his feet down on the cold wooden floor. A shiver ran down his spine and Kaminari laughed when Hitoshi pulled them back up to the warmth of the mattress.

Denki lifted the blanket and draped it around his boyfriend like a cape, "What happened to all that energy you were gonna use to go to school with, babe?"

"If I don't have to use it I'm not going to." Shinsou put his feet back onto the floor and refrained from jumping back. He wouldn't let Kaminari enjoy his pain more than once.

"Upsy daisy!" Denki called, as he grabbed Hitoshi's hands and helped him to stand. "Go sit on the couch and I'll bring you something warm to drink. Don't even tell me where you keep your stuff. I got mad barista senses. I'll find it."

Shinsou snorted and wrapped the blanket around his shoulders more tightly, "Knock yourself out." He followed behind a far too chipper Kaminari and sat down on the sofa between his room and the kitchen. The laptop was still laying on the table from the night before, and the makeshift set was stacked next to it. He was glad the couch was big because it meant he could kick up his feet and hook them under the end of the blanket to keep him warm and wrapped up.

He could hear his boyfriend messing around in the kitchen, cups clinking over a coffee machine humming, and he couldn't help but feel like he wanted to live this moment in a loop for the rest of his life. Sitting comfortably while waiting for caffeine to find its way to him instead of the other way around was delightful in ways Shinsou had never felt before. He hid a smile under the blanket.

"Hey, babe?" Kaminari poked his head out of the kitchen, "I legit can't find your coffee stuff. Can you show me where it is while I go revoke my barista license?"

Shinsou was not getting out from under this blanket if he could help it. He shouted back, "Grounds are in the freezer, and the filters are in the drawer under the machine. I know you at least found that from all the buzzing it's doing."

"Dude, you need a new one. This thing is so old it could describe the kitchen of the Titanic."

Hitoshi preferred the term 'well-loved' instead of old, but he'd admit it was a bit on the loud side. He yelled back over the sounds of the machine whirring, "How'd you know I bought it at a garage sale in the North Atlantic Ocean?"

He could hear Denki's cackle from the sofa and felt very pleased with himself. The Titanic may have sunk but his jokes never would.

Underneath all of the mechanical noise he heard Kaminari humming, and let himself take a moment to enjoy that Ch4rgeb0lt was making him coffee in his kitchen while technically serenading him.

Life was weird and he loved it.

Before too long Denki came walking back, carefully holding two full mugs of coffee. The blonde handed him the bigger one, "I didn't have my usual set of tools so your cat kind of looks like a wobbly house, but it's the thought that counts." Looking down into the cup he could see the goofy looking foam cat smiling up at him. It really was pretty horrendous but that gave it charm. The mouth twitch he made had Denki's face lighting up with a smile. "Drink it!"

Hitoshi brought it to his lips and took a sip. It was hot enough to nearly burn his tongue, as he liked it, and the grounds tasted better than they ever had. Such was the power of love, he joked to himself. Kaminari joined him on the couch and demanded to share the blanket, placing ice cold feet on top of Shinsou's and nearly upsetting both of their cups. "Jesus. Were your feet the icebergs that sank my coffee machine's last home?"

Denki ran a foot up his boyfriend's thigh and laughed when he jumped from the chill.

"I'm buying you socks for the next time you stay over."

Kaminari frowned, "Why not just give me a pair of yours?"

"You'd drown in them."

"My big personality would keep me afloat."

Hitoshi chuckled into his coffee cup and tucked the edges of the blanket carefully over both of their feet. They each took a sip and were enjoying the silence when Kaminari asked his lover. "Oh hey, put that mug down a second?"

Shinsou furrowed his brows up placed the cup down on the table, "What's wrong?"

Denki lifted his hand lightning fast and slapped Shinsou across his cheek, "And that's for not telling me you were MindWash!"

"Ow! Fuck, that hurt!"

Kaminari smiled innocently and shrugged, "I told you I'd get you when you weren't expecting it."

Hitoshi rubbed his face, though it didn't hurt half as much as he said it did, frowning. "Remind me not to tell you any secrets again."

The blonde laughed and grabbed Shinsou's mug to lift it back up to him, "Nah. You'll tell me. I'm charming like that."

The purple-haired man reluctantly took back his drink because, no matter how upset he could pretend to be, that would only get in the way of him and more coffee. "When do you have to be at the shop?"

Kaminari grabbed Shinsou's wrist to read his watch, "I've got a bit of time. I'm always late anyway."

"Don't you literally live in the same building?"

The blonde shrugged, "That just makes it even worse. I can keep going 'it'll only take me a moment' and then suddenly I'm being dragged downstairs by an unhappy Jirou or a really unhappy Bakugou. She sends him up instead if she's angry."

Hitoshi took another gulp of coffee, "I still can't tell whether or not he tolerates me."

"He totally does!" Kaminari set his cup down to gesture with his hands as he spoke, "You just can't tell cause he doesn't want you to, but he's a total softie. He even gave me a birthday card once! I mean, all it said was 'Hey shithead, you're not the worst,' but for him that's practically an 'I love you bro!' right?"

"Right." Shinsou echoed and wondered what it was Kirishima must have done to convince him to write Kaminari a birthday card.

Denki continued, "At first I was like, that doesn't make sense! Where is the scary part? Is it written in the blood of someone I love? Did the rest of the squad write it so that I'd be happy? But then I checked through his datebook and it's the same handwriting! Don't tease him about the datebook, though. Mina learned that the hard way. She used to have three horns."

Hitoshi widened his eyes, "Seriously?"

Kaminari burst out into laughter, "I'm sorry! I couldn't help myself."

For good measure, Shinsou nudged him in the leg with a probably still cold foot.

"Besides," Denki added, "You can't judge me for weird friends. Yours are crazy."

"If we're doing a comparison you don't stand a chance. You saw how calm they were while you weirdos fought in the street, right?"

The blonde's eyes lit up, "Yeah! Todoroki was on fire last night."

"Very funny," Shinsou deadpanned.

The two finished their coffee, and Kaminari placed both of their mugs carefully on the table before untangling himself from the blanket. He stood and stretched while yawning loudly, "Alright, time to see my way cooler friends."

Hitoshi faked a wounded expression, "Cooler than me?"

"I meant cooler than yours and you know it."

"If you aren't going to make the Todoroki joke about being 'cool' then I will."

"Boooo!" Kaminari howled but laughed all the same. "You wanna come with? Today we have a special discount for decaf drinks."

Shinsou scoffed, "Decaf? I'm insulted. What kind of boyfriend are you if I can't get my hands on cheap caffeine?"

The shorter man shot Hitoshi a mischievous grin, "The kind that could text your dad the picture of you eating cheap ramen last night. He'd just love your healthy diet, huh?"

"You are a cruel man, Denki Kaminari."

* * *

I've written a NSFW fic that takes place in this AU, but is set for some weeks after so there aren't any problems left for them. Check my profile to find it! It's called Fuck Me Through The Screen, because of course it is.


	23. Chapter 23

Kaminari and Shinsou finished their coffee while cuddling on the couch. The problem of cold feet was solved by tangling their bodies together for warmth. Hitoshi thought he couldn't have felt any more in love than he was, but then Denki would smile and tell a stupid joke and he'd fall all over again. If they weren't on a deadline Shinsou would conveniently distract him from ever leaving their embrace, but he was determined to get Kaminari to work on time. For once in the blonde's life. "We should head out soon. Your shift is coming up."

Denki frowned and snuggled closer to his boyfriend, "Can't I just call in sick?"

"Sorry, babe, but Jirou isn't stupid."

Kaminari ignored everything but the endearment and lit up, "Oh my god! You called me babe!" He immediately pulled his phone out of his pocket and started typing.

"Are you seriously memorializing the first time I called you babe?"

"No," Denki tapped furiously at his phone's screen, "I'm telling the squad! They will totally die." When he finished sending the group text he looked back up at Shinsou, "Wait, first time ? You're gonna call me babe again!? Dude, I have to ready my heart."

Hitoshi snorted, "It's not that big a deal. You call me babe all the time."

"Yeah, but I say those kinds of things in general and you never do. I'm feeling pretty honored."

"You should," Shinsou reluctantly pulled himself off the couch, "Now let's get to work."

Kaminari made a disappointed noise but allowed himself to be lifted from the sofa. The blonde picked up their mugs and tottered off to the kitchen to rinse them. Whether it was thoughtful or just a reflex from his job, Shinsou may never know.

Hitoshi stretched, bones cracking and joints straining, "If you like nicknames that much, Bakugou must be your best friend."

Denki turned around and shot him a look that was probably supposed to be reproachful but looked fond instead. "Oh yeah, eye bags ? You'll get used to it. If you're lucky you'll get a whole bunch like I did. I'm pretty sure that the more insulting nicknames he has for you the more he cares."

Shinsou didn't have the heart to argue that Kirishima barely has any and he's clearly the most beloved. "Let's get dressed for the outside world. Do you need to borrow any clothes?"

Kaminari laughed, "Dude, I'd look stupid running around in things that are too big for me. I'm not Bakubro, I can't rock the sagging pants look."

Hitoshi pulled Denki towards him for a kiss, "I'm sure we could make something work."

They were never going to leave at this rate.

When the two lovers walked into Amped Up, Jirou looked at them from behind the counter with a shocked expression. "Wow. I've never seen Denki be early to work before. Usually he's as late as Bakugou is angry."

Kaminari pouted, but couldn't keep the affection for the girl out of his eyes. He clearly treasured his friend, no matter how frequently she teased him.

The aforementioned Bakugou muttered a succinct, "Fuck you too, ear lobes," from the table he was sitting at with Kirishima. Mina was stacking muffins carefully onto a tray, and Sero was nowhere to be seen. Which meant he was probably on a grocery run- he had the longest arms and was often the chosen gopher for any and all carrying jobs.

Denki strolled to the kitchen and disappeared through the doorway, leaving Shinsou to stand there nervously in the presence of the infamous squad. He put his hands in his pockets and tried his best to look nonchalant.

Jirou sensed his discomfort and took pity on him, asking, "You want your usual latte? I'm not drawing a cat on it but you're welcome to a cup if you want. I owe you for being a good influence."

The purple-haired man nodded and Kyouka went to work at the machine, tamping down coffee grinds and steaming milk with practiced ease. Mina had finished her muffin stacking and skipped to the door to flip the sign from 'Closed' to 'Chopin' (which Shinsou thought was a horrendous example of wordplay).

Denki returned, donned in an apron, to find Hitoshi accepting a latte from Jirou, he gave an exaggerated gasp, "Cheating on me already? I thought I had a couple more weeks before that, at least!"

Kirishima laughed, "Dude, you're low self-esteem is showing."

"Cool your jets, I specifically didn't draw him a foam cat," Jirou sighed, "And no offense, but he's not exactly my type. You can have him."

Kaminari looked inordinately pleased with himself and pulled his boyfriend over to give him a loud 'mwah' on the cheek.

Mina imitated the sound of vomiting.

The morning rush came and went, and Shinsou was treated to free coffee and snacks the same way the rest of the squad was. He tried not to think about how wonderful it felt to be included. Outside of his teaching friends, he'd never had a close gang of buddies before. It felt oddly like family. An insane and ridiculous family, but family nonetheless.

When he wasn't part of a conversation, Hitoshi watched his boyfriend interact with customers the way narrators of nature documentaries might do with a rare species. Kaminari was a creature in his natural habitat- social, attentive, and surprisingly adroit. His short attention span was perfect for quick orders and Denki fell into an easy rhythm with his co-workers at his side. His personality was loud but warm, and even the customers who were short-fused seemed happy enough with his service. It was no wonder that Ch4rgeb0lt was successful.

The surge of caffeine-seekers died down, and the cafe was once again fairly quiet. Well, as quiet as it could be with the Bakusquad present. Some patrons of the store had bothered Bakugou and Kirishima for autographs, and Mina put up the frequently used 'please don't disturb our extremely cool friends,' sign. If that didn't stop them, Bakugou's angry reactions did.

When Sero stumbled back into the cafe, arms loaded with bags and a box, Kirishima stood up to help him carry them to the kitchen.

"Wait," Hanta carefully put his items down, "We got a package. It was left outside the door."

Jirou raised an eyebrow before extracting the bundle from Sero's hands, "It doesn't have a return address or name anywhere."

The gang crowded around and looked at the seemingly innocent cardboard box.

"Think it's a bomb?" Mina asked.

Kirishima laughed, "We already got one of those," and jabbed his boyfriend in the side with a playful elbow.

Denki took a step back, "I call dibs on not opening it."

"You're all fucking cowards," Bakugou growled as he tore open the package. Everyone else jumped back to give him space, expecting the worst. "It's just a goddamn book. Shady-looking as hell, though."

The group closed in again to stare down the item when Mina gasped, "I think it's for you, Denks."

On the cover of the book, "Ch4rgeb0lt" was written in a careful script. It wasn't too thick, and It looked more like a scrapbook than anything else.

"Maybe it's just the longest ransom note ever?" Kirishima offered.

"Ransoming what? Dunce Face is right here."

"Oh yeah..."

Kaminari reached down to pick it up, "Only one way to find out!"

He opened the book to reveal a picture of himself behind the counter, talking to a customer who wasn't in focus. The page after that was a side shot of Denki carefully drawing foam art, and the one that followed was a screenshot that Shinsou recognized was from Ch4rgeb0lt's stream. It was a shot of his signature sign off and caught the exact moment one finger's bolt jumped to another.

The room was quiet until Bakugou scoffed, "You wore that fucking shirt on your stream? Your fashion sense is almost as bad as Shitty Hair's is. That color clearly clashes with your ugly hair. Are you blind?"

Kaminari frowned, "Thanks for paying attention to that instead of my safety, or whatever. You're a great bro, Katsuki."

"You're welcome, fuckface."

Shinsou felt his stomach drop when he noticed he was in some of the photos. Candid shots of the two of them walking down the street, and a couple where he was in the background of some cafe pictures. Whoever put this book together must have been very stealthy. Hitoshi hadn't noticed a thing.

"Dude," Sero mumbled, "Your stalker is seriously spooky. They even got a couple of shots of us together. There's no way they haven't been to this cafe a bunch of times."

"The photography is surprisingly good though," Mina hummed.

Most of the pictures were taken from outside of the shop, the glass storefront making it easy to see the people inside. All it took was a zoom lens and you were practically inside.

On second glance, a couple of the photos had notes next to them. Things like, "Your hair looked nice that day," "You seem very close with your friends," "I ate Cup Noodles with you that night," "I bet your coffee tastes really good," and "I think you're cool!" Shinsou looked at Kaminari to find him biting his lip, unsettled but unable to look away.

The purple-haired man put a reassuring hand on Denki's hip, "Don't worry. We'll get to the bottom of this."

"I know," Kaminari started, "But there's something weird about it. I mean, besides the obvious. It feels more like a scrapbook you'd make for a bro than it does anything sinister. Like, if someone was commemorating a friendship? There isn't anything suggestive and all the notes are really innocent."

Mina nodded, "Yeah, it does kinda feel like that. It doesn't have any threats or weird sex things in it either."

"I bet this person thinks it was a nice idea. Like a thoughtful gift, you know?" Kirishima mumbled.

"We don't know that for sure," Bakugou crossed his arms as he thought aloud, "the fucker could just be messing with our heads. Until we know that this isn't a threat we should treat it like one."

"So what do we do now?" Kaminari asked, closing the book of photos.

Shinsou thought of the various options, "Do you all remember what my dad said? We could either bring Denki outside and keep an eye out for anyone following us, set up a trap to catch the stalker with cameras, or use Denki as bait. Personally, I'd like to avoid the last one."

Kaminari nodded his head vigorously, "Ditto."

"What if we just had Sero cover the ground outside the shop with a bunch of tape? Flytrap him." Mina asked.

Kirishima frowned, "Dude, I can think of, like, 69 reasons why that's a bad idea."

"69? Nice," Sero approved and then high-fived Kaminari.

Jirou sighed, "I hate you two so much."

"If we wanna catch him following me, that means I gotta go out somewhere, right? Where would I go and how do we even know if the creepy guy is watching?" Denki looked to Shinsou for help.

"You could just walk around the neighborhood while the rest of us watch your back?"

"That still doesn't mean the guy will be there," Jirou stated, "Besides, he probably only comes around when we're busy. Otherwise we would have caught him already."

"I got it!" Mina shouted, "When it gets busy we have Denki stand outside to hand out, like, coupons or something and the rest of us all have binoculars and are stationed around the area. We come up with codenames and bird calls, and if anyone suspicious starts lurking around-"

Katsuki groaned, "Can you shut your dumb fucking mouth for one minute and let the grown-ups talk?"

"Search your heart, Bakugou," Kaminari went to pat the angry ash blonde on the back, "Find your inner chill." Katsuki immediately jerked his body out of the way before it made contact.

Sero clasped a sympathetic hand on Denki's shoulder, "Stop pretending he has any chill to find."

Bakugou growled but the rest of the squad was too used to it to notice.

"The guy could be watching us right now ," Mina whispered while searching the room. Her statement was unnerving enough that they all took a cursory glance at the window.

Kirishima smiled, "If only one of us was brave enough to be the lookout and stand by the door…"

Nobody answered because they all knew exactly who that comment was aimed at.

"Fine. If you fuck ups don't have the balls to do it then I will," Bakugou stormed to the front of the shop and stood there looking like a guard dog.

Shinsou was impressed, "I'm amazed you got him to do it."

Sero laughed, "That's nothing. Once we convinced Mina that lipstick was only for the lower lip and lip gloss was for the top one. She went a whole week like that."

"My arm was bruised from her punch for, like, a year when she found out," Kaminari added. "Still worth it."

Mina whined, "Ugh, I forgot about that! I deserve one more punch to your face, at least."

"You can't hit me anymore, I have a boyfriend now!" Denki shrieked, lifting the curious book up as a shield while he laughed.

"That isn't a thing, dude," Kirishima snorted.

Bakugou scowled from his post by the window, "If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest fucking asshole on the planet."

"Would you say that I'm..." he sent a small burst of electricity out from the finger guns he made, "guilty as charged ?"

The following chorus of exasperated groans wasn't enough to wipe the smug look off of Kaminari's face.

Shinsou might have been embarrassed on his behalf if he wasn't slightly amused, but he'd never admit that in front of the others.

"Well, I'm out of ideas," Sero sighed, "The guy doesn't seem like he means any harm, anyway. He's just a creep. I get that."

"You would," Mina jeered.

"I meant that I understand he isn't necessarily a bad guy. He hasn't asked for anything. He just gives gifts. That's not the worst, right?"

Kaminari shook his head, "It's not the worst. I don't think he's dangerous either, but...I'm still kind of scared? Just cause it's a mystery. I hate not understanding what's going on."

Bakugou laughed, "Then you must hate every second of your life, huh?"

"Nice," Jirou smirked.

"Big oof," Kaminari held a hand to his 'wounded' heart.

Shinsou sighed, "Let's get back to the problem at hand. Are we agreeing to follow Denki around the neighborhood and look for anyone suspicious?"

"Aye-aye Captain!" Mina shouted, "But I'm still insisting we use codenames. None of that Eagle 1 crap either. I want to be Big Pink Kahuna 73."

"I'm pretty sure codenames are supposed to be easier to say than that," Kirishima looked like he was taking this turn of events very seriously, "But if you're going to be the pink one can I be Big Red Kahuna 73?"

Sero shook his head in exasperation, "You're acting like idiots."

Bakugou looked pleased but surprised, "Looks like you finally fucking get it, Tape Face."

Hanta continued, "Obviously If you're gonna be a Kahuna you still have to pick a new number. We can't all be 73. You should use 69 like earlier, but if you don't want it then I'm taking it."

"I'm ashamed that I even let myself fucking imagine that you had a brain cell," Katsuki grumbled with a hand against his face.

"Haven't you all had enough already?" Jirou asked, "I'm making the decision for us. During our next busy hour, we're having Denki take a walk around the neighborhood, and some of you will be following him. Sero and Mina will be staying here because I am not handling the rush by myself."

The two aforementioned employees made disapproving whines but didn't argue. You don't fuck with Jirou.

"Man," Denki clutched the book to his chest, "You guys are the sweetest. I don't know how I got such awesome friends."

If they were alone, Shinsou would have told him it's because he's a precious and lovable person who brings happiness wherever he goes but he isn't brave enough to say that in front of the gang.

"Bro," Kirishima's eyes started to glisten, "You're our friend to the end, man. I'm gonna keep you mega safe. Katsuki and I will have your back 100%!"

Kaminari threw the book on a nearby table before running to Eijirou for a manly secret handshake and a bear hug. Sero shouted, "Dogpile!" and soon he and Mina had jumped into the hugging fray. Jirou and Bakugou watched with rolling eyes at their dramatics.

"Shinsou," Mina shouted, "Join us!"

The purple-haired man walked up to them cautiously. He'd never been part of a group hug, much less the affectionate pile in front of him. Kaminari must have seen his trepidation because he leaned out of the group to drag Hitoshi in by the arm. Soon he was enveloped in a blanket of friendly wriggling and nuzzling. If Shinsou were a more emotional man he might have cried.

"Oi!" Bakugou yelled, "Break it up, you fucks, we've got company!"

Hitoshi turned to look at the ash blonde and saw a camera flash out of the corner of his eye. He could have sworn he saw a man standing in the window but by the time his eyes looked for it there was no one there.

"Was that a flash?" Jirou asked.

"Oh fuck!" Sero stepped back from the huddle, "I bet that was the dude! We gotta go after him!"

Mina hollered, "Yeah! I want a copy of the group picture he took! I bet we look super cute and my outfit is on point today!"

"Not the time, Mina!" Kaminari ran towards the window with the rest of them. Bakugou had opened the door and was already rushing out of it. Shinsou took off behind him. They had a man to catch, and a (hopefully) cute group photo to save.


	24. Chapter 24

I made a ShinKami Discord server! The link is on my profile page!

Hope to see and talk with you there!

* * *

The moment Shinsou stepped out the door he whipped his head in either direction to spot the culprit. Nobody was there to be seen, and Katsuki was already on the run. Assuming that the bombastic man was on the right track, Hitoshi followed him.

Bakugou stopped short and lifted a hand up to his ear. The man's hearing wasn't the best, but his hunting skills were uncanny all the same.

"I think that fucker went up!"

Shinsou looked around them and found a fire escape that was still pulled up to the second floor of a nearby apartment building. He and Bakugou nodded their heads at each other before Katsuki used his quirk to blast himself up and onto the stairs. Once he reached the ladder he unlocked the metal bars and let it drop down to where Hitoshi was. The purple-haired man climbed up and did his best to keep close to his cursing and screaming friend.

He could hear the others weren't too far behind him, some of them having decided to take the street instead of the rooftops. It was moments like this that Shinsou wished he'd studied- and carried- his dad's capture tape. Though he had very little grace, Hitoshi kept up behind Katsuki until they both heard the clang of another fire escape. A sound of heavy feet landing on the metal balcony.

Bakugou shared a quick look with Shinsou and the two followed the noise back down to the street- Hitoshi had awkwardly almost tumbled down the various stairs and ladders to get there.

Once they're back on solid ground, the two men continued their running until they nearly crashed into each other at an abrupt halt. They saw someone make a sharp turn to the right, and heard an alarmed cry. The two men ran to the scene and found a shocking sight.

"What the fuck?"

Shishikura stood there, startled but composed, "To what do I have the honor of your company?"

The slapping of shoes on pavement echoed from behind them, and the Bakusquad soon there and primed to fight. Kaminari, however, looked as sad as he did surprised. "Seiji!? You're behind this?"

The purple-haired hero raised an eyebrow, "Behind what?"

Bakugou marched up to Shishikura and shoved a finger in his face, "The shitty pictures, the stalking...You were just outside the cafe! Don't fucking lie, we saw your creepy ass waiting!"

Seiji scoffed, clearly offended, "I think you might be referring to the frog boy I just turned with my quirk. He was running at great speed from your direction after I saw him use his tongue to swing down from that roof. I was going to arrest him for dangerous behavior and mischievous conduct- It looks like I wasn't wrong." Shishikura stepped aside and the meatball of Asui Samidare, Tsuyu's younger brother, was wriggling on the ground. One long frog tongue lolled out of it and the eyes looked panicked. A fancy looking camera was smashed on the ground beside him.

Everyone was silent until Mina said, "Well, shit."

"Shall I release him?" Seiji asked, gesturing to the meatball wobbling to his left.

Kaminari nodded hesitantly, "Yeah."

Shishikura let his quirk go with a dramatic flick of his wrist. Samidare was sprawled on the floor, and spared one remorseful look at his camera before facing Denki and shouting, "I'm sorry! Please don't be mad at me!"

The meatball hero looked sympathetically at the culprit and stood somewhat protectively at the sight of someone cowering the way he was. Shinsou supposed Seiji was more of a softy than he'd thought.

"Didn't we just meet you yesterday? I don't get it, man." Kirishima scratched the back of his head, "Did Tsuyu talk about Denki or something?"

Insan1ty shook his head, "I remember seeing Ch4rgeb0lt...no, Kaminari on tv at the sports festival and thinking that heroes can be funny and nice, but then I found him online and he was my best friend! I'd never had somebody like that before."

"That isn't exactly what I had in mind when I started my stream…" Denki thought aloud. "I'm glad I could be your friend, but this is way too much. I mean, like, a photo album? Mega spooky."

Samidare looked infinitely small from his spot on the floor, "I almost screwed up when I bumped into you and your friends, and I couldn't believe my eyes the first time I saw you at the cafe! After that, it was hard not to come back, but I promise I just wanted you to see how special you are to me."

Kaminari walked forward and crouched down, two feet in front of his admirer, before saying, "There are better ways of doing that, dude. You were such a nice guy on the stream. I already knew you cared, and I cared about you too. I still do."

Samidare looked up with tears building in his eyes, "Seriously?"

"I get that you meant well, but that's not how you treat another person. Whether or not you think they're special." Denki stood up and stepped back beside Shinsou, who put a protective hand around his waist.

Sero's forehead wrinkled, "How did we never see you come in? They said your IP address was in the same district as Amped Up."

"My sister's phone…" Samidare mumbled, "Once I got banned from the stream I thought I'd try it from hers. She was distracted by her girlfriend. I only needed to be online for a little. I knew if I went inside again that I wouldn't be able to stay away."

"Just cause you got small dick energy doesn't make it okay to be a creeper!" Mina shouted.

Shinsou thought that was a low blow, but he really didn't care about the frog man's feelings right now.

"Hey, assmunch," Bakugou sneered, "What the fuck kind of shit were you going to do next? Leave dead mice on the doorstep with hearts carved in 'em?"

Sero blanched, "Fucking Christ, man! It's messed up that you even thought of that."

The ash blonde ignored him, "Well? What was it gonna be?"

Samidare picked up some pieces of his camera and sat them in his lap, "I knew not to go too far. I didn't want to scare him. I didn't think it would be so upsetting. I wasn't going to do more than that after I saw how scared he was when he looked at the scrapbook. I'd never want him to be sad because of me, but wouldn't you be happy if a friend made a gift for you? I thought that was a nice thing to do…"

Kirishima shook his head, "The keyword there is friend, bro You don't know him in real life. He'd never seen you until recently. If you'd shown up to the cafe and just said something it would still be pretty creepy but at least it wouldn't be some mystery guy in the shadows."

Samidare still looked confused, and oddly hopeful.

Shinsou decided to set things straight. He took a few steps closer to the man on the ground.

He had a point to get across.

"I understand how Ch4rgeb0lt can be an important friend, but why did you have to take it so far?"

Samidare dropped the camera pieces he'd been holding and looked down at his balled hands, "I didn't want to scare him! It wasn't sexual or anything, I just love him a lot. I wanted to show him that. Why doesn't anyone understand?"

Shinsou huffed, "I get it. I love him too," and then flinched when he realized Denki was well within hearing range, "which is definitely not the way I wanted him to find that out, but here we are." He gave a heavy sigh and continued, "Loving someone doesn't make it okay to stalk them just because you think they owe you their real world affection. He loves us viewers in a different way, you and I both. Ch4rgeb0lt would never want you to be hurt, but you hurt him."

An idea came to Shinsou. He looked the froggish man in the eyes and asked, "Do you hate him that much?"

Insan1ty's eyes widened, "N...no, of course n-" before going notably dull.

Hitoshi commanded him, "Punch yourself in the face."

The man did.

Shinsou probably didn't need to, but he thought it might make him look a little badass and maybe Denki and the others would be impressed. Hitoshi was still pretty cross with him, anyway, and the kid had it coming.

The Bakusquad, sans Bakugou, chorused a pained hissing noise at the sound of fist on face. Hitoshi wasn't looking at him but he was sure Katsuki silently approved. Any call for violence was usually just fine with the man. If anything, he might be pissed that he wasn't the one to punch the kid first.

"Mindwash!" Seiji's voice held a reprimanding tone, but Shinsou ignored him. He wasn't about to actually beat the kid up, but when he remembered how unsettled it had made Denki, he felt obligated to at least get in one punch.

Samidare groaned, Hitoshi's quirk ending due to the pain, "I guess I kind of deserved that one, huh?"

"You really did, man." Sero snorted.

Bakugou let a small explosion out of his hand, "You're lucky you look too pathetic to be beaten up more. If I catch you pulling this shit again I'll be wearing your teeth on a bracelet, get me?"

The frog man visibly swallowed and nodded vigorously in return.

"You aren't allowed back at the cafe, either," Kirishima added, "I don't like the idea of you hanging around Denki any longer. You can have your book back too."

Samidare sighed, "I should probably get rid of it."

"That's a great start," Kaminari beamed at him, "It's important to learn how to let things go that aren't healthy. You'll be okay without me, I promise."

The frog man looked content with that answer, but solemn nonetheless. Shishikura cleared his throat before stating, "You have the right to remain silent and to have an attorney at your trial should it come to that. You will most likely not require one, but do not think this means we will ignore your behavior.

As Seiji was handcuffing Samidare, the frog man spoke up "Thanks for being really nice about the whole thing, and it was really cool how you showed up to help Ch4rgeb0lt. Even if it was my fault."

Shishikura looked at him in confusion, "You think I'm 'cool' for arresting you?"

Asui looked to the side nervously, "You have really nice eyes too."

Hitoshi was sure that complimenting the heroes weirdly narrow eyes was all it took to win Seiji's favor. As expected, a light blush came to Shishikura's cheeks.

"Well, I...thank you. I'm glad someone appreciates them." Seiji dusted off his coat with finality and extended a hand towards the man on the ground, "As nothing incredibly criminal was done, I imagine the discussion with the police will be a short one." He turned to Kaminari with a questioning glance, "Unless you wish to press charges?"

Denki shook his head with a smile, "Nah. I think he's learned his lesson."

Shishikura helped the stalker up from the floor, "Then we will be going, and I will make Kaminari's decision known to the relevant authorities." Seiji looked back at Samidare and nervously averted his eyes, "Perhaps we can have a conversation about your unfortunate misunderstandings later."

"Yeah," the frog man smiled, "I'd like that."

Seiji saluted the Bakusquad and left, calmly escorting his captive as he did.

Kirishima's jaw was dropped, "Gonna be honest, bro. That was kinda weird."

Bakugou crossed his arms, "Well, this has been a weird fucking day. Let's head back."

The group agreed and started the trek back to Amped Up. After all, Shinsou had a celebratory latte to drink.

Denki walked beside his boyfriend and pulled on his hand for attention. He met Hitoshi's gaze with a smirk, "I get that he's a misguided douchebag, but was making him punch himself in the face really necessary?"

"Yes," Shinsou answered instantly.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw the whole Bakusquad nod their heads in agreement. He knew they'd see it his way.

Kaminari shook his head fondly. He paused a moment before looking up at Shinsou and shyly smiling, "So...you love me?"

"For a long time now. I'm starting to realize that any attempt I make at planning to tell you things never really pan out the way I expected. Does that make me creepy too?"

"No way! It's part of your charm!" Denki laughed. He stopped Shinsou from walking and cupped his face in both hands, "Besides...It's not like it isn't reciprocated, yeah?"

Hitoshi's eyes went wide, "You love me?"

Denki pulled him down for a kiss, ignoring the whistling the Bakusquad was doing behind him, "I think the best answer to that is Yes Cat."

"No," Shinsou said firmly, "I want to hear you say it for real."

He'd never seen Kaminari look at anyone with so much warmth as the blonde said, "I love you."

The purple-haired man was sure his face was three different shades of red, but he'd never felt happier in his life. "So I'm excused from making young adults punch themselves in the face for stalking you?"

"Sure," Kaminari laughed, "I'm still a little pissed, cause I'm not a damsel in distress, but I gotta admit...I think you gave me Kirishima's quirk."

Shinsou cocked his head, "What?"

"Yeah, because that totally made me ha-"

Bakugou interrupted him with a bark, "We're right the fuck here, you dickwaffles."

Kaminari snorted and winked up at Hitoshi, "I guess we'll finish that later."

"Shit!" Mina cried, "We forgot to get that group photo!"

A week later, Kaminari sat in front of his makeshift studio adjusting his camera equipment. "Oh man, I'm super nervous! This is way too big an announcement for me to handle. Should I just scrap it?"

Shinsou put a reassuring hand on his back, "You'll be fine. They already love you- nothing is going to change that."

Denki sighed, "Yeah, I guess you're right. Will you hold my hand while I say it, though?"

The purple-haired man bent over slightly to place a kiss on Kaminari's head. "Of course."

Kaminari fiddled with his hair, "Does this look good? Should I wear something different?" Denki spun around to show off a pair of plaid patterned shorts and a t-shirt with a Tesla Coil on it.

"You're fine. You look cute," Shinsou encouraged him with a loving hand on his cheek, "Let's get things started. Your adoring fans are waiting, right?" The purple-haired man handed him his steaming Cup Noodles with a smile.

Kaminari laughed, gave him a soft kiss on the lips, and then sat back to prepare everything on his computer. After a few taps, the camera's red light came on, and Denki was poised for the stream, Cup Noodles in hand and lightning bolt hair clips holding his bangs back. "Hello, my darlings! I missed you!"

The chat erupted with their usual loving greetings and emojis, "not as much as i missed u!" "did you think about us at work? 33333" and "omg you won't believe the day i had."

"Before we start, I've got a SUPER big announcement today! I'm sort of scared about it, but hopefully you folks will support it! It might be a little sad for some of you, but we'll be okay."

A flurry of concerned responses came, some of them promising they'd love him no matter what, and others praying that he was doing okay.

"I think the best way to do this is with an illustration!" Denki reached just out of frame and grabbed a second Cup Noodles. "I have a very special new friend to introduce you to tonight…"

A tuft of purple hair floated in front of the camera before Shinsou was carefully sitting next to Ch4rgeb0lt, his noodles were handed to him shortly afterward. He looked at the camera with some nervousness on his face, "Uh, hey guys. You might remember me as MindWash."

The chat quickly filled with replies, "HOLY SHIT!" "is this a prank?" "omg team Bae just got 2x as big," "Yay, another dinner buddy!" and "great, now I owe another viewer $5, but I thought it would be someone else."

Hitoshi held his breath when he saw that MeatMeOutBack29 was typing:

"As much as it pains me to say it, I suppose I look forward to our future friendship. However, I would like to announce I am no longer on Team Bae. I have a date later tonight."

Kaminari nearly spilled his Cup Noodles when he cheered for him, "Yeah, boy! Get it, Meat!" He gave a wolf whistle and looked happily towards Shinsou for his response. Hitoshi wore a lazy smile- he'd suspected something after that scene he made at the arrest.

The chat exploded, "omg its the end of an era!" "does that mean u wont fite anymore? But i loved ur cat fites!" "his date is probably his right hand, beat your meat get it?" and "That is soooo cute!"

Shinsou could practically hear the sound of Shishikura awkwardly collecting himself with a cough, as the meat hero added, "However, I am not giving up my administrative duties. Please continue to respect both Ch4rgeb0lt and his rules."

Nobody in the chat was surprised, " lol expected," "yeah you can still do your 'duties' with your left hand," and the very sweet, "I think i'd cry if you weren't the admin anymore. who else would yell at us and use the banhammer like a boss?"

"Hear that, Meat?" Denki smiled, "We're all rooting for you! Our trusty admin." The blonde gave one of his famous winks and put down his noodles so he could make the shape of a heart with his fingers.

Shinsou wasn't sure what he was supposed to do. He never expected to be on a stream before, but he guessed he might as well be authentic. Hitoshi looked into the camera and responded, "I'm sure it'll be difficult for you, but if you want a second date, try not to be yourself."

This was all it took for someone in the chat to reply, "omg it really is mindwash! please bitch at each other forever!"

While Shinsou didn't respond with a yes, he was sure they all knew the playful Wash vs Meat banter wasn't going to end that easily. No matter how friendly the two seemed to be becoming.

Denki slapped Hitoshi's arm lightly but giggled all the same. "Okay, my loves, let's get to it! How has everybody's day been?"

As the night wore on, the two streamers ate their noodles- sharing one set of unevenly broken chopsticks between them- while Kaminari gave Shinsou a proper introduction to his new best friends and lovers. At first, it was a bit awkward but they fell into stride, the two of them had such good chemistry that it came easily to them on camera. Fans had now started tallying up how many people were adding MindWashi to "Team Bae" vs "Team Bestie" and he was turning out to be surprisingly popular. Hitoshi had no idea he'd been so beloved on the stream.

When the time had come for the stream to end, Denki started his farewell.

"Thank you all for accepting our new friend so quickly! He already loved you all and I bet he loves you even more now! We'll think about you all day tomorrow!"

The blonde leaned in to kiss the camera before elbowing his boyfriend with a smile.

The time had come.

Shinsou hesitantly waved at the webcam, one hand lacing fingers with Denki's just out of frame, and smiled, "Wash you later."

* * *

Oh, my sweet dears and darlings I am overwhelmed with thanks and love for how special all of you are to me! This fic would not have been written without your comments and support. I treasure each and every one of you with all my being.

Our journey has finally come to an end, and it was OUR journey, but a new one is just beginning! I hope I can live up to the high expectations you've all set for me when I start posting it in the future.

So, until next time, I will say goodbye with the words of our dear Ch4rgeb0lt...MWAH!

Zap you later!


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